[H]ave you met my cat-animal named TRON? The cat previously known as Jules Cat Stevens (an entirely unfitting name for this beast of an animal)? TRON is the fluffy, hungry, lazy, crazy creature I let live in my house. Not only do I let him live with me, but I feed him, well and plentifully. He’s part wolverine, part shark, and cat so he deserves the best (and a lot of it), so I was thrilled when the folks at Beyond Natural Cat Food approached me about working together on a series celebrating my cat! Just let it happen… In the coming weeks I’m even designing the perfect CatLady Gift Set (yessss), as well as tips on how to keep your cat healthy and happy.
Over our four short years together, I’ve gotten to know this TRONCAT very well. He has taught me a handful of lessons about naps, balance, patience, judgement, and good food.
If you have a cat (or pet shark) of your own I’m sure you can relate to one, if not all of the following lessons and nuggets of life advice from TRONCAT.
Thank you in advance for letting my inner CatLady shine.
1. Every time is nap time. That means when the little hand on a clock is on any number, and the big hand on a clock is also on any number… you should probably nap. Go on and get it. Rest is important.
2. You’ve seen your human (that girl who feeds you) MEOW the lyrics to songs. Meowing is universal and especially effective at dinnertime.
3. Here’s why a hiss is effective. It’s understated and reveals fangs. No need to be loud or over the top. Keep calm but show everyone you’re serious. Also… you have claws for backup, but generally an understated hiss will get your point across.
4. Most people are the worst people. Unless, of course, they’re wearing black pants for you to rub your orange fur against… or unless they’re the person that feeds you delicious food.
5. Scratch the people you love LESS than you scratch the people you don’t like… like, a lot less. Also consider throwing your loved ones the occasional cuddle but always end the cuddle with a scratch across the knee. Be nice, but not too nice.
6. Run away from home exactly ONCE. Always come home. Remember, you don’t have to chase the food that falls in your bowl indoors. Your human places it there because she makes good choices and let’s face it… napping takes priority over chasing food outdoors.
photo by Hannah McSwain
7. If people are eating it, it’s probably delicious and you should go ahead and help yourself… or at least try to. Most delicious among the food that humans eat in front of you: salmon, chicken, eggs, sweet potatoes (all actual ingredients in Beyond Natural Cat Food), and occasionally ALL of the pudding.
8. Always let people think they can rub your belly. Put it out there. Play vulnerable and available. Maybe even tolerate a belly rub for approximately 2.6 seconds after which, attack at will. No one gets the belly.
9. You’re allowed to sit in your chair (aka throne) and judge everything that passes by. Mostly what passes by is your lady-human with butter and her camera. She’s ridiculous. Judge her at will… until she feeds you.
10. Landing on your feet is both instinct and practice. Stay sharp, stay hungry.
If you have a cat you know how special (and sometimes terrifying) that relationship can be. They’re sometimes snuggly, sometimes wall-climbing companions that work their way into your heart despite their sharp claws.
This post is brought to us by Beyond Natural Cat Food. No corn, wheat, soy, gnarly by-products, or artificial colors or preservatives. Just the real food I give to TRONCAT to keep him extra sassy, nappy, and wise. To try it yourself, click here!
Megan
Thanks for letting your CatLady flag fly! I love this list and would suggest an addition…
11. Just because you hear everything someone says, it doesn’t mean you need to let them know it. In fact, just ignore it. Make them work for your acknowledgment.
Alison
So true!
Danae
I was simultaneously reading this post and wiggling the pointy arrow thing on my Netflix menu for my furry beast of a cat to try to grab through the tv screen (his favorite game), so this is perfect! Cat ladies unite!
jane
I love this post (and all your posts). I love the freedom to change a cat’s name when it’s just not right. I love the tufts of fur that stick out from between his toes. I love my orange cat even though he’s not rightly named, and hope to find one that fits as well as TRON fits your orange cat. I love that TRON is capitalized. Happy pie week, and hope you get to nap and belly rub occasionally. Sneak it in!
Abby @ The Frosted Vegan
This just sealed in my love for you times 1 million!
ChrystinaNoel
And here I was just thinking it was my roommate’s cat that attacks absolutely everyone. Glad to know this is complete normal…. or at least that’s what I’m going to tell myself now.
Erisa K Hines
i haven’t even read the post yet but your photos of cat warm my heart. oh Joy, thank you for going here today.
Terri
Thanks for the smile today. Love!
Amber
Tron sounds and looks exactly like our Tottenham. Big, fluffy and willing to attack you for trying to show affection. Ha!
Kacie
That picture of Tron reaching onto the table is possibly my favorite cat picture on this planet. It’s the best.
Valiantly Varnished
Haha! Yes I have two furry beast I live with. They are brothers and ironically the little one Declan is the one you should watch out for. We call him the Little Gangster. His brother Finn is just all about the food. And is obsessed with my mother who lives with me. He stalks her and doesn’t like being in any room she isn’t in.
shelly
yes yes yes! so sweet. i wish i could put a picture in this comment because i actually have a picture of my cat wearing a shark costume. he was most displeased but we got some laughs out of it.
sundiegoeats
Love this.
Tron looks like he has Grinch paws (when little tufts of fur stick out in between the toes), haha.
Ashley
Hilarious! I especially love #8.
Jill
Hahah I can relate. Since I’ve been home from work all week recovering from surgery, I’ve gotten to spend way more time with my cat, Josie. I knew she slept a lot, but I’m shocked that she does pretty much nothing else!
Rena
Sounds like your cat is related with our cats :) In fact I learned also a lot and nearly similar things from our cats, especially that every time is time for a nap and that I’m always free to do what I want :)
xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena
http://www.dressedwithsoul.com