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Joy the Baker’s Cutting Room Floor

August 5, 2009 by Joy the Baker 106 Comments

Dad's Buttermilk Biscuits>

I think it’s important that you all know something about what comes out of my kitchen:  it ain’t all pretty folks.  Not every creation that comes out of my kitchen is pretty, polished and ready for its blog debut.  The reality is that I have my fair share of flops, dropped eggs, burned butter and dirty dishes… I just don’t usually show those kitchen tidbits with you.  Tricky, right?

Today is your lucky day.  Here’s a peek at the flops, disasters and otherwise icky recipes I’ve tried and trashed.

Cutting Room Floor

Chilled Blueberry Soup.  Ok, seriously.  Who are you trying to fool?  This was just an elaborate recipe for blueberry juice.  You tricked me and I resent you Blueberry Soup.  This won’t be soon forgotten.

Cutting Room Floor

Low Fat Chocolate Mousse with tofu.  I think I over whipped the eggs with this little darling.  It was so thick and tough   just all around noooooooot cute.

Cutting Room Floor

Greek Yogurt Frozen Yogurt.  I wanted to love you, but holy heck you were thick and rich.  Too thick.  Too rich.

Cutting Room Floor

This Nectarine Cobbler overflowed… big time… while I was one the phone.  There was screaming and cursing… mostly because I should have known better.

Cutting Room Floor

You were supposed to be a fresh peach scone.  Instead you decided to be a bland peach cookie… that’s just not good enough.

Cutting Room Floor

Ooooh Cinnamon Rolls.  You didn’t fail me.  I love you.

Cutting Room Floor

Chocolate Chip Potato Chip Cookies.  I must have eaten a cool dozen of these cookies trying to decide if they were good or not.  I knew with each cookie that they were absolute rubbish.  Bleck.

Cutting Room Floor

Apricot Scones. Flat and beige Apricot Scones.  Note to self:  figure out how to make scones.  Seriously, how have you not mastered this yet Joy?

Cutting Room Floor

Avocado Milkshake.  Boooooring picture plus do not like.  The photo and taste gods were not with me on this day.  For this, and for all of these recipes that I tried and failed.. well, I suppose I just have to shrug my shoulders and laugh you off.  Thanks for the lessons… and the memories?

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Comments

  1. Rachel

    August 9, 2009 at 10:14 am

    Do you freeze your scones before you bake them? You probably already know this, but it helps them keep their shape instead of melting and spreading.

    Reply
  2. Luci

    August 9, 2009 at 12:47 am

    Oh my god, I love you!
    Not only do you have the most awesome recipes (none of your recipes that I’ve tried has ever flopped on me, ever) but you’re also a human being. I think that’s the best thing about your blog- you don’t try to sound all overly professional and perfect. You don’t mind sharing little weaknesses and mistakes and imperfections with us. I admire your honesty. This is real, this is you and you’re not changing yourself to impress anyone.
    I am so, so, SO glad I found this blog. For reals. ;)
    Thank you.

    Reply
  3. Chrys

    August 8, 2009 at 5:46 pm

    It’s nice to hear about the flops especially from great cooks and bakers such a yourself. Thank you for sharing and confirming that it’s normal to have failures in the kitchen.

    Reply
  4. Meghan

    August 8, 2009 at 11:26 am

    I make scones all the time (though, for the last few years, from a mix). I think they are better a little dry. Then I can plie on the clotted cream (which I do make from scratch) and jam. so good. :)

    Reply
  5. Candice

    August 8, 2009 at 10:41 am

    I grew up drinking avocado milkshake and eating avocado ice cream as a child! Avocados in a savory dish? Still tastes weird to me….opposites eh?

    Reply
  6. Chelsey Green

    August 8, 2009 at 10:36 am

    Love you blog…This post shows how mistakes happen! I made you red velvet cookies the other day, tasted delicious…didnt loook to pretty though :/ any tips?

    Check out my blog!!

    Chelsey

    Reply
  7. jilly

    August 8, 2009 at 9:39 am

    i love this post – i’m new to your site, but just love it. the only scones i’ve made that are consistently light and fluffy (i live at altitude) are ina’s dried strawberry scones. these are gorgeous, although i haven’t yet tried your commentor’s suggestion of smitten kitchen/ci’s scones. those will be next, just to compare with ina’s.

    Reply
  8. Kate D

    August 8, 2009 at 8:20 am

    Wish I could have tried your avocado milkshake! Totally understand your hatred of that blueberry soup — I raged at Gourmet after I tried a watermelon soup that ended up dreadful and making my entire kitchen sticky. Those kitchen failures teach us, though — sometimes more than the successes… Thanks for sharing your flop file!

    Reply
  9. Vicki

    August 8, 2009 at 7:48 am

    I have had such a love/hate relationship with Marth Stewart since a friend gave me Pies and Tarts over twenty years ago because obviously everything she, or her thirty stylists, touch turn out perfect, I didn’t realize I was falling into the same trap with cooking blogs. You are such a breath of fresh air!

    Funny FYI-my little golden retriever puppy chomped the corner of the book while in the book case with his tiny teething teeth. Martha came to my hometown on a tour and I had her autograph this book, because my friend had inscribed “Pull up your bootstraps. Love Martha” when life was teething on me. Martha was not amused.

    Reply
  10. LucyLang

    August 8, 2009 at 6:04 am

    Love this post! I’m glad that better bakers mess up in the kitchen. Last week, while hanging out with close friend and her friends, close friend said to the group “Lucy’s a great baker.” And I replied “Yes, yes I am.”

    Ummm, but then… later that day I massively failed at two muffin recipes. Because of my ridiculously cheap pans and a stove that overcooks, I had to turn the chocolate chip muffins into bread (my safety muffin) at the last minute and my orange poppyseed muffins were too brown around the sides. On top of cooking awkwardly they both tasted bad. I didn’t even know chocolate chip anything could taste bad. *sigh*

    Then this week I was successful at cooking really bland strawberry ricotta cheese muffins to perfection.

    All I want is a good muffin I take to work for a snack! Is this so wrong!?!

    Reply
  11. My First Kitchen

    August 7, 2009 at 6:27 pm

    Great stuff. Kitchen vulnerability is possibly the best kind. And while you can rock out the cakes and cookies and pies, scones are actually one of the few baking things I can do well. If you’re ever in the southeast, I’ll trade you a scone party for… hmmm… pretty much anything you want to teach/cook for me. I know; it’s a tempting offer.

    Reply
  12. Danielle

    August 7, 2009 at 3:39 pm

    Try the Barefoot Contessa’s recipe for cranberry orange scones – they were easily the most delicious thing i’ve ever baked! I promise you won’t be disappointed (:

    Reply
  13. Kerstin

    August 7, 2009 at 2:02 pm

    What a cute post :) Good to know I’m not the only one makes mistakes in the kitchen!

    Reply
  14. The Purple Foodie

    August 7, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    We all have our moments, don’t we? Was fun going through that list. Tofu is mousse? I can never try lot fat :P And potato chips in biscuits? You’re one brave girl, Joy!

    Reply
  15. Carla

    August 7, 2009 at 10:32 am

    It makes me freel good to know that I’m not the only one who makes mistakes or has recipes flop sometimes!
    I have a fabulous scone recipe, though, and I’m planning on sharing it on my blog soon…so please stop by!

    Reply
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