Pool Dad Diaries

Hi friends, happy Sunday!

This weekend marks a particular anniversary in my aging journey: my 44th birthday. I can already tell this is the era when I start forgetting how old I actually am, because I nearly introduced myself as 45 the other day without blinking. One thing that truly delights me about getting older is the way our personalities branch off into little side quests. You know what I mean? The hyper-specific hobbies or obsessions that slowly become part of who we are.

As my latest side quest, Iโ€™ve fully embodied a Pool Dad. I clean the pool myself, I buy the chemicals, I have strong opinions about skimmer baskets, and yes, I will confidently explain how to backwash a filter to anyone who will listen. Pool Dad insists that with the slightest hint of sunshine, everyone must get in the pool. And honestly, as a Pool Father,ย  I get it. Chlorine doesnโ€™t grow on trees. (Something a Pool Dad would say.)

So if I can get the pool pH to a peaceful place by the Sunday afternoon, there will be people swimming. There better be. That is both an invitation and a threat.

I hope this finds you happily side questing in your own way. Now, to the link I’ve gathered this week!

โ€ขย  Are you team Make Your Own Birthday Cake or do you prefer to be baked for?ย  I always make my own cake (mostly because the only person who has offered to bake one for me is my girl Suzonne with her famous coconut cake).ย  This year’s cake is but Perfect Chocolate Bundt Cake but My 12 Best Birthday Cakes is a solid list if you have a Gemini to bake for.ย  (Instagram, Joy the Baker)

โ€ขย  This one hit deep. The Gen X Career Meltdown is a compassionate and sobering look at what happens when the industries you built your creative life around vanish beneath your feet. If youโ€™ve ever had to reinvent yourself midstream this is a must-read. (The New York Times gift article)

โ€ข Somewhere between high school and adulthood, I thought friend group drama would phase out. Spoiler alert: it did not. This guide on How To Survive Friend Group Drama, Without Picking Sides is the grown-up strategy manual I didnโ€™t know I needed. BRB, forwarding this to every Real Housewife franchise.ย  (Self)

โ€ขย  The Louvre could never. Texas Monthly makes the case that the real art gallery of our time is… the Buc-eeโ€™s bathroom hallway. Theyโ€™re not wrong. The regional art is thoughtfully curated, highly trafficked, and occasionally moving enough to make you tear up next to the hand dryers: Texas’s Hottest Art Gallery Is The Buc-ee’s Bathroom

โ€ขย  Taylor Jenkins Reid is having a moment – again, and we love that for her!ย  She’s very casual about a mega book deal, half of Hollywood circling her work, and the magic of a so-called “easy read”.ย  ย How Taylor Jenkins Reid Became a Publishing Powerhouse (Time)

โ€ขย  I can see myself eating half of this loaf in one sitting: Jelly Doughnut Focaccia (Substack)

โ€ขย  I’ll be hiding tofu in my macaroni salad all summer! Minimalist Baker’s Vegan Macaroni Salad sounds SO GOOD! (Minimalist Baker)

โ€ข Lucille Ball and Desi Arnazโ€™s real-life ranch was as charming as their TV lives. Think floral wallpaper, game nights,ย  a cow named Duchess, and pool parties with Clark Gable. I love this glimpse of Lucy and Ricky in Real Life (Architectural Digest)

โ€ขย  Tell me this isn’t Pool Dad coded:ย  29 Frozen Drinks That Are Wort the Brain Freeze (Epicurious)

โ€ขย  Ahead of this years Summer Bucket List, here’s a list of adult hobbies worth trying.ย  You had me at “paint thhrifted mugs” which also sounds like getting holiday gifts out of the way, no?ย  (Joy the Baker, Substack)

โ€ขย  Iโ€™ve been watching Poker Face on Peacock, and hereโ€™s the deal: for the first half of every episode, I truly have no idea whatโ€™s going on, and yet, it always clicks into place. Itโ€™s twisty, stylish, a little odd, and really very satisfying. (YouTube)

As we look ahead to Memorial Day, Iโ€™ve been thinking about the quiet pride that fills our little town this time of year. In Bellville, banners of the town’s soldiers line Main Street . Itโ€™s a good time to pause, to honor those weโ€™ve lost, and to appreciate the sacrifice of so many families . I hope your weekend ahead is filled with sunshine, rest, and a moment or two of remembrance.

With love from the pool,

xo Joy

All Comments

I Made This

Questions

18 Responses

  1. I am team “somebody needs to bake my dang birthday cake because it’s my birthday and I am not going to do it.” I refuse to make my own birthday cake. For years, I ate whatever my husband decided to either make and/or buy. My husband dislikes the traditional birthday cake in my family of origin, so I would only get it when my mom would make it for me (and she lives halfway across the country from me). A couple years ago I put my foot down and basically demanded that my husband make it. After all, I frequently make him something with pecans–something I don’t like–for his birthday, so I felt justified. And he did it, with help from the kids.

    BTW, Joy, I have made your Perfect Chocolate Bundt Cake–if that’s the one from your first cookbook–for several of my daughter’s birthdays, because that’s the recipe she most often requests. It really is a perfect recipe.

  2. Buc-ee’s supports political candidates I do not, so I won’t spend money there, but it’s free just to look (or use the bathroom)!

  3. Pool Dad! I love it! I did that stint for a while. We moved to a house in Little Hocking, Ohio, ages ago. It had a pool that had been covered for a decade. It had almost as much water on top of the cover as below. After I fished out the dead mice and squirrels (gross,gross,gross!), and unceremoniously evicted the frogs, off came the cover and I became Pool Dad. I did the fix the filter pump, research the chemicals and all that. I tended that like a baby. Cleaning and skimming. I watched that thermometer for weeks. I don’t remember what time it happened, but the air was so hot, I was doing all my pool work in a bikini (before kids.) I had Mondays off, so I was out there while hubby was at work, enjoying myself. I checked the thermometer and the water finally hit 50 degrees. That sounds warm, doesn’t it, after a long cold winter. So, off the diving board, I went, into the deep end. The shock nearly stopped my heart!!! My whole body went into panic mode. All I could think was how awful it would be for hubby to find me drown in the pool that fine sunny day! In what seemed like a hour, I reached the other end of the pool and crawled out.

    I learned a lot about pools that year. Most importantly, that 50 degrees is not warm enough to swim in! ? Other that that, we really enjoyed that pool. In all the intervening years, we’ve never had another one. Enjoy yours to the fullest!

  4. Happy Birthday Joy – totally with you on the ‘I make my own birthday cake’ plan
    Wish it was pool weather way up the east coast but it will come

  5. Oh my gosh…you Pood Dad personna should be in one of those Progressive Insurance ads that makes fun of young people turning into their parents.
    I have the scenerio already in my head!

    That said, enjoy your pool. You certainly got a LOT for your money when you purchased your beautiful home.

  6. You are a fantastic interviewer. I love the series of your questions-unique, complimenting the person, captures my interest every time!

  7. We stopped at a Buc-ees once on a trip in 2018 and my husband is obsessed! I donโ€™t recall the bathroom art but there is an amazing camaraderie that exists when people wearing Buc-ees merch here in MI see each other in public.

  8. That NYT article about GenX creative career meltdowns was harrowing. At least the food field seems safe — for now at least.

    Joy, have you ever told the story of how you and Will met? I thought it might come up in the blog posts surrounding your wedding, but I can’t recall you ever talking about it.

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