Joy the Baker’s Cutting Room Floor

Cutting Room Floor

I’m full of all sorts of bright ideas when I step in the kitchen.

There seem to be endless ways to combine butter and sugar and flour, and my brain just looooves the possibilities.

And sometimes?  I fail.  Hardcore.  We’re talking sugar burned pans, melted goopy ice cream, disgusting brownies and chocolate chip cookies as hard as hockey pucks.  These things happen.  Often.  You should know.

Above is a picture of the Cinnamon Ice Cream that became one big disaster.  It turns out you can’t melt cinnamon candy, and swirl the scalding hot melted candy sugar into the softened vanilla ice cream.  The candy seizes up and melts the ice cream.  You’re left with sweet milk and giant cinnamon candy blobs.

Instead, I’ll just stick to my Cookie No-Dough Ice Cream.  That stuff was rad.

Cookie No Dough Ice Cream

Cutting Room Floor

I though I might be able to turn these jarred cherries into some pretty stellar cupcakes.  I thought wrong.  The cherries sunk to the bottom of the cupcakes and the cake was just downright icky.

Raspberry Almond Cupcakes.  A classic I can believe in.

Raspberry Almond Cupcakes

Cutting Room Floor

I had every intention of making these Brown Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies and sneaking a dozen of them into the movie theater with a jug of cold milk.  I was going to do that… and then I baked up cookies the consistency and texture of hockey pucks.  That sucked.  Movie popcorn is expensive.

Stick to Alton Brown’s recipe.  The man knows science and facts.

Chocolate Chip Cookies Part 1

Cutting Room Floor

Ooooh brownies.  I thought I could save myself a trip to the grocery store and make brownies from the not-so-great cocoa powder I found in the back of my pantry.  When it comes to brownies, I should know better than to cheat on the chocolate.

These Dark Chocolate Brownies?  My redemption.

Dark Chocolate Brownies

Cutting Room Floor

Low Fat Vanilla Pudding?  Oooh fat and flavor… where have you gone?

Milk Chocolate Pudding.  Always and please.

Milk Chocolate Pudding

78 thoughts on “Joy the Baker’s Cutting Room Floor

  1. HAHA I love this post. We all have the best of intentions, and sometimes our creative minds make unusual things. I want ice cream now…I really need an ice cream maker!

  2. Thank you for sharing your failures. When I first started baking I would always be so upset when something didn’t taste good. I would agonize over the wasted ingredients and time. Now I realize that failure is inevitable if you are willing to try new things with your baking, but it’s still disappointing. Knowing that even a rock star baker like you makes mistakes is comforting.

  3. Isn’t it just the worst when you spend hours making something that you’ve been looking forward to all day and the smell wafts through the house and you think you have a masterpiece… and then it’s awful? Makes you want to hit that hockey puck cookie through the window. But that’s how we learn, isn’t it?

  4. It’s kind of a relief to know that even a great baker can have little problems, we’re not alone! But still you’re my inspiration and now my family loves you and your bright ideas.
    Any idea about microwave baking? It’s starting to be hot here and I don’t feel like using the oven that much now.

    XXX

  5. I always cannot resist the temptation of desserts.They are so delicious.I love them very much.But i cannot make them by myself.I do know how to make them.

  6. wow! so good to read this. i just exploded a free form peach and raspberry tart. my most devastating disaster to date. it’s always when you expect so much that it all goes so wrong. i thought i should get back up on the horse and try some brown butter cookies…ive never used brown butter in a cookie before. so maybe to avoid another tragedy can you tell me where yours went wrong?

  7. Ah ah! same experience with melted dark chocolate over ice cream and coffee… the chocolate instantly get cold from the ice cream…and become a hard block! How stupid I was! cheers Martina

  8. It’s good to know that you’re human! Thanks for sharing the disasters (which I’m sure aren’t anything as bad as some of mine)…now off to make those cookies..

  9. I’m pretty sure I would still think your hockey puck brown butter cookies were delicious! But Milk Chocolate Pudding!? Whoally moaly that is what I’m serving at my next dinner get together!!

  10. Ah it is such a relief to see excellent cooks fail (well.. you know).. as in it’s good to see that they’re human, and just because you fail once, doesn’t mean its allwwaays going to happen, it gives me a smile because it could happen to ANYONE
    you see I am an aspiring cook(ima 16 years old).. baker actually! hahaaha but every time I cook at home, it turns to shit.. I either accidentally used plain instead of self raising and only realised once it was too late, or used a completely wrong sized pan and cooked it for the same amount of time.. one time I even used the same sized pan but doubled the brownie mixture.. I created chocolate butter… not good.
    But in all of it, it was heeeaaps of fun (some what :P)

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