I was so fortunate to be raised by two loving, generous, good-humored, hungry, ball-busting parents. Both my mom and dad taught me a plethora of life lessons that range from real to ridiculous. Oooh man… these parents of mine loooooove a good life lesson. They relish it. My mama, in particular, is full of hearty gemstones for living. She didn’t teach me much about eye-liner or kitten heels… that I sort of figured out on my own (by making soooo many mistakes trying to copy Blossom). Mama-knowledge was more along the lines of ‘you know I raised you better than that, now act right and eat your apple’. The older I get the more I appreciate the woman who raised me… mostly because the older I get the more I realize what a ridiculous youth I must have been to endure. She’s a strong one and I feel blessed to have her.
Mama Says (or heavily implies):
– Do not steal a person’s scissors. More specifically, do not steal my scissors. Just because you see scissors in the house does not mean they’re your scissors. They’re for fabric, not construction paper. Do not make the mistake of stealing my scissors. Thank you.
– We’re going to hem your pants and you’re not going to like it, but we’re going to do it anyway. I don’t care if your friends at school don’t hem their pants. If your friends at school tripped and fell off a bridge because they didn’t hem their pants, would you trip and fall off a bridge too? No. You’re welcome.
– Always leave a place cleaner than you found it. This often means cleaning a bathroom you do not want to clean. Do it… even though you don’t want to.
– No, you can not borrow my calligraphy pens. Thank you for asking nicely. Still… no.
– Be the best of you that you can be.
– ‘Shut-up’ is a bad word. (Joy’s personal amendment: unless you mean it in a good way.)
– Donate everything. Mostly your time and your clothes.
– Happy 12th birthday. I’m going to teach you how to do your own laundry now. That’s that.
– Hand-wash means wash by hand. Follow directions.
– Don’t do it. You’ll get pregnant. You really will… don’t do it.
– Don’t you dare come in this house pregnant if you don’t mean to be pregnant. I don’t care if you’re 31.
– You’re hungry? Eat an apple. You don’t want an apple? You must not be hungry.
– Yes I have Tums in my purse. No, Joy… they’re not candy. Get a hold of yourself. Do you want an apple? You must not be hungry. Again… Tums are not candy.
– I don’t put up with nonsense and I didn’t teach you to put up with nonsense either.
– Doing things you don’t want to do when you’re a kid is really good practice for a being an adult and doing all the things that you don’t want to do… that’s why we’re picking you up from your best friends sleepover party early on Sunday morning and dragging you to church when none of your other friends have to leave early and go to church. It’s ok that it’s not fair. It’s ok that you’re whining. You’re learning discipline and it’s a reeaallllyyy hard lesson to learn.
– Because I said so.
– Be braver than you think you can be. Take my lead.
Mary Brown
Are you at the Nut Tree in that photo in Vacaville…I used to go there as a child….remembering the rocking horses.
Tori
Loved this list. Growing up, my mom’s simple piece of advice to me was this: “Until you screw up, I trust you. Once you screw up, you lose that trust. Don’t screw up.” I find myself repeating this to my stepdaughter on a regular basis. Moms rule.
Ashley
Ah, the scissors! My mom used to get SO mad when I’d confiscated her sewing scissors!
Arabella
The scissors thing. Yes – that scissors thing. That I NEVER understood until I had my own good Ghinger shears and cared about making stuff. And now I understand the scissors thing. And now I say all that same stuff about scissors to anyone in the house who will listen.
You are so lucky to have such a smart, loving, kick-ass Mother.
Elisha
I loved this recollection of your mom – so much of what you wrote is just the same as my wonderful mom.
Relyn
It’s official. I love your mom.
Amy
Joy – are you at the Nut Tree? I think I would recognize those horses anywhere. This post is very sweet. Your mom and did done good : )
Anjali Kahlon
It was a very intersting article but I wish you would increase the font size…I can relate a lot to your mum…if thats ok with you coz she is a lot like mine…you r lucky….make the print darker and the font size bigger ..please
Brenda
Love this! Sounds just like my mama, too! I’m so grateful for having a mom (and dad) who taught me respect, self-discipline, sacrifice, and the value of hard work! I’m an elementary teacher, and let me tell ya…they don’t make many mama’s like that anymore! I fear the future of my little ones who live in a time where immediate gratification and selfishness is valued over the values I was taught as a child.
Jessica Rivera
Hi Joy!! I’m a new subscriber to your blog. I LOVE this post. Sounds so much like the things my mom used to say to me…and I am now saying to my own three kids!! Like you I’m passionate about food…about life. Self-taught….by my parents…and my tastebuds ;) I’m looking forward to reading…and baking more! God bless you
Jessica
Antonette
Thank you for posting this. Such wonderful reminders. And now that I am a mom myself, I appreciate these lessons sooooo much more.
1vivigirl
i’m a new mama and want to be like your mama. she rocks.