Notes to Self: Part Five

My Notes 1, page 49

so continues the series on Joy the Baker.  I make notes to myself.   How to live.   How not to live… and how it’s ok if I burn the cookies. 

YOU’RE STILL SPEAKING IN ‘SEX AND THE CITY’.  Yes, it’s a television show, but it’s also a language… and yes, it’s weird that you’re speaking it.

You’d think you’d be past all of this, Joy.   You saw Sex in the City 2.  You cried public tears of shame (well… except for the part when those baller Abu Dhabi ladies revealed all their gems and Gucci).  You know that the Sex and The City revolution is over.  Why why why are you still speaking in Carries and Charlottes?

I’ll tell you why. (This is the part where I switch from you’s to I’s.)  In an interview last month I was asked if I’d choose Big or Aidan.  It seriously took me a solid 45 seconds to figure out what they were talking about… and then I thought REALLY!?  Define myself by choosing between two perfectly archetypal men from a ten year old television show!?  Good grief it’s not over.  But see… I’m sometimes guilty of using the same Sex and the City language.

Let’s just lay it all out there.  Am I a Carrie or a Charlotte?

Am I a Carrie or a Charlotte?  Am I a Samantha… or is that character only reserved for Halloween night when every character gets a sexy makeover?  Let’s play the game.  I’ll tell you now that I might be the only girl in the world willing to admit she’s a Miranda.  Yes.  I’m worried that I’m going to choke on Chinese food living alone in my apartment, I overfeed my cat so he won’t eat me, and I pour dish soap on cake in the trash bin (and then I take the trash bin out to the curb for immediate morning pickup).  I love my work.  I look a little clunky when I walk in heels.  I’ll sass you with sarcasm at the brunch table.  And I’ll totally roll my eyes if you tell me one more time you’ve gotten back together with Mr. Big.

Mr. Big or Aidan?  I choose Steve.  Yea…  what does that tell you about my life choices and my shoe closet?  There’s something about a raspy voice, a Catholic mother, and major Dad skills that really appeals to me.  Let’s wear flats and move to Brooklyn, Steve!  Ps… It’s entirely possible that Aiden is the right answer because of the dog, muscular arms, and furniture making skills.  Mr. Big is not the right answer… I could clearly just call a car service and save my heart the grief.

Miranda, you workaholic you… you’re my girl.

In real-life Joy the Baker Sex and the City (aka Joy Went To New York This Summer),  I got splashed by a NYC Taxi in July and I did not feel the least bit sexy.  I almost cried, then I remembered that you’re not allowed to cry on the streets of New York because you’ll look lost and cliché.  So I didn’t.  To be fair… it was only on the legs and I wasn’t wearing a white tutu.

Sex and the City isn’t real.  We’re adults.  We know it’s not real.  Besides, Carrie would never survive in the blog world with just one column a week and an expensive shoe closet and Manhattan apartment to maintain.  Our rational brains know this is impossible, yet we still insist of ragging on the first pear-shaped engagement ring Aidan got Carrie (what is wrong with us!?).  On the other hand HBO’s Girls is real…. too.real… which means we kind of have a problem (and we need to order a pizza to solve it).

Part Four: Everyone

Part Three: Switch

Part Two:  You’re Allowed

Part One:  Be Bold

Things I learned you could Google in the writing of this nonsense: ‘Aidan engagement ring’.  It’s weird because he’s not real…

If it is your instinct to take this nonsense too seriously… don’t.  I’m not really a Miranda, or a Charlotte, or a Carrie… I’m a me, and it’s rad (and awkward).

108 thoughts on “Notes to Self: Part Five

  1. Love it! I don’t still talk in “Sex in the City” language, but I can immediately follow what you’re talking about if you slip into the old lingo :) I’m probably a Charlotte.

  2. I roll my eyes every single time my best friend gets back together with Mr. Big.
    I also think I look pretty klunky walking in heels…
    I’m totally with you, girl.

  3. I’mma have to disagree with you there Joy! It’s not just a TV show. Well, it is, but you know … it was the TV show that made me realise that there were options for women in their 30s that didn’t include marriage and kids and now that I’m 30, I still feel that way – I credit it totally to SATC! And yup, they’re pretty two-dimensional sometimes but I love the girls – well, apart from Carrie; she annoyed me. Despite that, I think I’m part Carrie, part Charlotte and part Miranda and I totally wish I was Samantha! I love that she genuinely doesn’t care what anyone thinks about the way she lives her life – we all say we don’t, but we do. She honestly doesn’t!

    At least we both agree that Big is never the answer :) I was very disappointed that Carrie ended up with him after he let her down (yet again) in the first movie! Can I choose Harry in Aidan’s body please?

    And yup, the 2nd movie was dismal but I’d 100% see a third if they did one ;p

    I just couldnt’ get into ‘Girls’ btw – I think it’s a bit too young and quirky for me (I’m sad that I’ve just uttered those words ;p)

  4. not only am i a miranda, but so are all of my friends. grad school makes you cynical. but you know what? she has a sense of humor, a steady income, and she’s usually the one carrie cries to when she has a problem.

  5. I hate to say it but I too speak in Sex and The City terms. My bestfriend hates it because I always say she’s totally Charlott; not in a bad way, but if you met her you’d see what i mean. As i’ve gotten older i think i’ve gone from feeling like carrie to samantha to end up with Maranda.

  6. So, I refuse to watch Girls because I have no desire to relive my early 20’s on television. No thank you. I would much rather feel superior while watching Big Brother. And you know, get caught up on the depth of potential manipulation. Who does that? It’s so scary they’re so good.

    Anyway, Miranda was rad. I was always between Charlotte and Miranda myself. They both ended up with great partners and happiness, so you know, they learned the right lessons. Like a big closet doesn’t equate to happiness. Substituting 100 pairs of $400 shoes = housing security.

  7. I remember in college my roommates and I used to watch SATC on DVD and have deep, meaningful discussions about who was who. nobody- nobody- ever wanted to be the Miranda of the group. [lucky for me I’m so completely a Charlotte that I didn’t ever have to argue that one]

    I think that Miranda gets a bad rap because when you’re 19 or 21 or whatever you want the drama and the glitter of Carrie, all the men and self-confidence of Samantha, or the money and perfect hair of Charlotte. but when you get a little older you realize Miranda has it pretty good- a funny, caring partner, a YARD in Brooklyn, a kick-ass job, and a cat. she may not be as trendy, but I bet she never gets blisters. [oh, and not even Miranda wanted the pear-shaped diamond!]

  8. You’re a genius Joy! Love this blog, especially these posts! This post made my day, now i got a smile upon my face. Keep on the good work! :)

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