I’m trying to think back to my 18th birthday. Was there a pinata? I hope so.
I’ve never been one to have my life planned out year by year. There was never the plan that I’d finish college (at all, let alone by a certain age), be engaged by 28, married by… what is it, 30? Pregnant or something or other by 32. No. My brain has never worked that way.
It’s not that I’m letting life happen to me, it’s just that the timeline plan was never much my forte. Suffice it to say, I don’t even have my blog posts for next week mapped out, so larger life events… let’s just take those as they come and hope they keeps coming.
Here we are at the ripe, old, healthy, hearty, grateful, trusting, and loving age of 35. And, amen.
I have less wrinkles that I thought I’d have. More importantly, I care less about wrinkles than I thought I would.
I work for myself. I work really hard, past fear and doubt into a place that feels sincere and resourceful.
I feel thankful, deeply thankful with tinges of annoyance and frustration because life is a balance of gratitude and confetti and fear and anxiety.
I think back to five years ago when I wrote a few of the things I had learned after 30 years in the world. I was living in Venice, in love with someone I’m no longer in love with, working the work, trying the try.
The difference between then and now is my commitment to making my own dreams come true. Pointing my finger at the things I want to do, the feeling that I want to cultivate in the world… and going after those things with confidence and compassion.
Because here we are for now and why the heck not?
For my 35th birthday I did something special for myself. I bought myself a pair of diamond earrings I’ve coveted for nearly a year. I’ve never owned a single diamond. This is my first and it feels special because this is something I did for myself.
Fancy. I know.
I got something for one of you too.
Luna Skye makes some of my very favorite jewelry and I’d like for one of you to have this gorgeous GORGEOUS 14kt gold and diamond free form moonstone necklace. A birthday stone from me to you!
To enter this giveaway, find Joy the Baker and Luna Skye on Instagram and follow us. Do this because we’re quality humans and you like what we have to share.
Next, leave a comment on this post giving me a bit of wisdom to carry with me in my 35th year. I appreciate you.
A winner will be randomly selected and comment entry deadlines are this Friday May 27th 2016 at 5pm central time. Giveaway open to residence far and wide.
Remember, it’s about making your own dreams come true- in big life moments, in cake form, in candy, in knowing that inside your heart is the light and confidence to do it, to find you way to shine bright for yourself and the world.
Come on, let’s!
xo Joy
919 Responses
I have to say, these comments and words of wisdom give me such hope and inspiration. The world seems a terribly dark place these days, both on the macro level and in my own little life, but reading these has made me feel reassured.
My advice: Keep on living it up, traveling, treating yourself, and having unique experiences–you can’t take money with you!
Happy Birthday! 35 was such a wonderful year for me and I’m sure it will be for you as well! I’m also not much of a jewelry person, but when I turned 35 I was accomplished in my career, life, etc (though still single) so I did something I don’t normally do – I totally splurged on a Tiffany’s diamond band. A way to commemorate that, heck, I’d made it this far! And nearly 5 years later, I still love that band. I’m all about splurging on “life events” with something special and tangible. Now, I’m about to turn 40 in just a few months….hmmm, I must think what special way to commemorate this event!! ;) x
Your nails are fricken AMAZING. Happy Belated. You are one of my blogger heroes and you get more and more beautiful every year! (not trying to be creepy hahaha)
searedandshameless.com
I keep coming back to this & thinking about it because it is such a beautiful take. Love love you & the anniversary of your birth. Here’s to many more.
I know I’m late on this and the giveaway is over, but I wanted to leave a comment for you nonetheless. I’ve been traveling and have just now had time to catch up with you, so happy belated birthday. My words of wisdom are plagiarized, as I feel much wisdom is. It is beautiful, albeit gruffly delivered. Larry Smith gave a TED Talk in 2011 (https://www.ted.com/talks/larry_smith_why_you_will_fail_to_have_a_great_career?language=en) which is very worth the 15 minutes. In it he says that “you will fail to have a great career unless you fail to have a great career.”
Those words follow me in everything I do. I try not to sweat what I perceive as a failure. Instead, I make sure that I learn something from it. I have failed in many things and will fail at many more. With each failure comes an opportunity for growth and learning and change and resilience. Don’t ever stop.
Happy Birthday Joy! For 35, do not go begin something for the income, do it for outcome. Have a great year
live like every day is the best day ever. I sometimes was so concerned about how I blew it yesterday and what can I do to make tomorrow better that I forgot that today was the very best day EVER!!!
play hookie at least once a month and do something ridiculous, this is way more fun as an adult than it ever was when I was young!
Thanks for this. My advice? Keep being a gift to us women only a few years younger who are trying to be normal about turning 30 in an anti-aging world! x
Happy birthday! Be gentle with yourself. You work so hard and create so many things. You deserve gentleness.
Best
Sally
I’m 35, too (actually only about 2 weeks older than you.) I’ve noticed lately that I really am happy most of the time – I no longer “sink in” to the problem areas in my life. A bad day at work just rolls off me now and by the time I go to sleep it feels like it’s been a good day. I think loving the people in my life more deeply and worrying less about everything else has helped. If I win, I’m giving the necklace to my best friend from college. She loves moonstone.
Somehow I missed this entire post… As someone turning 31 in a few days I would say it may take work, change and rolling with the punches, and perseverance (or tears, whatever) but as long as you are semi-where you want to be you will be radiant. We can’t truly have it all, but that 75-90% range is pretty fantastic.
Happy Birthday, you always seem pretty wise to me already. My word of wisdom? The tough stuff always passes, we make it through. X
I am 10 years your junior and I’ll just say that you are lovable and capable.
The advice I keep giving myself: when the place you live feels boring but you don’t have the chance to give in to wanderlust, slow way down and take the chance to see all the little details of the world around you.
Hello Joy, I’m about your age (two years younger) but my advice is to let the people you love, know that you love them…any chance you can get. I lost my dad two years ago, and he was the man I thought would live forever. It’s hit me hard and I’m constantly wishing I had one more day/hug/conversation/whatever with him.
That’s all I got, except maybe the one I told my coworker the other day… “lots of things can be solved with a donut, so stop and enjoy that donut.” It made her laugh when she was having a bad day, which was all I was trying to do.
Happy Birthday! My birthday is right around the corner as well and going into a new year I’d advise to stay positive and always put things into perspective. Things are usually not as bad as they seem or just escape to the beach (or a body of water) and zone out!
My practical tip is use those mesh bags that produce sometimes comes in to scrub doughy, eggy, or cheesy dishes. Save your sponges. Happy belated!
Happy Birthday Joy! Your attitude and writing are inspiring
I just turned 50 this year and am loving it. My piece of advice: Dont’ wait for others to make you happy. The only one that can make you happy is YOU. Think you’ve probably got this one down pat but it has served as a good reminder for me from time to time.
My piece of advice, and something that I am still working on myself, is to learn to let things go! Fretting and reimagining how things could have gone gets us nowhere. Learn from the past and then let things go :)
ily, ily, ily… I don’t think you understand how powerful your words are to others. thanks for the years of real talk, truth bombs, and words of wisdom. you directly assist in my calming down and carrying on. happy bday, sweet lady! <3
Do what makes you happy and makes you feel fulfilled and don’t let anyone tell you that you don’t know what you want for yourself. (Unless you really don’t know what you want, which of course we indecisive creatures often don’t… but you should be allowed to decide that on your own.)
I love your blog and wish you the happiest birthday ever!
I am same age as you, but I have a very wise older friend: Here’s the same suggestion he gave me: leave every day knowing there is somebody to love, somewhere to go and something to look forward to. Happy B’day!
You’re inspiring to me. Keep up the work (good and bad, it’s part of being human) and keep sharing it. I enjoy reading. You so much, I subscribed to your RSS feed! Thanks!
The mantras that work for you, like the mantras that work for everyone, will change throughout your life–my current mantra, in my quest to be a better human, is to remember that it’s easier (and sometimes more admired) to be clever than kind–but that being kind is much, much more important.
To make honor to your beautiful name, live your life with Joy and share it with us. I’m deeply grateful for your existence which is my greatest inspiration as a baker and as a #girlboss. Hope you enjoy every single minute of it, you deserve it my dear. Bliss, from Ecuador.
First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! And I am SOOO in love that with photo of you and a cupcake! A match made in heaven :)
As for wisdom, you’re much wiser than me, this much I know. My only advice (and I hate giving advice) is to keep making your own dreams come true, just like you said. Treat yourself like an artist and be kind to yourself <3
Happy Birthday, Joy! Time goes so quickly and I know I always have a habit of wishing for the next thing, the next phase of life. Then when I get to that next phase I think back on how simple or wonderful things were back then. So try to enjoy and be grateful for your current situation! And wear the heck out of those gorgeous earrings!
Happy Birthday! I am older than you, and what I’ve learned about life is that is goes on. Happy, sad, silly, bitter, indifferent, etc. we keep getting a fresh new day to try, try again :)
Something my mom always told me that her mother used to say in tough times was, “there’s always someone worse”. Helps me to focus on what I have and not what I don’t have. Also a phrase I have said over and over to my now adult daughters is, “to whom much is given, much is expected.” Happiest of birthdays to you!
Happy birthday Joy!! Thank you so much for keeping on doing what you love – we appreciate it!! x
Eek! Joy, I feel so happy to share a birthday with you! I’ve just (somehow) became a 22 year old (uhhhh one of those ages that I never thought I’d reach but there you go). Difficult and uncomfortable as it may be, I believe it is so important to sit in those spaces that are transitory, spaces which resist stasis and belong to everyone and no one. They force one to be open and available to all the unpredictable, spontaneous “life-ness” which we often shield ourselves from. Roughly paraphrasing Marina Abramovic, whose words have got me thinking recently of this making oneself available to the vastness of possible experience: “To me it is really important to live in what I call the spaces in-between. Bus stations, trains, taxis or waiting rooms in airports are the best places because you are open to destiny, you are open to everything and anything can happen.”
Love to you, it is my birthday wish to cuddle Tron. All of the fur.
Sara x
Just know that the most important relationship you can have is with yourself. Yeah, that’s a direct quote from Beyoncé, because I went to her concert last night and it BLEW MY MIND.
Happy Birthday! I really enjoy your blog. Keep doing you – you are awesome!
Gratitude is an attitude. I don’t subscribe to any particular religious or life philosophy so I just try to infuse everything I do with gratitude and it really helps me push through the fear and the uncertainty of life and focus on the JOY.
If you do your diligent meal prep on Sunday to have healthy dinners ready for the whole week and find yourself wanting garlic bread for dinner instead on Tuesday night after a long day, go for it.
I’m loving being 35! Like you, I’ve not planned my life, but rather just lived it. It’s just been this year that I’ve felt like things are falling properly into place. I recommend you just keep living and enjoying life.
First of all happy birthday Joy! My little nugget of wisdom is as someone still in her twenties’ and is entering that stage of a standard 9-5 job is to not loose your inner-child. I feel the real kind of evil in this world is apathy, where most us fall into a dull cycle and cynicism of the world. So please keep the child-like enthusiasm in your everyday life :) cause we all need a little crazy happiness every now and then.
Keep listening to your gut!
Trust your gut
all the way!
a bit late, but… oh well. here’s my little bit of wisdom. i used to find myself looking back on previous years/stages of my life with disdain, and sort of disparaged the person i’d been earlier in my life, whom i saw as embarrassing/shallow/foolish/etc. but as i get older, i realize there is nothing wrong with each each step along the way–they were where i needed to be at the time, and they were important to helping me become who i am. and anyway, i will keep on growing and evolving.
Happy birthday, Joy! I’d say, spend as much time as you can outside, whether it’s exploring abandoned buildings or going for trail runs or having spur-of-the-moment picnics. And keep telling the people you love how much they mean to you, even if they already know. Enjoy this coming year!
Happy Birthday Joy and congrats on the purchase of your new place! I bought myself diamond earrings for my 40th birthday, and at the time it was the most expensive purchase I had made outside of my condo and cars. I’ve worn them every day since (I’ll be 50 in Dec), from sweats to formal wear they never fail to make me feel good…as you said there is something special and powerful about buying them for yourself.
I was never a big life planner either, I’m single and have no kids and couldn’t be happier…many people don’t understand my non-traditional life choices but they were right for me. My advice to you is simple and a bit cliche but don’t ever settle…from shoes that hurt your feet to people that suck…always trust yourself, If something doesn’t feel right it’s not.
35 looks great on you. Cheers, you and your continued success!
I appreciate you so so much!
Happy Birthday, Joy! Good for you to spoil yourself. I hope this is an outstanding year for you (35 was an amazing year for me!).
One kernel of wisdom I have thought of often throughout my 37 years is from one of my favorite authors, Kurt Vonnegut. He said “I urge you to please take notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, ‘If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.'” Isn’t that the truth? It’s those little moments, not the big milestones, that make up the whole of your life. The more we take notice of them, the more life we have in our years.
Xoxo!
Happy Birthday! My best advice is to remember that nothing is permanent. Enjoy each day for what it brings.
Happy birthday! Wisdom? Don’t worry about the wrinkles…smile more. :-)
ALWAYS SMILE:):):).
I’ve been a big fan of you and your blog for many years. Thanks for all you do!
Joy! I’m bad at advice…but the things I’ve been holding on to this year is this little bit of a poem: “love means to look at yourself the way one looks at distant things. For you are only one thing among many” There’s so much freedom in just being part of the world and remember how little of revolves around me. Love what you do-you be you! :)
Happy Birthday. Spend less time pleasing people and do what makes you happy.
Happy birthday! Always be grateful for what you do have, rather than focusing on what you don’t. That’s what makes me feel happiest.
Happy birthday Joy! My birthday is tomorrow. I’m turning 27. I live in Alaska, but I’m visiting NYC for the first time as my birthday gift to myself. Your post gave me “the feels”. I recently got divorced and life at 27 is definitely not what I planned. My wisdom? to share is that life is too short not be happy.
Some advice that I try to live by is to get outside, be in the present, and enjoy each moment! Happy Birthday!
Oh, Joy, you really are a Joy. Congratulations on your 35th. I recently made it to 73 and still feel like the same me only with even more wonderful advantages, especially in the form of granddaughters!!! Please do keep doing what you do so well. Go through life with a great and grateful attitude and you will experience good things even when they aren’t really what you had planned!! Thank you
Over the last few years I’ve realized the importance of making time for the important stuff. The home renos and the dirty dishes will be there tomorrow, but your loves may not be! That, and buy yourself whatever fancy jewelry you want! Happy birthday! :)
A fella shared with me how his grandmother trains bulls on her farm; As babies she fastens them to a rock. the rock is heavier then the young bull, restraining it to the diameter of the rock. The young bull is not content with its confinement and tries to break free by bucking for a few days or weeks, but eventually sees the futility and calms. As the bull calms it starts to grow, still chained to and restrained by the same rock -the bull grows but the rock remains the same. one day, the bull is a youth no more, full grown and much bigger then the rock, like much MUCH bigger. But the big bull doesn’t try to move the rock. At all. It is resigned to being restrained by an unlovable rock. For the record, if it tried, a full grown bull could pull the rock across the farm.
My advice, never stop bucking. Happy Birthday.
My advice is to be grateful for what you have and not worry about what you don’t have.
I am approaching my 36th birthday and one thing I’ve realized is that life is too short for people that are unsupportive and negative.
I am about a year behind you, Joy. I turned 34 last week. I don’t feel wise enough to offer up advice, but I’ll pass along something my best friend used to tell me back when we were younger and more susceptible to teenage angst: this too shall pass. It reminds me to be grateful and present in the good moments and offers hope in the less pleasant times. I hope that you have a lovely 35th year!
Keep doing you!
Happy Happy! One of the most important things I’ve learned in the last year is this: stretch. A lot. Who knew? Apparently if I were stretching more (in my case, after running) my body would be much happier with me these days. Seems like it could do other people some good too! Hope you have a great 35th year!!
I’m not 35 yet (just a few years out!), so I can’t offer any sage advice from my experience at the age. What I can say is that I’ve learned that true happiness can be found by when “you do you.” Comparison truly is the thief of joy so following someone else’s life path won’t bring happiness. If you’re a planner, then plan. If you’re not, then wing it. Don’t feel like you have to be something or have something that isn’t true to you.
Happy Birthday! Spend as much time with friends and family as you can. Work hard at something you love and enjoy all the little extraordinary moments in each day.
Happy birthday! I turned 35 last September. I never had much of a “life plan”, either, but things have worked out beautifully. I guess that this is the exact thought that I would pass on to you – that things always have a way of working out, even if it seems like they won’t. Over the past few years, I’ve tried to work harder at caring less about unimportant things and spending more time and energy on the things that make my heart full… and worrying less about things over which I have no control. I hope that you have a fantastic birthday. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and humor, as always. <3
Happy 35th! The bit of wisdom that I’ve found is more true than just about any other is also my favorite line from Spinal Tap (!): “There’s a fine line between clever and stupid.” People who know how to walk that line are usually my favorite people!
Don’t worry, be happy :)
A fella shared with me how his grandmother trains bulls on her farm; As babies she fastens them to a rock. The rock is heavier then the young bull, restraining it to the diameter of the rock. The young bull is not content with its confinement and tries to break free by bucking for a few days or weeks, but eventually sees the futility and calms. As the bull calms it starts to grow, still chained to and restrained by the same rock – the bull grows but the rock remains the same. One day, the bull is a youth no more, full grown and much bigger then the rock, like much MUCH bigger. But the big bull doesn’t try to move the rock. At all. It is resigned to being restrained by an unmovable rock. For the record, if it tried, a full grown bull could pull the rock across the farm.
My advice, never stop bucking. Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday, Joy! Be kind – to yourself and to others.
My comment appears to not have posted yesterday, so trying again!
But Happy Birthday, Joy! In my perhaps less-wise life experience of a 30 y. o., I wanted to say that what I have learned in the past 12 months is that, no matter the crisis or challenge, the moment will pass and you will come out standing on the other side. The results may not be what you were hoping for, but you will make it through.
Also, your classic yellow birthday cake recipe saved my 30th birthday when my first baking attempt failed miserably! I was thankful to have a tried-and-true recipe I could immediately fall back on and which, as always with your recipes, baked correctly.
Someone once shared with me how his grandmother trained bulls on her farm; As babies she fastens them to a rock. The rock is heavier then the young bull, restraining it to the diameter of the rock. The young bull is not content with its confinement and will try to break free by bucking for a few days or weeks, but eventually sees the futility and calms. As the bull calms it starts to grow, still chained to and restrained by the same rock – the bull grows but the rock remains the same. One day, the bull is a youth no more, full grown and much bigger then the rock, like much MUCH bigger. But the big bull doesn’t try to move the rock. At all. It is resigned to being restrained by an unmovable rock. For the record, if it tried, a full grown bull could pull the rock across the farm.
My advice, never stop bucking. Happy Birthday.
I hope you had such a lovely birthday, Joy! I don’t have much advice except to be the heroine of your own life. Embrace everything about yourself and follow your heart/gut/whatever guides you always and unapologetically.
I’ll be 30 this year. The advice I have for both of us is just to keep at it – through the bad days in sweat pants and anxiety, with wine and ice cream and cat snuggles, all the way past that to the good days with laughter and friends and funny stories, with wine and ice cream and cat snuggles (because they’re good for both kinds of days, obvi).
My greatest piece of wisdom is to never, ever, ever give up. Happy Birthday Joy!
Hi Joy,
I’ve been following you for many birthdays now- it’s fun to watch people grow and age and change, even if you don’t know them in person exactly. The best piece of advice I think I’ve been given (at least the one I keep reminding myself of) is that whenever you are feel old, or sad, or frustrated or stuck or tired- think of it as a privilege. There are far too many lives cut short before they ever have the chance to feel any of those things, or have the opportunity to do anything about it if they do. Aren’t we lucky we get to wake up, even if we feel like shit on some of those days? Aging is a beautiful privilege, I hope you enjoy all that comes with it. Happiest of days to you.
Hi Joy,
I think the best piece of advice I came across this year was not to label things as good or bad- they just are. Maybe something that feels devastating now will have positive implications later on (I tell you to also remind myself).
Also that chocolate and peanut butter is always a good idea.
Happy birthday!
-Jade
I feel like I still need all the advice I can get, but what I try to tell myself is to always keep trying – daily! – to just stay happy. keep the vibes good :)
My advice: always stop for ice cream.
Happiest of birthdays to you!
Happy Birthday, Joy! I’m not sure what sort of wisdom I have to offer. I’m 37 but you already seem to have so much more figured out than I do! But if I have anything of value to offer, it’s this: Be even more thankful for the struggles in life than the easy times because its the struggles that forge us into our strongest selves; the most important relationship you’ll ever have is with your creator so give that relationship the most commitment; love Jesus like He’s coming today and introduce as many friends to Him as you can.
Be kind to yourself: when you have a problem, think about what you would say to your best friend if they were going through the same thing, and act accordingly. And try to compliment yourself the same way you would compliment a friend. How often do we tell our friends they have an amazing talent, lovely outfit, or pretty smile? And how often do we think that way about ourselves? We’re usually so much harder on ourselves than others.
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday Joy!
I am a little frustrated because I have posted two comments that are not showing up, unless I am totally missing them??
The wise words of some of your readers are telling me not to take this personally though.
Happy Birthday Joy!!
Never underestimate the power of ‘you’. There’s only the one and it’s pretty darn great.
Listen: Eat the last slice of cake. Everyone else just carves around it or leaves two bites, & then you awkwardly have two bites of lemon pound cake left over after the party. No. Unacceptable. Not you. I respect the person who’s like, “I want this last slice of cake. I guess I’m gonna eat this last slice of cake.” Have it. Take it. Work.
Anyways, keep thinking magically, hon. You do deserve it all.
Happy Birthday! You bring so much joy and good food to people. Lots of great insight and living the live. I can tell that much of your life is intentional, and that’s inspirational to me. I hope that you had a great day and that this year is a wonderful one for you. 35 was a year of big changes for me, and 36 (so far) is great!
Keep doing the next right thing to create the life of your dreams!???? Happy Birthday!
Several truths:
1.The older you get, the happier you are to be you.
2. It’s never too late. Period.
3. No one notices what you consider to be flaws even remotely as much as you do.
4. When in doubt, say “yes”.
Love to you, Joy! Happy Birthday!!
Hello! Happy Birthday! You perfectly cook and you have a good blog. Continue in the same spirit! I wish you success and happiness <3
Sincerely, Stacy from http://www.stacyco.com
Happy birthday Joy! Thank you for adding a delicious piece of humour and beauty to my life! The piece of wisdom I have learned in my thirties… The path you didn’t take is gone. But here and now is solid ground you can affect with each small step.
Happy Birthday! The best thing that I’ve learned so far is to breathe. Just breathe.
A home made cookie can make anything better and wear the diamonds every day!
Trust. And be kind to yourself.
Happy Birthday Joy! I love your recipes and your honesty. I also love that you live in New Orleans because your instagram gives me some beautiful views of where my little sister lives! A bit of wisdom that has always stuck with me since I took an improv class in college is to “just show up.” I find that when I show up physically or mentally even if I don’t feel prepared, I often grow a lot, have fun, and surprise myself with what I’m capable of! Much love to you and Tron!
My advice is: stressing over a problem is not required. Either there is no solution to your problem, in which case stressing won’t help, or there a solution, in which case you don’t need to worry because there is a solution
One of my personal favourites is CTFO – chill the f* out. Crude but oh so good for you. Happy birthday Joy, love your work!
Happy Birthday Joy! Can’t believe You are 35! I’ve been reading your blog since before you were 30! Where did the last five years go? I haven’t changed! Lol a good piece of advise is “the squeaky wheel gets the grease!) happy Birthday!
You’ll never be as young as you are right now.
Never allow life to make you bitter. You have such amazing energy that i sense through my screen every time I read your posts. Never loose that.
Happy Birthday! Live to love. Love to live.
Happy birthday, Joy! Although I’m not yet 35 (I’m looking forward to it, though!), my advice would be to hold the people you love very close and learn to let go of negative attitude, vibes, and people in your life. Life is too short to hold grudges against people you care about, and it’s also too short to surround yourself with people who couldn’t give a hoot about your wellbeing. Take care of yourself, and a large part of that means surrounding yourself with positivity and love. Feel free to curate the circle of people and feelings in your life well. I hope it’s a good year for you. :-)
Im currently on the countdown to having my 30’s and to be honest it is starting to play on my mind. I’m doing the usual, get a lot fitter, get the debts paid off. Ahhhh!!! Your post is helping me quiet that side of my thoughts :)
http://www.yankified.com
Life is full of detours, it’s all about making the ride fun along the way because everyone ends up at the same destination.
Happy Birthday.
Be bold. Do something you never thought you’d do!
Happy birthday Joy! One thing I’ve learned recently is when not to say things. Even if I feel a certain way or if someone else disagrees with me…often the right choice is to just not say it. Often it’s not worth the argument/hassle. Excited to read all the advice. :)
Happy, Happy Birthday, Joy! Savor your physical health and cultivate your strength, it will help you as you get older and your body begins to change!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! :)
Happy Birthday, Joy! Your shared wisdom makes ripples larger than you’ll ever know. I’m thankful for you and your work (I love your books, blog and Instagram. :) )
I am turning 35 too shortly, in one month and a few days. From one life-poet to another, I think what continues to hit me is the importance of showing up for yourself… I show up for everyone and am a responsible, dedicated human who is that person who is there for those around her. I’m a full-time teacher and love the students and the school, and am very dedicated to community work and growth, but you cannot be your best self for others without showing up for yourself too. A friend of mine asked me to start doing it years ago and it really stuck. :)
Show up for you and continue to encourage people to do the same for themselves in between everything else.
I do this writing activity every year with my students, and then I also do it every year on my birthday so I thought I would share it with you. The prompts are the same and can always be expanded, the sentences seem to change every year for me. And that’s how life should be. <3
Happiest wishes for you. Wishing you a great year ahead full of sweetness, laughter, and great strides.
Hugs from Philly,
Renee
I think…
I wonder…
I want…
I dream..
I speak…
I act..
I honor…
I cry…
I see..
I feel…
I manage…
I support…
I seek…
I find..
I teach…
I learn…
I am..
I (create your own) _____…
I love…
Happy birthday, Joy! As your junior, the only advice I feel I can offer is that there is never a wrong time for piñatas.
Happy birthday! My morsel of wisdom is- tell yourself the truth. Don’t worry about “what if’s.”
Everything that is bad will lead to good somehow life balances out. Create good karma! You must celebrate your birthday truly because you touch so many from your work. Imagine the limitless possibilities your work has created in so many of our lives. Thank you!
Be what you seem to be. – Thanks Lewis Carroll
Happy Birthday, Joy! You are a blessing to many. XXX
Happy 35th!
I offer you two observations and two pieces of advice:
Observations:
1. You’re only as old as you feel. My 81 year-old father still works full-time and regularly gets asked for ID when he requests his senior citizen discount. He’s such an inspiration!
2. We are always capable of becoming better versions of ourselves. Change isn’t easy, but it is possible. With focus, passion, and commitment, we can continue to grow.
Advice:
1. Be present. You’re wise to skip the life plan. Life is what happens while you’re busy making plans.
2. Say “Yes!” Breathe in every moment and every experience. Even the challenging ones (especially the challenging ones) weave the fabric of your life.
As 40 approaches for me (!), I consider myself lucky to have vibrant, positive people in my life both in personal relationships and through the internet. Thank you for a blog that brings me JOY! xoxox
Dear Joy, happy birthday! In 2011, I bought diamond earrings with an award bonus that I didn’t expect and had no idea was coming. I’ve never regretted it. Thank you for the joy your posts bring to me. –Michelle
Happy birthday Joy!
My advice is to love the life you’ve got, make changes when you are “stuck”, and to put the people in your life (including yourself) first!!!
Happy birthday Joy! Your blog has been a reliable place for mindfulness, yumminess and humour for the past couple of years. I haven’t reached my 35th birthday yet, but based on the relationships in my life I’m (trying) to learn from others. I would say: be present, be grateful & never regret your second (or third) helping ;)
Colette
H to the B Joy!!! Luv ya to the max. You were my first food blog discovery and I’ve been a fan ever since. I baked my first strawberry pie because of you (crusts scared me before then). It got rave reviews from our CFO too. Thank you for all your hard work!
Happy Birthday Joy! I love reading your blog and enjoy your humor and confident honesty. You seem wiser than your years. “Stay hungry, stay foolish.” Wishing the next year to be the best year you’ve had so far!
Happy Birthday! I am a long time fan who is turning 33 in 2 days. My words of wisdom would have to be, don’t think about it…just do it. I’ve learned that after 9+ years in the bakery business! Cheers, Joy!
Thanks for sharing your birthday with us, Joy!
Something to take with you for the next year: remember to be open. You never know what’s around the corner. And, always have a bottle of bubbles in the fridge, in case that something around the corner is worth celebrating!
knitting and coffee make the movie theater way more fun.
I’m 25, which precludes me from giving you any age-related advice. I am a medical student, though, and I was inspired by your note about how hard you work, and how hard you push through places of fear. Medicine has taught me how to work hard also, but it’s also taught me to compartmentalize life and work, to put the books away and take the yoga mat out, to get a real night’s rest, to read a book, to sit and be a human that isn’t trying to be a doctor. There’s so much I don’t know about what the future looks like, and medicine also makes it very difficult to have any sort of plan for the next few years or decades. But I have laughed almost every day, I have people around me who I love, and I hope you do, too. For me, the greatest joy of life has been in the day to day. The living. Not the planning, not the dreaming of husbands or weddings or babies. There’s not enough space in my brain to try to formulate emotions associated with things I have no true control over. So I think you’re doing everything totally right, and you’re the kind of insightful, reflective, strong-ass woman I hope to become.
Belated Happy B-Day, Joy! MANY years your senior, my bit of advice is: the only constant in life is CHANGE…be open to it…accept it in stride, with a smile on your lovely face! Eat what you want, drink what you love, enjoy! Life is too short not to…
Happy Birthday Joy!
(I left a comment Wednesday night around 9:15 but don’t see it so I will send another.)
I want to thank you for your blog. I enjoy it very much.
I also enjoyed reading all of the wonderful words of wisdom sent by your readers.
What an awesome birthday gift to treasure forever. These pearls of thoughtful advice but also
such evidence of your readers’ warmth and affection for you.
I will try to take a few of these mottoes to heart for my own life.
There are several that are so timely for me and I passed 35 quite a while ago.
I hope you have a terrific year.
It’s hard to think of advice for someone who so often shares such wonderful things in this space. I guess I would say to you (and everyone else) believe that your life is precious and beautiful. Happy Birthday!
Ashley
My wisdom: There is nothing wrong with finding heavenly joy in being alone, even when your life is filled with beautiful, wonderful, important kindred spirits. You can be both – hyperactive clown-like in company and a quiet slow-moving turtle at home. And to not compare your life to anyone else’s – your own joy and strength and dreams are the only thing that matter.
Sorry if I am posting twice. My original comment doesn’t look like ti posted. My advise was to live life and laugh hard. Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! My advice is live big! You can never do enough for yourself! Gosh, the necklace is fabulous!
Happy birthday Joy! I am closing of my 35th year, and my wisdom for you is to not worry about all the events and things in your life, and just remember that at the heart of all of it is just you, and always will be just you, in good times and bad. The other stuff comes and goes, and then there’s always just you being you.
Happy BIrthday. May the year ahead be filled with all good things especially health and happiness. Be kind to yourself and others…with practice you can make this gesture almost-perfect.
Happy Birthday! My advice is: “Be thankful and choose joy”
Happy Birthday, Joy! Don’t worry, you got this.
What I’ve learned from Buddhism and experience, 41 years of it, is that nothing is ever about you. And that is both a relief and somehow incredibly disappointing. Happy 35!
I hope you had a fabulous birthday filled with lots of laughter. I am 36, and the one thing I have told myself this year is to stop looking for permission from someone else to start living my life!
Happy Birthday week! Enjoy the second half of your 30s, relish the bone-deep good moments, read more books. :)
Happy Birthday! My advice is something that I tell people often and it’s quite fitting in your case. Not only that, it brings the meaning to a whole different level!
CHOOSE JOY.
Have a great birthday! What a thoughtful way to celebrate.
Happy Birthday! I love that you are dedicated to traveling your path & learning as you go.
Kari
http://www.sweetteasweetie.com
God is good. All the time.
Dear Joy,
Happy Birthday! I think that making sure you spend time doing awe inspiring things, or visiting awe inspiring places, or just making sure that awe is in some way part of your life is the best advice I can give. I wish you a wonderful year.
Liesl
I’ve only been on the planet 27+ years, but I think the best advice is to be true to yourself, no matter who that is in whatever moment you are in. Happy Birthday :) (p.s. i just realized I have been reading your blog for well over 5 years and that is pretty cool!)
Happy Birthday Joy! My best advise to you is actually a quote.
“Listen for the music in all things and life will be a symphony of Joy!”
Wishing you a beautiful symphony,
Leanne
Happy Bday Joy! I’m turning 30 this year and doing a similar inventory of what’s important to me.
My advice is encapsulated by this quote: “Change only the name, and this story is also about you.” What I take from it is that we are all so connected. We all are on a journey together, and if we stopped, paused and reflected on that connection we would all have a lot more empathy for others.
Happy Birthday Joy! Glad you are the compassionate, happy, go-getter that you are! To another 35! (I have no advice because I’m currently just trying to emulate yours!)
Happy birthday from a fellow 35 year old, my piece of wisdom would be – get outside as much as you can. Look at trees. Breathe. Also, eat cake a-plenty!
Happy Birthday Joy !
You look like just the way I wish i will look (and feel!) at 35 !
I’ll be turning 25 this year, so here’s a piece of wisdom from a younger girl trying to find her own path : Don’t look too much in front of you, don’t reflect so much on what’s behind you, just look down and enjoy that the path you’re walking on right now is covered with flowers. (And just get a good drink to sip on!)
lots of love xxxx
You seem so youthful for 35! My advice is to realize how small we all are in the world. The problems that seem so huge to you are invisible to others, who all have their own problems. I think we all need to let go of our own self importance a little. That helped me this week anyway!
Focus on what’s really important and who is really important. Time moves FAST!
I turned 35 in April, so I really don’t think I have much wisdom to offer as only 1 month your senior…so I’ll wish us both a meaningful 35th year.
Do something pampering and just for yourself alone, at least once a week. HBD!
I’m 10 years younger and my general advice is to keep living life the way you’re living it because I genuinely look up to you! Love you, this space, and the real happiness I feel when I arrive at JTB and a new post is up.
Maggie
Here’s my little suggestion … read more poetry. It doesn’t take much time, but can cause a welcome change of perspective, or just a moment of beauty. Happy Birthday.
Do at least one thing everyday that makes your heart sing.
Joy, you have such a fun spirit! My best advice can only be to love Jesus and no matter what happens in life, he has your back forever and always. So much peace and joy, let me tell you!! Enjoy another beautiful year, 35 seems like such a fun age. :)
I turn 35 next year!! What a lovely post – you are living the life Joy :) I would say great advice would be, smile lots, eat delicious food (and cake), spend as much with you can with awesome people, take time for yourself and just enjoy the ride :) Wishing you a FABULOUS 35th year, thanks for having such a great blog and incredible recipes, they always make my day! :)
Happy 35th Joy! I’m 36 and met my now fiance at 35. Since I know you have faith, I thought I’d share some love life advice I gleaned over the last few years. 1) If you’re ever sad to be single the best prayer is “Thy Will Be Done”. It’s so freeing! And 2) I began seeing being single as a choice instead of a burden since I was waiting for God’s best for me (not a perfect man, but a good godly man). It’s like a sacrifice we can put on the altar to show our faith in God’s goodness. Which is a danged beautiful act of worship. :)
I’ve been recalling your 30 posts, as I quickly approach my 30th birthday :-) Thank you for all you share!
Always eat dessert! Literally, because its delicious and figuratively, because life can be hard, and we might as well have the fun when we can. xoxo Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday! I’ll be turning 35 this year too, and while I am an eternal planner, things don’t always go as planned! My piece of advice, walk taller than you feel. Even on a bad day, it’ll give you a confidence you didn’t know you had.
Happy Birthday Joy!
You are a total inspiration to me and many others I know. In whatever you do, just continue to do it with all your heart <3 You have been given an amazing ability to bring beauty and life into this world by the food you create, the pictures you take and the beautiful, true, funny things you write.
Thanks for everything and I hope you have your best year yet!
Lauren
Only 2 years past 35, I feel like I get to know myself better all the time and am learning how to keep things calm by slowing down and keeping a good calendar. You seem far wiser than I, with more adventures under your belt, so my advice is just “you do you”. And happy birthday!
Joy. Happy 35th. Your writing seems to get wiser every year. I think buying yourself a pair of diamond earrings is a boss lady thing to do. I don’t have any advice for you on your 35th, because I think most of the time other people’s advice isn’t helpful. You’ve got to figure out you and make it work for you.
Happy Birthday!
I am not 35, I’m not yet 25, but I had a mentor who recently died very unexpectedly but who passed on a terrific bit of wisdom. He said to never put off living because you think right now isn’t the right time, or you’re waiting for the next big stage because it seems like things will calm down then. Life will always be hard and stressful and there is no perfect time to do anything, but this is the only life we have so don’t waste it. Take time to enjoy things now, because this is the only time you have. I’m about to embark on a grad school adventure and am trying to honor this; I hope you find it useful too.
Happy birthday, Joy! In this next year, love generously. Also, eat ice cream.
Cherish and nurture the relationships in your life. Spend time with those you care about now when you and they can appreciate it. Also, don’t sweat the small stuff.
For you Joy fans, Amazon is offering the digital version of Homemade Decadence for the bargain price of $1.99 as a Kindle Daily special (May 26). I know cooking enthusiasts treasure the hard copy but the digital version is so much more portable.
It’s OK to set compassionate boundaries with people. Being honest about your needs is super important.
It’s okay to not feel happy 100% of the time. I used to try too hard and feel guilty, now I’m okay with the “valleys”.
Three lessons:
1. It is okay to have to re-learn life lessons. That is just how things often work. You are not going backwards, you are just living and being a human.
2. It is okay to feel scared and freaked with uncertainty. Those are some of the hardest times in life, and you are okay. Just chill out a bit. You work hard, and hustle, and stay moral, etc. It will work itself out.
3. It is okay to want to be happy. Sometimes being happy is more important than being the greatest blogger, artist, engineer, doctor. It is okay to want to be good, but not the best, so that you can be happy.
Happy Birthday Joy, dahling!
I’ve been trying to cultivate more patience for myself, in driving, in life things, in general. I wish for you to find that too!
Finding work that you love is the best way to stay passionate and stay young at heart. The necklace is beautiful and I hope I get picked! ;)
35 is great! I got married at 37, just turned 38, and it keeps getting better! I agree: setting timelines for yourself isn’t always the way to go — just let life happen. :-)
I hope I’m as badass as you are when I get to 35! My pearl of 25-year wisdom is to quit worrying about body hair and when you get the chance, say thank you with your whole heart.
Happy Birthday Joy!!!
May all your dreams come true. Live life day by day and enjoy every moment of it!
Cristina
Happy Birthday! Keep doing what you’re doing!
Happiest of Birthdays to you lovely! I am 48 and have found much happiness in gratitude. About 10 years ago I began starting my days by lying in bed when I first wake up and thinking of 20 things I am thankful for in my life. It works to brighten the darker days, glass half full and all that. It is also a nice gentle way to wake up. (Works well when I can’t sleep too!)
Happy Birthday! I miss your podcast terribly. I’m 44 nearing 45. My advice is you have lots to look forward too. Life will get only better. Better friends, more money (hopefully) and a much greater sense of self. Have fun and enjoy the ride.
Don’t change a thing, girl – you’re killing it (at least you seem to be via the interwebs).
Happy Birthday and best wishes for the year ahead! I am just finishing my 35th year and about to head into 36. I think my advice for 35 and as we get older is to keep trying new things and pushing yourself. Where it is education or classes or making a new goal and going for it I think it helps you to keep growing and helps you to stay young. I also love this quote and think it is a great one as come into ourselves – “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson Best wishes :)
Life advice: Take the adventure, but don’t leave your umbrella behind.
Happy Birthday! Exercise and eat what you want (in moderation) – life’s too short to not eat cake. :)
I too turned 35 this year. Turned 35 in April. My advice would be simply this: It took 35 years to look and feel this good. I’m not sure about you, but I haven’t been happier in my life than in my mid-30s :D. Happy birthday Joy!
Dear Joy
Someone once said something to me a number of years ago which resonated so much:
“It’s not what happens to you but how you handle it”
– this person has no idea how this positive statement has shaped my attitude to life
May you “handle” your 35th year with plenty of Joy, delight & gusto as much as you do your blog
– thank you I enjoy experiencing your energy and happy disposition!
Happy Days !!
Wishing you all the best
Warm regards
Hey, I’m 35 too! It’s a year of discovery. But I’d have to say my best advice comes from the book, “The Four Agreements”. I’ve found over the last few years, as long as I stick to the 4 “rules”, life goes pretty well.
1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don’t take anything personally.
3. Don’t make assumptions.
4. Always do your best.
Enjoy!
I read this quote 10 years ago while preparing for a trip to India and it’s stuck with me ever since:
‘What must I say to God when I meet Him? What shall I say to Him for my sins?’
‘I shouldn’t mention the word,’ I said. ‘He’ll be the best judge of your life. If you’ve got to say anything I should say, “You sent us forth into the world incomplete and therefore weak. With my own life, in these circumstances, and according to my own nature, I did what I could to secure happiness. But I did not even know what happiness was, or where to look for it, and it was whilst I was in search of it that I dare say I got a little muddled.”‘ – conversation between the Maharajah and Ackerley (J.R. Ackerley, “Hindoo Holiday”).
Always take the time to savor life experiences—even the small ones. Happy Birthday!
Always make time to savor the experiences in life……even the small ones!
Happy Birthday! Trust your instincts, because they’re good :)
Always have a goal you are working towards. It keeps you moving.
Gifting us on your birthday – how sweet! my advice is to make it a point to reach out to those you want to stay in touch with – even if they aren’t reaching out to you! I’ve really noticed that making the first effort pays off in a big way.
Happy birthday! My advice is to not let other peoples’ fears become your own. Easier said than done, but worth it to just go forward with what you know in your heart.
Saying no is okay and no one should ever make you feel bad about it. I’m 37 & I still fight this one but it’s so important.
Happiest of birthday wishes to you Joy! I love the advice from Mr Rogers to “look for the helpers” in life. I try to be one too but this advice always gives me hope and peace.
Love your words of wisdom! Hope 35 is a great year and that you continue to live for you!
HBD! Pet more dogs.
Happy Birthday! My favorite wisdom is “the measure of a life well lived is not how loved you are, but how well you have loved others.”
First, happiest of birthdays!! I am at the tumultuous age of 24 where I’ve began questioning all things I thought I knew about life. All of a sudden, nothing is certain anymore, and all my new-college-grad-excited-about-the-world feelings have dried up, fast. So I’ve recently decided to take a HUGH leap into the unknown and make a major change in my life. I’m super scared, but more excited than I’ve ever been.
I can’t tell you much that you don’t already know (as you have 11 years of life and wisdom on me). All I can say is that you give me hope and confidence that if I do what I love and work hard for it, good things will come!
Thanks for all the life and kitchen wisdom over the years, I can’t wait to see what’s next!
Oh… I just went to read your 30th birthday post and realized your mom gave you the same advice. I like her style :)
35 I started to be comfortable in my own skin. Accepted who I was and embraced it, and didn’t look back. In regards to this, I offer my mantra from a Zen master, Bunan: “Die while you are live and be completely dead. And behave as you like, and all’s well.”
My grandma always told me “Life’s not fair” when I would object or complain about something. It has helped me push through tough things in life, and instead of dwelling on them, looking at how I can solve the problem or the silver lining, or what to do next. That has always stayed with me :) Happy Birthday to a strong, independent woman! :)
Granted I am only just 30 (you have 5 more years of wisdom on me), but something I’ve become very aware of in the last year is that we will always regret the things we didn’t do more than the ones we did. Not dying your hair purple, not wearing certain things because they aren’t “appropriate” for one reason or another, not taking that class or going to that event… So I have been doing my best to say yes more often to things and experiences, and I haven’t regretted it yet.
I followed both! Thank you for the give away!
Advice: Just be thankful for what you have each day, not for what you don’t have.
Don’t forget to keep on finding the joy in small things
Man…after reading this post I’m convinced you don’t need any wisdom from me to carry you through this year because you are the one sharing your wisdom with me! A very inspiring post (as always)…But I want to enter the giveaway, so…I guess just listen to yourself because you are a wise soul.
My best piece o advice is to live the life you’re living. Don’t wait to do things “once you lose the weight” or “once you meet the man”. Life is happening now! Happy Birthday!
I turned 35 this year as well. And, so far, it’s been kind of weird. However, I have to admit that I feel more comfortable in my skin. More sure of what I am all about (and what I am not about!). Just love yourself. Truly and completely. The rest will follow.
It’s okay to sometimes step back and take a deep breath before plunging back into the crazy frenzy of life!
Happy Birthday Joy :)
-Julie
And this is why I follow you. Because of the food and this. Yes, let’s! Happy happy birthday.
Happy birthday, Joy! I am five years your junior, so perhaps a little light on wisdom, but the past 12 months of my life have given me the knowledge that, regardless of the size of the challenge or crisis, you will get through it. The result might not always be what you hoped, but the moment will pass and you will be on the other side.
I am twice your age. Looking back my advice is truly own each minute and embrace the experience. These are the only sure memories we will have. Wishing you a great future. Rosemary
Make sure to balance work and personal time wisely. There are so many things would have liked to do in my 30s that I kept postponing. Getting close to 50 now, I realize I’m no longer interested in those things…I should’ve done them at the right time…
My mother always tells me ” You have already arrived” . Do not try so hard to arrive, you have already. I try to begin each day with that mantra.
The two pieces of advice that always spring to mind for me are both pearls of wisdom from my dad. When I was little, he said “dishonest people will always be found out” so i try to be as truthful as possible. Little white lies to save feelings aside, I try to own up and take responsibility when things go wrong rather than hiding away. Its a hard but good motto to live by.
And when massive tasks (like my university dissertation) come up, I think of this one “This piece of work is like barbecuing an elephant. It is best done in small chunks”. It simultaneously makes me laugh and also reminds me to tackle things piece by piece if it starts to feel overwhelming.
Happiest of birthdays Joy, I still look up your wisdom from your 30th from time to time when I’m having a meltdown. You’re cool.
https://victoriaspongepeasepudding.com/
Please keep sharing your voice through your blog!
I’ve been surprised by my mid 30s, it feels great to be this age. My “advice” as such is don’t worry if your life doesn’t look like you imagined it would. I love chasing my dreams, travel and nursing, and not what people seem to think I should want, which it turns out is usually babies.
stay true to yourself. dress up on halloween, eat cake for breakfast. get a tattoo. Enjoy life to the fullest.
Happy birthday Joy! My advice is to choose a few great books to read this year (or more than a few if you have time) and keep a list or journal of what you read. Nothing makes me happier than feeling I enriched my mind with great literature! And it makes you a better, more empathetic person to boot!
Give to yourselves just enough that you have plenty to give others…
Happy Birthday! Something I’ve been learning this year and would share with you- have the courage to look at the lies that you believe about yourself, see them as the lies that they are, and let the Lord teach your heart the truth.
Since I am turning 40 in a few weeks, 35 seems young to me, but I remember thinking 35 was an old sounding number when I turned 35. You have a lot of wisdom and perspective on aging which I think comes with having a grateful heart and appreciating the beautiful and not so beautiful moments in life. I feel as though I am more accepting of turning 40 than I was of turning 35. Maybe I have a more grateful heart than I did then. I have three beautiful children plus one on the way (I know at almost 40!, crazy, but thankful. God is good!) so a lot to be thankful for. Happy Birthday! Each year is filled with new experiences, people, and moments to treasure!
Happy belated birthday! I loved this post. And I love those earrings, I’m glad you treated yourself. The only wisdom I know is that you should define your own success.
My words of wisdom after almost 45 years is: don’t worry about it!
Happy Birthday Joy! Live every day to it’s fullest and savor every little thing!
Always carry peace with you and spread love wherever you go :)
At 47 now, fast approaching 50, and my advice is enjoy it all. You earn every year, and each brings its own joy and even maybe some wisdom. I hope I can enter the next decade with grace, wit, and, yes, lots of confetti. Or maybe glitter?
I’m looking forward to 35, something I’ve realized and have tried to live by lately is just being kind. I think the world could use a LOT more kindness.
every day is a gift
Happy birthday!! I cannot claim these words as my own, but I can say they are words to hold on to and live by. Run wild. Live Free. Love strong. “Run wild. To risk everything. To hold nothing back. To lay it all on the line- your reputation, your success, your comfort. It’s that moment when fear is overcome by faith. Live free. It’s not the liberty to do whatever you want whenever and wherever you want. But rather it’s living in accordance with the Author of humanity, and finding freedom by connecting with the Creator who conceived you. Let the light flood into your eyes for the first time, feeling the blood course through your veins, finding the truest version of yourself by knowing the One who knows you even better than you know yourself. Love strong. Because you were first loved. Because without love, we all perish. Because the earth and the stars can and will pass away, but love, love will always remain”
Happy, happy birthday Joy. If I could impart one piece of advice it would be to live every day, the good and the challenging, with a sense of gratitude. I know from experience that one’s life can be turned totally upside down in an instant and when least expected. You can be thrown totally off balance but if you are anchored in gratitude, no matter the circumstance, you will right yourself and sail on.
I hope that kitty of your has a special gift for you!
It’s a wonderful thing to be reminded by you, that we are not in control of what happens in our lives. Things change and people come & people go. You have been given gifts and have been given the desires of your heart. Now, you live with such joy and spread that to others by doing what you love to do! What a wonderful life!
-Elise
Happiest of 35 to you!
Think in 10 year time frames. I check myself, my goals, my actions, with this…”what if I knew I was going to die in 10 years.” 10 years is enough time to get to it. A week means seeing some friends and making a killer sundae. 30 years – no urgency. 10 years really helps me check myself. Life is now. “Get busy living, or get busy dying.” (Name that movie!)
Thank you for the constant inspiration!
Take 10 minutes out of everyday to find the beauty in your life and give thanks.
I just turned 32, and my husband just turned 35. Our advice? The thing you ache to do… just do it. Even if it’s a little scary or impossible.
35 was a great year for me! Wishing you the best, and I will leave you with one of my favorite Rumi quotes:
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.”
Happy birthday, Joy! My piece of advice is…. stop looking forward to things! No more, “two days til Friday” attitude! I catch myself in this thought multiple times a week and have to remind myself how lucky I am to have this day. Even if it’s a Monday. :)
Remember to be grateful for the little things, and smile – it brightens your day and people really do smile back. Listen, to both yourself and others, it can be so easy to neither well!
Happy Birthday – Carpe Diem!
Selina
Happy Birthday! Just keep doing what you’re doing, because you’re a rockstar.
Oops, I guess, my comment got lost on the way – sorry if I’m posting twice! Wish you all the best! As I’m only 22, it doesn’t really feel appropriate to give you any advice on life, haha. Still, there’s one thing I’ve already learnt: always work hard and give your best, but don’t forget to take some breaks and enjoy some time for yourself! ;) Happy Birthday!!
Bake cookies when you’re happy, sad, mad, tired, bored, etc. Making cookies always makes me feel better no matter what mood I’m in, and it makes everyone else happier too.
The days, weeks, months, years pass faster than you would ever think. The big moments are great….but the little ones, they are truly special. Relish everyone as often as you can. Oh, eating chocolate at 2am is still awesome at 42 :)
Happy Birthday! My advice is to always do what’s best for yourself, even when it’s hard to decide what to do. Deep down, you’ll know.
Seems like you don’t need advice – you are doing alright! But I will offer this: we should all laugh as hard as Chewbaca mom more often :)
Happy Birthday Joy!! From a fellow, 35-year-old girl who loves to bake – two pieces of advice:
a) “Leave the gun, take the cannoli”. Usually, I don’t go to the Godfather for wisdom, but taken metaphorically, I think there’s a lot to learn here : )
b) On a more serious note, from the real Father who has all the wisdom – Matt. 6:33. Look to Him and be about His business first, and He’ll give you absolutely everything that you could possibly need!
Lotsa love and cake (baked by someone else!) to you,
xo
Julia
My advice: relationships shouldn’t be hard work. Do what you love, even if you have to work at a job to do it. Avoid toxic people. Don’t worry about what other people think of you. Spend time outdoors when you can. As Nora Ephron said, “Wear a bikini every day because you won’t have that body thirty years from now”.
Last week in yoga, the teacheR said, “lead with your heart”. It was great guidance for that pose and also seems like a great way to move about life.I hope you have a very happy birthday!
Live the life you have now to its fullest and enjoy where you are in life rather than being unhappy because you don’t have x,y and z
I love how you seem to write about yourself with greater compassion and grace – keep that up! :)
Very Happy 35th Birthday! Know that you are getting better, smarter, sexier by the year. You are coming into your own fullness and be very excited to enter your forties….best decade of my life yet!
I’ll be 35 this September and while I’m not older or wiser here it is – just when you start to feel old put your age into context. I often start thinking of how old I am but then quickly think whoa whoa whoa. This is my golden age! Wait til I’m 50, 60, 70 + and I’ll think back to where I am now and finally appreciate the moment :) happy birthday!!
Continue doing what you’re passionate about: this is what you’re best at! and what will make your life fulfilled
Happy Birthday Joy, thank you for all the recipes I’ve tried until now. Not one single disappointment.
Wow 35! And you are already doing it all…loving chocolate..baking…sharing…my advice? Continue being true to your soul and more chocolate doesn’t hurt :-)
Eat cupcakes, drink gin and take walks in the rain.
My only advice is to spend as much time as you can with those that you love. As you get older time to yourself can become more plentiful and then you’ll treasure the memories you’ve made with those you love.
Happy birthday Joy!! My best piece of advice is to learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable. So many new things in life are wildly uncomfortable, but ultimately turn out to be very good. As I’ve learned to just be okay with being uncomfortable, I’ve been able to open myself up to opportunities that I would otherwise have fled from. I hope you have a wonderful 35th year and I’m hoping that you’ll do a book tour stop in SF for your brunch book so I can meet you then!
Happy Birthday, Joy! I remember your 30th birthday post, feels like yesterday! You’ve done so much with the last 5 years, you should be so proud. Your creativity, authenticity and charm touch the lives of many (and the cookies don’t hurt). I’m not commenting for the diamond, just wanted to say happy birthday and send sincere wishes for all of your current dreams to really come true, and for new (even bigger) dreams to materialize. I look forward to reading along as they do. My words of birthday wisdom are “leap, and the net will appear”. Squeezy hug!
Happy birthday Joy! I was listening to Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Magic Lessons” podcast where she interviews Brené Brown that has stuck with me. They were discussing failure and taking risks and Brené said “I don’t jump or leap for the landing. I leap for the experience through the air. Because you cannot predict the landing.” I feel like this is the best life advice. Since we can’t ever predict the landing, why not keep leaping?
Happy Birthday!! I have been reading your blog for 5 years and it always brings a smile to my face. Keep spreading your infectious personality :)
Joy – love you, your style, your flair, your writing, your recipes. Thanks for making me laugh. Here’s my advice to you on your birthday: learn RIGHT NOW that you ALWAYS have all of the happiness inside you. All of it. Your set point is inside you. No matter who you choose to hang your life with, what friends, children, partners, co-workers you may have, you will always need to create your joy from the inside out. No one can give it or take it from you. You’ll need to create and re-create it always, for yourself, possibly ALONGSIDE others but it will still be yours within you. All the best. (Happy Birthday dear Jooo-oooyyyyy, Happy Birthday to You! And many mooooooore.)
Happy Birthday!
So my piece of advice? They can’t eat you. Weird right? Not really… don’t ever be afraid of anyone or anything because they can’t eat you…
I will turn 35 in December, I’m actually excited believe it or not! I’ve learned (and have to remember) that comparison is the thief of joy. Happy birthday! Followed on instagram under alabasteranna
My wisdom is that the only things you get to take with you are those which you give away. May your 35th trip around the sun be the very best yet.
Happy Birthday, Joy! Looking back at 35 (since I’m only a few years older), I would suggest that if there’s something you want to do or something you really want for your life – be it big or small – try to find a way to do it now or soon. We all have this inner voice saying “someday”. Don’t listen to that voice. Why wait. Go for it. Also – totally unrelated – I’d love to know where you got your gorgeous top (or is it a dress?)! Enjoy your day, and thanks for the endless, delicious recipes!
Emmy
Happy birthday, Joy! Not sure if I’ve ever commented before, but I’ve been reading your blog for the last several years + started listening to the podcast when I moved halfway across the country a few years ago (watching and listening to you and Tracy has made me feel like I’m getting in “girl talk” time when I’m a thousand miles from my best friends). If there’s one thing that this move + phase in my life has taught me, it’s that you have to do what YOU want and know to be best for YOU. You seem to be pretty good at “doing you” though, so I’m pretty sure you know that one. Anyway, it must feel really weird to have millions of people read your words + reflect from their own perspectives, but thanks for all of your wisdom and inspiring words over the years.
You are wonderful. I’m turning 30 in 3 days and have been having many of these same thoughts. The biggest lesson I’ve learned in the last year is about choosing joy. I’ve spent a lot of time being sad and passively waiting on joy to find me and transform my life. You have to be an active participant in your life! Happy birthday!
I’m only a couple of years ahead of you here, so my words of wisdom might not be all that profound. I found myself unexpectedly down when my 36th birthday was approaching, because I was on *that side* of 40. I’ve been learning that the march of time is fast and unstoppable, and the best you can do is up your self-care game (sunscreen! vitamins! massages! lady dates!) and just succumb to it. Happy Birthday, and good work on the diamond earrings! :)
Happy birthday!
I am turning 40 this year (yikes!) and these are my words of wisdom. Life is too short to wear uncomfortable underwear.
Have a wonderful year!
Happy Birthday Joy! I wish you all the best for the year. Something that has helped me recently is being in practice and pursuit of grit, being in deliberate practice of the things that are hard toward a higher purpose. For me, that has mean taking time to pursue groundedness and forgiveness. It has been extraordinarily difficult, and has come in inches and cm rather than miles. I encourage you to seek your passion with deliberate practice, and remember that the worthwhile things many times come very slowly.
With gratitude and care,
Patrice
My dad always says, “anything worth doing is worth overdoing.” It’s one of my favorite bits of wisdom.
Happy 35th! That was a big year for me, I decided to go on a vacation with a group but by myself. I had taken scuba diving lessons and went with the group to become a certified diver. Lo and behold I met my future husband on that trip. Sure wasn’t looking for that, but funny how life works! My advice would be to keep doing what you are doing, I’ve seem to have lost a bit of myself, but I think everyone needs to keep asking themselves who they really are, and try to stay true to that. It sounds like you are doing that already! I wish you a wonderful year, and thank you for making ours better.
My advice is: Men ain’t shit.
Happy Birthday, fellow gemini!
:-)
Happy Birthday, Joy! You seem to have it figured out–just keep doing what you are doing. Follow your passion and enjoy each day!
Happpy Birthday!! I hope you have the best day ever and remember time goes so fast celebrate each day!
Happy Birthday! I hope you have a great year. My advice would be stop comparing yourself to other people. It not worth keeping up with the Jones.
I think, based on your last Monday post, that you already know this, but be nice to people. A genuine ‘thank you’ goes a surprisingly long way. Also, dang you for introducing me to Luna Skye.
I always cross the street to walk in the sunshine. Life’s too short to spend it in the shade. Happy 35th!
be thankful for every little thing! you never know how much the simplest of things mean until they’re gone
Happy birthday, Joy! What an amazing giveaway!
Okay, here goes. Yesterday my mother called me in a panic–her friends were coming over to watch Game of Thrones and she’d accidentally put the Roku remote through the wash. She’s got this 1st generation iPad though, so we went through step by step over the phone trying to figure out how to download this app to control the Roku. We had to reset her Apple password, then she couldn’t find the credit card that was on her app store account. She was beside herself upset at each step and kept saying the whole night was ruined. Half an hour later the app was downloading and her friends walked through the door. I heard her tell them what she’d done and they all started laughing. She told me she loved me, they’d figure it out, talk to you soon. They stayed up all night watching GoT and I got an email the next morning…”I think I like the iPad remote app better than the controller!”
VERY long story short–the advice I’ve been telling myself recently is that a lot of times, things work out just like should. It’s a realization that never gets old :)
Happy Birthday Joy! You inspire me and brighten each day that I read one of your posts! I am only 21 so I do not know how much wisdom I really have to share but generally I think it is important to work hard doing something you believe is meaningful, do more than you think you can for those you love, and when the opportunity arises, always dance on the tables
I’m only 20, so I’m sure I can learn from you much more than I can teach, but I would say keep listening to Drake and making amazing cakes with his lyrics on it. Your passion project is pretty much my favorite thing ever!
Happy birthday to you! The best birthday wisdom I have is from my 90-something-year-old friend: “You are never too old to learn something new, as long as you work hard enough!” :)
One of my favorite pearls of wisdom is in Spanish: “lo que no mata, engorda”
It means “what doesn’t kill you makes you fat” and is used to basically encourage you to try new things and be adventurous because the worst that can happen is you get kind of fat (assuming it doesn’t you know… actually kill you…)
Happy Birthday Joy! 35 will be awesome!!!
Happiness is not getting what you want; its wanting what you get. I think about that a lot when I need perspective. Happy birthday and thank you for not being boring. :)
Happy Birthday!! In this next year, believe in the little things!
I’m younger so not sure I have any wisdom you havent already found, but my own lesson I continue to learn is to take a deep breath and slowly let it out, fixes a variety of ills
Happy birthday. A simple thought that can be taken as advice, never go to bed angry, whether at family, friends, significant others or most importantly yourself.
Always be kind.
Happy birthday Joy! I’m not at 35 yet, but the past year has taught me that you’re totally right – planning your life out doesn’t usually work out, so better just to go with the flow!
Happy birthday! Hmm… I suppose my advice is quite basic: do what makes you happy with whoever make you happy. Don’t try to confirm to other people’s expectations for you – that’s a quick route to an unsatisfied life.
“I work really hard, past fear and doubt into a place that feels sincere and resourceful.” Love this. I’m right there with you, and offer no advice other than what I tell myself: you can’t please everyone, you are not pizza.
Oh goodness, I get most of my advice from you, so I doubt I can contribute much wisdom beyond your years. I do know we’re both gemini’s, and both appear to be introverts (maybe), so my advice to you is that it’s ok to say no. It’s ok to decide a Great British Baking Show Netflix marathon is your plan for the night if you feel like it, because you’re worth it. And I bet your couch is amazing and just calling your name to snuggle in. So say no sometimes to other people. Or tell them you’re free, as long as your couch is part of the deal. Can we all tell that I’m just dreaming of laying on my couch? Haha, happy birthday Joy! Hope it’s wonderful ????
Don’t doubt your intuition.
Oh Joy. The world is a better place because of you and your sprinkles, and gratitude and fear.
My only piece of advice is something my Mama taught me through her own graceful approach to those around her and her life: be kind. Be kind to others, be kind to yourself. Be kind when it’s the last thing you want to do because those are the moments it matters the most. Happy 35th Birthday Joy. You shine bright like a diamond, and you totally deserved that gorgeous gift you gave yourself :)
Happy, happy birthday! At almost nine years your junior, I don’t have a whole lot of “wisdom” to add, but I will say this– the more donuts you make, the happier the world is. So keep spreading the love!
Continue to decorate your new home with things that bring you joy. If they aren’t unpacked yet, chances are you don’t need them.
Happy Birthday Joy!
I enjoy reading your blog but today I really enjoyed reading your fans’ comments.
I will definitely take to heart several of these very sage readers’ words of wisdom.
Thank you.
I hope you have a wonderful year.
Love yourself and take care of yourself. After all, you only have this one body and one heart in your whole life.
Advice: wear comfortable shoes! Always
As all of my friends are in their 30s and we’re approaching 35… my advice is to let daily stresses go. Let it be and keep living.
Don’t believe everything you think! Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday, Joy. My only words for you would be something I think you’re already doing–do what makes your heart sing. 35 is s great age, so be present and enjoy each day.
Elizabeth
Happy birthday! I really enjoy your blog. Life is better with (more) sprinkles!
My birthday advice is to wish for things all year long and give yourself compliments daily.
Happy Birthday!
Jill
Do what feels good. Not like how eating garbage food makes you feel good for a second and then awful, but what genuinely feels good in your bones and your soul.
Happy birthday Joy!
35 is a great year. One where you hit stride and embrace the boldness, fierce beauty, and strength that resides within. More than anything my wisdom is have courage and be kind. Regardless of what happens, in business or in life it is one thing that has always gotten me through.
Melissa
https://www.glistenandgracedesign.com
My advice for your 35th year… be kind to everyone! Nobody has it easy. Pray more, worry less. Only eat good chocolate. Take care of your skin! Be a good listener.
joy — 35! maybe the wisdom is in accepting things as they are right in this moment – cat hair, dirty dishes and all – and participating in all of it without being too attached to one outcome or another. self-love and gratitude and light. xo
Happy birthday! The guy who sat at my desk before me at my last job left a piece of paper taped to the desk when he retired that said “What I do today is important because I am exchanging a day of my life for it.” I took it with me when I left the working world to be a stay at home mom, because I wanted a reminder not to wish my life away (wishing for bedtime, wishing for the weekend, wishing for vacation.) Try to find meaning in the small, mundane stuff because that is most of life.
I think the best advice I’ve been given, though in a different context, is great because it’s so simple: “just be patient”. Happy Birthday Joy!
Happiest of birthdays, Joy! I took a pie class with you at King Arthur a few years back and you gave me stellar advice on off the beaten path NOLA food–so that practically makes us friends!
I just turned 35 in April — so far it’s been great. The advice I’d give (even though I think you already abide by it) is just be you. 35 isn’t 15 (thank goodness) and life’s too short to be anyone other than yourself. and if that means the skinny, heavily makeuped gal at the gym thinks your a nerd, you don’t want to be her friend anyway!
Enjoy your day, your new house and your coming year!
Happy Birthday! My advice is taken from someone else: ‘If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.’ from Roald Dahl
hmmmm, I have no piece of wisdom for you,but I will tell you how much I appreciate your blog. I’ve been reading for years and I love your food, humor, wit, and writing style. You are someone I look up to, so stay strong, girl!
There are people who make you feel like you fill your own skin just fine, and there are people who make you feel like you are only the raw edges of yourself that you need to smooth out. Spend time only with the former!
Happy birthday! I’m not yet at 35 but in 28 years I *have* learned that when people tell you they hate drama, there is a 100% chance they love drama. Oh, and also to buy a pack of peanut M&Ms before the movies and pour it into your bag of popcorn.
Happy birthday, Joy! Life advice that I bet you already know – say YES to things.
Just this: It isn’t true that if you work hard and are kind, only good things will happen to you. Sometimes you do everything right and your heart still gets smashed into a million pieces by the universe. Sometimes so much that it seems orchestrated. But it isn’t orchestrated. And it isn’t related to your performance. Life is wild and unfair and beautiful and sometimes exquisitely painful, but so sweet; the best part of it is loving and allowing yourself to be loved, in joy and in deepest sorrow. You cling to what you can, you fight as hard as you can. You celebrate every little thing and you hold on until the joy comes around again. You’re doing it right. Happy birthday!
Treat yo self! But also save for retirement :)
Happy birthday! Here’s my advice – life is too short for uncomfortable shoes or cheap toilet paper.
I have enjoyed every new year of life, and am feeling ever more comfortable in who I am! Just enjoy!
My advice, and I’m just a few years your senior, is to do the things that scare you.
PS- Happy Birthday!
Joy, life can be tough and men can be complicated. Remember that rough seas never made a skilled mermaid:) Happy Birthday to you!!
“I am whatever you say I am, if I wasn’t, why would I say I am.” – the real Slim Shady
Happy birthday Joy! my mom always told me “what goes around, comes around”. She usually meant it in a negative way, but I like to think of it as “do good things and good things will come to you”!
Joy – be true to yourself and follow your inner muse; spend time with Mother Nature as often as you can and listen to her advice; promote peace and make love, not war. :-) A very Happy Birthday to one of my most favorite bloggers!
Vicki
Hi Joy! Happy birthday. I think my only advice would be to continue being yourself–because you’re amazing.
Happy Birthday Joy!
Keep in mind that sometimes you need to step outside, get some fresh air and remind yourself of who you are and who you want to be.
My wisdom for you is to take a solo trip soon! Treat yourself to time, solitude, and endless walking. Leave your phone at your hotel/hostel/house and just wander.
35 always scared me. I blame Sex and the City and Charlotte’s ‘thirty-faux’ birthday in Atlantic City. But looking back, the best years were ahead of her! She met Harry, adopted Lily and had Rose – all after 35. So here’s to 35 and everything that brings with it!
Happy Birthday Joy!! When I am worried or looking for direction in my life (so about six times a day) I always think of an Audrey Lorde quote – “When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.” It has helped me with the big things and the every day things. So my advice is to always ‘dare to be powerful’ which I think you are already super awesome at doing!!
Advice? Be gentle… Just was listening to a sermon on gentleness and the power it creates to make another flourish!
Always have a really, really good red lipstick. Nothing too fancy, nothing too cheap, but it can perk you up like nothing else. (This coming from someone who wears nothing but the occasional swipe of mascara.)
Happy birthday!! <3
Really enjoy the small things in life. Sleep a LOT, drink delicious coffee, and keep following your passion! Your blog inspires me to follow my dreams every single day.
im 42 and besides sunscreen aand md moisturizer is to just appreciate what you have right now amd who you love and who loves you. it also took me this long to really love my body. relax every day if you can like stare out the window stuff
happy birthday i age your cookies last night!
To quote Helen Keller “the best and most beautiful things in the world cannot been seen or even touched….they must be felt with the heart.” Hoping your heart will feel something beautiful every day of your 35th year.
Happy birthday, Joy!! My advice is know when to say sorry and when you truly have nothing to be sorry for.
Also, always have bourbon on hand.
Happy birthday Joy!!! As someone younger than you I don’t know how qualified I am to give you any advice, but something I always try and do is live with balance and moderation. Working hard is good, but sometimes dessert and bad TV and online shopping can be even better:)
Happy Birthday! My advice: smile; even when you don’t want to, it will make you feel better. Also, the wrinkles that come with smiling are worth it.
My father had a retort when anyone would ask him how he was, it went “Never had it so good”. And he meant it. He grew up in a coal mining town, no running water, no electricity and ended up in California living a good life. He was happy. ever optimist and loving. I was a lucky person to have him for a father. So when people ask me how I am I’m honoring to say “I’ve never had it so good!”
Happy Birthday! At 41 one I am happy to say I love my life. There are moments I don’t enjoy, but in general I wouldn’t trade this life for another.
My bit of wisdom for you is the same I give my 23 year old daughter and all my friends. To make the most of every day and make sure your decisions are from a combination of heart & mind.
Do what makes them happy ONLY if it makes you happy. Take the risk, but only if you want to. Never “settle”, because you have to. Get married, don’t get married. Have kids, don’t have kids. And you don’t have to get married to have kids. Only you can make those choices.
Be the person/woman/friend people respect and look up to. Always be exploring, learning, and growing or you will be stagnant.
Have a wonderful year!
For your 35th year, remember that you are a quality human that deserves the absolute best. Thank you for sharing your infinite wisdom. I can only hope to be so well balanced at 35
I’ll be 35 this year also, in a few weeks. Oh for some reason 35 feels hard but 36 seems fresh and new. But I think if I had anything to say to someone who is exactly my own age just about its that I am always surprised by life and that must really be the point of it all. Happy Birthday :)
Enjoy the freedom from others’ opinions & confidence in who and what you bring to the world as you turn 35! And way to get yourself a fancy present!
One December four-ish years ago I was casually chatting to my dad about my desire to not get a Christmas tree… my now-husband and I were traveling a bunch and even though I love the smell, getting a tree felt like a hassle I might regret come January 7 when it was still up and browning. But I felt guilty for not doing the expected thing. And Dad said, “You can skip the tree. That’s allowed. You have the right not to make yourself crazy.”
A comment made in passing that has become a life mantra. We all have the right not to make ourselves crazy, at Christmas and always. Amen.
Happy Birthday, Joy! Your brings me just that and I wish you a year brimming over with it.
I’m currently trying to live by the adage that, “if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.” I’ve followed you for long enough to know that you’re already a boss lady and pretty darn good at taking charge of your life, but it’s always a nice reminder. Happy birthday <3
Happy birthday joy! The best advice I can offer is to be brave. Life throws a lot at you, but you can’t worry about the “what-ifs”. Don’t hesitate and just go for it, even if something seems like too much for you to handle. Hope you have a great birthday!
My only advice is to keep doing you because you’re doing a helluva good job at it. Happy birthday, Joy!
The only advice I can give is to be so grateful for the wonderful things you have and all the luck you have had to get where you are in life! And to never feel that you have to want the same things other people want, if that’s not what you’re into! You do you, in other words :)
Happy Birthday Joy! You continue to let your life be a masterpiece of your own design. I appreciate that in you!
I hope you have the happiest of birthdays! This is my 35th year as well, and the one in which I have decided to abandon all rules — how I am expected to look, feel or interact with the world. I’ve spent the past few months just being me, and it has been wonderful!
Happy Birthday! My advice is enjoy champagne whenever possible, look forward not back and enjoy the curveballs life sends your way! Also try and understand how much better we all are for being able to read your musings and make your delicious recipes!
Just as you don’t plan your life year on year, continue by dreaming big and failing bigger. Sometimes the beauty is in the attempt!
hb jtb! inspired by the minimalism movie and of course, thoreau, my wisdom is to live deliberately!
happy birthday, joy! i’m just one year behind ya. my advice: live in earnest, always. things are better with that approach.
Happy Birthday Joy! Im already a loyal ‘follower’ of your feed on Instagram and love the creations I see made by Luna Skye. I am heading towards a significant birthday myself this year — 60! Life has flown by in a flash and I try to enjoy every stage, relish the good moments and learn from the sad ones. My advice is to try to live the ‘Golden Rule’. Treat people the way you’d like to be treated — with that, everything else seems to fall in to place.
Don’t look at the calendar. Just keep celebrating every day. :) Best wishes xx
I’m two years away from 35, so I have no sage old wisdom to give you, but when I reach 35…I want to be like you. Have a wonderful birthday! (though it seems like you already are, so that’s a plus!)
I turned 35 a few days ago too :) Not sure that I have any real pearls of wisdom except a phrase I heard recently “Wherever you are, be all there”.
Happy birthday Joy!!
Birthday wisdom: (1) If a bar carries Campri, it’s safe to get a cocktail. If the bar doesn’t know what that is, stick to beer. (2) If you have to go for a run, you may as well make it fun. Jump in some puddles, pretend there are zombies behind you, etc. Suffering is optional. (3) If your friends won’t join your impromptu dance party, you need new friends.
Dear Joy,
I don’t know you personally, and I’m sure you hear this more often than not–but seriously, I feel like we could be friends! hahah! I’ve been following your blog and instagram for awhile now…and I seriously NEVER leave comments on blogs…but like I said, I feel like we could be friends.
All that to say, wanted to wish you a very happy bday~ (35 is a good year)~ May this year ahead be filled with much joy, belly laughter, bigger dreams, fresh hope, deeper confidence, renewed purpose, delicious cakes and donuts, and of course lots of LOVE! Matt. 6:33-34 always. Bless ya!
This post comes at just the right time and I cannot agree more with what you’ve said here. Also entering my 35th year, I’m treating myself to a European vacation in the fall!
What I’ve learned(learning) with each day: apologize less, worry less about expectations from others because we’re all very different and you’re bound to let someone down, take care of yourself starting from the inside first because if you don’t treat yourself the best you can, you won’t know what that looks like when you’re asking someone else to do the same. Find as much humor and opportunities to learn as you can, and finally I’ll agree with the point about bourbon!
Happy Birthday! I am making your lemon pound cake in your honor :) It feels strange sharing wisdom when I feel I have so much yet to gain. But, I’d say keep following your path and doing things your way. My life is drastically different than yours but I’ve gotten here on my terms–and that’s how everybody deserves to get to their happy. I love what you do and look forward to reading your posts. I hope this next year is your best yet!!
Happy Birthday! I’m not quite to 35 (only three years behind though) but some wisdom I’ve learned is to stop comparing myself to others. Everyone’s path is different and if you’re lucky enough to be free and happy and do what you love, then I’d say life is good! Also continuing to be thankful because things can change in an instance, don’t take anything for granted.
Happy birthday and keep up the great work! Your blog is awesome.
I may not have much wisdom to share, but I find the simple things matter– explore worlds outside your comfort zone, share good food with good company, and laugh often.
35 is such a great age. I’m turning 39 this year. But at 35 I really started to fully understand that I had to do things that made me happy. That made saying no to things that didn’t bring me joy easier. As soon as I decided that, and started working towards it, so many things fell into place. I found my soul mate and now we have 2 little people running around bringing us joy!
Hi Joy! Today is my 31st wedding anniversary. I’m 55, 20 years older than you. What have I learned! Life goes by soooooooooo fast. Appreciate your parents. Don’t take your health for granted. Value friendships. Be happy. Rest. Always take time to smell the roses, or irises, or peonies, or whatever. Savor life….always. Happy birthday!
I think one of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt is that things will happen when they are supposed to happen. Rather than being a passive pass on working hard to achieve your goals, for me it’s about knowing that your work, hopes and dreams will to fruition when they are ready to be realised; that pushing them too hard can break them, and you; and that when it all does come together you’ll know it happened just as it should have done all along.
Happy Birthday Joy xo
Amazing! You are such an inspiration! I have been toying with the idea of starting my own business for… awhile now. It came up with a friend again today. I responded with fear-based statements, sadly. Your blog was just what I needed today. I CAN! xo
HBD Joy! Advice for you: pasta and a blanket fort can solve most problems. For everything else, champagne.
Look for the blessings in life instead of the curses, and you’ll find yourself living a much more blessed life!
Focus outside of yourself, you will learn more, do more, see more and be more.
Happy Birthday Joy…i am 100% enjoying reading all of the comments…very inspirational & energizing and though I wrote earlier I can’t seem to find my comment so…my thought was that you seem far more advanced than I was at 35…now approaching 45 I find that time is elapsing…so seize the day, laugh often & love well…cheers!
I’m approaching 38 and my biggest lessons lately have been about fear and fighting for myself – which is seems you might be able to teach me a thing or two about. In the past couple of years, I’ve greatly benefited from having a dedicated moment of devotion, prayer, and journaling before checking instagram and email (I try anyway) but not before coffee :). It’s not always pretty, but it’s brought a lot of peace and wisdom. And I rest and treat my body like it’s my friend. Live your story no matter how different it might seem from everybody else’s. Don’t be afraid to still put stickers on your notebooks and wear fly hightops. Thank you so much for being a place of encouragement!
You’ve already received such great advice. I’m just about 1.5 years older than you- I’ll be 37 in November. It sounds like you’ve learned some of the most important lessons: being true to yourself, being comfortable in your skin, do what you love (if you are lucky enough to do so!), and accept where you are. These will make for a long, happy life! I so agree with the first comment I read- each year gets better!
“laugh until your stomach hurts.”
Happy birthday : )
Cheers to a great year!
Anna
Happy birthday Joy! I’m looking forward to a whole new year of posts :).
I think the most important thing I’ve learned in the past (almost) 30 years is that you should really listen to ‘yourself’. Listen to that little voice inside, listen to your body and make sure you act on whatever they’re saying.
Happy JOYful birthday!! My advice is to keep on keepin’ on. Life is too short. Live it, love it and most importantly, laugh hard!!! <3
Spending Friday night in your PJs on the couch is far more rewarding than your 25 year old self thought it would be
Any person, thing, situation, relationship, whatever…if it isn’t adding something positive to your life, bless and release that $#&!. Ain’t nobody got time for that! Also, pizza is always a good idea. #ALWAYS. :) Happy birthday! Hope it’s magical!
I haven’t made it to 35 yet, but I will feel blessed if I do! My advice would be to not let age dictate your life and choices. I hope no one ever feels “too old” to wear and do what they love, continue doing new and unexpected things and never let a number limit your choices.
Spend time with the people that matter most to you. Get rid of the negativity when it comes around. Do what makes you happy!
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony ~ Mahatma Ghandi.
Happy Happy birthday!!!
Happy Birthday! I hope you are having a wonderful day of celebrations:)
My bit of advice comes from my dad. He always says your daily worries are just “a fart in the wind.” Haha. So enjoy the happiness found in each day instead of being bogged down by stress and worry.
XO – Sarah
https://beautyandblooms.com/
Joy, Happy Birthday!!! Celebrate each day for what they bring, even the not-so-good days. because we LEARN, no matter what. In no time you’ll be celebrating your 50th, like me, and you will wonder where the time went. No regrets!
It was pleasure to meet you at Parnassus Books in Nashville last year. I thought I would be making pies but I just recently made your white cake with Honey Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting. Divine!!!
Oh, I am not sure how much wisdom I can impart as I’m still learning to find balance in life. My favorite quote when running is “Forward is a pace”! It reminds me that no matter how slowly I move, I’m still headed towards my goals. It also helps me remember not to compare myself to others. My value isn’t tied to what somebody else achieves or how I measure up to others. Happy birthday and cheers!
Happy happy birthday! I’m also 35 (just at the halfway mark to 36), so I feel woefully unqualified to share wisdom. Something I’ve been reminding myself frequently, though: stay interested. Interesting people start by being interested.
What a wonderful gift for yourself! There’s nothing better than some jewelry. Happy birthday!
It’s the cheesy one that appears on all those silly signs at Cracker Barrel, but I always think of it “Sing like no one’s listening, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like nobody’s watching, and live like its heaven on earth.” Happy Birthday!
Live your life for you and no one else. xo
ps. I turn 35 in a couple of weeks. Since I started following your blog, your birthday posts make me less leery of my own birthday. <3
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony ~Mahatma Ghandi
Happy Happy Birthday! I’m going to go re-read your 30-yr old post now and glean some more wisdom from you!
Happy Bday Joy!
Eat when you are hungry, sleep when you are tired, and surround yourself with people that make you a better person. Sincerely,
Kelsie
When I was 35, I was leaving New York for Australia – no apartment, no car, no job – no keys. A key-less existence is a fine thing but one that I no longer have. You don’t sound like you need any advice from anyone but one piece of advice I have never forgotten is you regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did. Wishing you a very happy birthday, Joy – love, Ann
Travel this year! There is nothing that is better for the soul. Happy Birthday! xo
Live in the now. Be present. Forgive freely, love deeply, count your blessings daily. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.
I turned 35 this year too! All of the plans I made in advance never turned out, and the surprises have been MUCH better than expected. You don’t need advice from a peer, but, just to follow the rules I’ll pass this on from my mom: Put your own oxygen mask on first. That’s the only way to be in a position to truly help anyone else; to take care of yourself. Also since I’m a first-time commenter, I must say I love Drake on Cake. xo
I’m turning 30 soon and I think the thing that I’m finding most important lately is to celebrate the small things and enjoy the everyday pleasures of life. Most days life is hard and stressful and none of us can take a vacation or a day off as often as we’d like, so you have to do things like drink really good coffee and have fresh flowers in your house and sleep late when you can and drink champagne because you finally remembered to change the air filter and just enjoy the everyday moments in your life. Most of life is everyday moments and they should be cherished. But I feel like this is something you might already know ;)
Happy Birthday, Joy! Keep doing you because the world loves ya!
Happy Birthday. My life advice is to always have cookie dough in the freezer because you just never know when you need to bring someone a fresh baked cookie or eat one for breakfast.
It’s paradoxical, but a certain amount of solitude is needed in order to grow connection. And possibly the reverse is also true!
Dear Joy,
Since I’m only 24, and since you are the one I look up to and not the opposite (obviously, since you don’t even know me), it feel odd trying to give you some advice.. But I would say; walk slowlier, sing more in hallways and make yourself believe that people in general (and you in particular) look better in rain. And life will always be a bit better. Happy birthday! You are amazing!
/ Mikaela from Sweden
As someone with a less life experience than you, I’ll stick with “always be kinder than you feel” and I had a major lack of mentors and female role models so I’m embracing “be who you needed when you were younger”.
Also, “brunch without alcohol is just sad breakfast”. Looking forward to your new brunch cookbook!
A wise woman I met in a restaurant told me “Never turn away free dessert or pass on the opportunity to use a clean bathroom.” It’s the best advice I’ve ever gotten.
I’m 27 and I am not sure what advice I would give myself when I’m 35! But I remember when my husband turned 30 and he felt like it was a monumental, almost depressing, milestone. I asked him if he was happy with where he was at in his life, and that should be enough. Happiness means different things for different people. Maybe it’s owning a home, or having a job you enjoy, or having kids. I would also say (and this applies to people of all ages) that you are the only person responsible for your happiness. Sure, other people may contribute to that happiness in a big way like friends and family, but being solely dependent on others for happiness can implode if that person is no longer in your life.
“If my muscles hurt, it just means I’ve used them. If it hurts to walk up the stairs, it’s just cause I’ve done it a hundred times to lay down next to a man who loved me. My face may have wrinkles, but I have laid under hundreds of skies on sunny days. I look like this, well, because I drank and I smoked and I lived and I loved and I screwed my way through a pretty damn good life. Getting old isn’t bad. It’s earned.” –The Guardian
Happy birthday :)
Happy Birthday, Joy! My 30s have been the best years of my life and I hope they are yours, too! Just keep letting go of all the dumb things we all worry about in our 20s. Listen to your own voice, not the voices of others, when it comes to making decisions about yourself and your life. And enjoy it! The best is yet to come!
Wisdom, hmm, live every day full, but take time to notice bees butterflies, sunsets and snowflakes. Be true to yourself and it will take you far. I’m so relieved I’m not the only blogger who doesn’t plan. That just not who I am and it’s how I produce my best work. Freedom is a valuable gift we all should treasure. Happy 35th Birthday, I’m so glad you treated yourself. Sammie x
Have more fun than you think might be reasonable.
Joy, you are my elder by 2.5 years – so not a lot – but I also don’t know that I have much wisdom to share. I feel like you often offer a lot more wisdom to me than I ever could to you! Just the other day my mind wandered back to one of your older posts – I think when you turned 32, actually – and you shared some pieces of wisdom that you have learned in your life. It was so inspiring to me – so joyfully written, so true, so funny, and so, so loving! It has stayed with me!
But since you *did* ask, here is some wisdom (such as it is) that I’ve gained in the last couple years. Someone said this to me when I became a mother, but I feel like it applies to everyone, all the time. And it is this: The days go slow, but the years go fast. When you look at life like that the sometimes frustrating, sometimes annoying, mundane days look a lot more special. It really has helped me keep some perspective, take things in a little more intentionally, slow down a little bit, and just generally feel more appreciative. I feel like you already live like this – but you know, a little reminder is good, right? :)
Sorry for the tome of a comment! Happy 35, Joy! <3
We are the same age* and so the wisdom I have to impart is, of course, taken from an indie rock song circa 2006:
“And the question is: Was I more alive then than I am now? I happily have to disagree. I laugh more often now. I cry more often now. I am more ME.”
A good reminder that with each year, you are more alive and more importantly, more YOURSELF.
All the best!
*Also everything you said about having a time table for life REALLY resonated with me and I am a bit of a romance skeptic and I just a bought a house and I love to bake, so I feel a real kinship with you lately.
Happy, happy birthday Joy! Find solace in the fact that there’s so much we all can learn at every stage in life!
Happy Birthday! Glad you spoiled yourself with a gift :) something i’ve been trying to remind myself of this year is that you never regret being kind. i can think back on so many instances in my life where i had a choice and i passed up an opportunity to show kindness and i often look back with regret. I’m hoping that next time I get the chance, I will always choose kindness even if it means going out of my way. hope this year is wonderful and filled with adventure!
It’s so great that you bought yourself your first diamond. My advice – continue to really think about what makes others happy and yourself happy – then do it! There are way too many selfish peeps in this world – you aren’t one of them:) Happy Birthday!
From my side, the only thing I’ve learned so far (that may sound cheese but solid truth to me): Never stop seeing the world through your inner kid eyes. So I always try to use them! Butterflies, birds, colors, shiny things, sweet things, new people always wonder me! :)
I’m younger than you (just turned 31 last week!) but I’d say keep doing what you’re doing- it seems to be working for you!
Happy Birthday!!! Always do what makes you happy!! Don’t worry about what others think. :)
My advice is to not to listen to everyone else’s advice. Search you own soul. Take a bath. Follow your arrow. It’s taken you to some incredible places, so far.
Thank you for doing us a beauty on your special day.
Hi, Joy! I LOVE that you bought yourself earrings. You’ll treasure those puppies. I remember when I first got an adult tax return (ha, those days are so long gone) I bought myself a pair of pearl earrings and it felt immensely adult and very special … and I’m wearing them right now. Hmm, advice. I’d say lately I try to really say yes to things that feed me in some way and am trying to be aware of people and relationships that drain me, and trying to move away from them. Easier said than done, obviously. But as cliche as it sounds, life is short and days are short and time is sweet and of course we can’t spend all the moments in ways that bring us joy / make us happy, but I’m trying to at least spend them in ways that don’t bring me down. That’s it from here! xo
I’m about to hit 31, so I’m a few years behind you, but I agree with pretty much everything you said. I’d also add that when you don’t get what you want out of life, remember that not getting what you want can sometimes be the best thing ever, because we really are often so terrible at picking what we need (thinking of prayers concerning the love of ex boyfriends right now. YIKES).
Happy birthday!
Thank you for this inspiring post. The decade of the 30’s is a beautiful ten years. I wish you all the best in your 35th year. Here’s to a year of health, happiness, and harmony!
Happy Birthday Joy! I’ve been 35 for 4 months now and my advice is this: don’t be in too much of a hurry, listen to your heart, follow your passions and take time to simply be.
Happy birthday! Enjoy your beautiful earrings. For my 35th, I got myself a beautiful piece of art.
Happy Birthday! I love your posts, always so positive & fun!
Wisdom for your 35th year on this planet: Don’t let anyone steal your joy. Enjoy life!
xo
Happiest of birthdays, sweet Joy!! As someone staring 40 in it’s face, the one thing i truly learned in my 30’s is ‘do what you love, and eff the rest. oh, and buy that handbag!’ ;)
This is so fun! I’m enjoying everyone’s words of wisdom and am inspired by all your accomplishments so far. You’re amazing. Get it, girl! My advice comes from my mother. Aim to have friends much younger than you and also friends that are much older than you. Both have a lot to offer in terms of perspective and life experience, and you have a lot to give as a mentor and student! Here’s to your 35th year. I hope you celebrated with a few extra cupcakes.
Happy birthday Joy! As a 22 year old soon-to-be college grad going through what feels like a quarter-life-crisis, I don’t feel like I’m in any position to give you any sort of wisdom, but here is a little quote gives me direction and clarity when the chaos and constant change and messiness of real life feel overwhelming:
“Which do you want: the pain of staying where you are, or the pain of growth?”
My other piece of advice is to read Dear Sugar, if you haven’t already. Your writing reminds me of the lovely Cheryl Strayed :)
Learning this year that life can change at any moment which is terrifying and exciting at this same time! Happy birthday!
Happy birthday, Joy! I’m not sure I have any advice other than keep doing what you love and following your passion and everyday is a true gift.
No matter how mad another driver makes you, don’t flip them off. It could be dangerous.
Not sure if my other comment worked. I would go with Amy Poheler’s words of wisdom…”Good for her, not for me”. Its done wonders for me to realize that what is good and right for one is not good and right for another. Happy Birthday!
Find the funny. Life throws you curve balls you never expect. You have to learn to laugh in the midst of the crazy. Happy Birthday Joy–you’re so talented. Thank you for putting it out there for us to see. xo
Always, always, always, drink the beer, eat the taco, and inhale the damn cupcake.
Happy Birthday, Joy!!! My wisdom is to not let people take your goodness from you. Be with people (friends or otherwise) who are also genuinely good people and only want the best for you. You should be able to share your goodness and kind heart with someone who will share the same with you–don’t let anyone take it from you.
Happy Birthday, Joy! I’ve loved watching your blog grow over the years. Thanks for always keeping my heart (and stomach) full of goodness. My bit of wisdom is as follows: Don’t wait for someone else to love you. Love yourself, unapologetically and even on your darkest days. Nurture that love, let it grow and spill over into the lives of everyone around you. Confession: I am still working on this.
Happy birthday! 35 sounds wonderful. I don’t really have any great wisdom, still trying to figure myself out, but one saying I like to keep around is “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” Drama-free is the way to be. :)
Never go to bed Hangry! ;)
A very happy birthday to you Joy and thank you for all you do!
Keep feeling fascination!
Happy birthday! Don’t delay your dreams and keep bringing joy to others and joy will come to you!
HBD, lady. You made it and I salute you! The only advice I can offer is to be unapologetically you, always; I regret every time I don’t follow this. YOU’RE YOU. That’s my motto! My husband would say I use it too frequently, but to that I say “I’m me!”. Much light to you in your 36th year.
I wish you a very happy birthday, and wish for you to always listen to your inner compass. I admire your creativity and confidence, and always find it inspiring.
Don’t feel bad about saying NO. Thanks for a generous giveaway and HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Enjoy!
Keep your heart wide open, always. Do loving things for yourself like taking a bubble bath and reading, always. Stay in the present and follow your dreams, always. Forgive others and tell your friends and family how special they are to you, always. Be kind and love your own mind + body, always. Celebrate, feel, cry, laugh, swim, jump, stretch, and most importantly LOVE, always. Happy Birthday!!
xxo,
Lacey
Happy Happy Birthday Joy! I’m nearly there too :D My 2cents so far? To thine ownself be true, always make sure you have at least one bro (just like the wolf alice song!), and don’t be afraid to do something that scares you, at least once in a while :) Hugs and CONGRATS!
My favorite mantra from my favorite lady Amy Poehler: “good for her, not for me.” Meaning, ‘that’s great that Shannon has four kids and a CEO husband and a house in the Bahamas! I’m happy for her! Me, I’m doing my own thing. It’s totally great in it’s own way.’
Hope it’s a good one, Joy :)
Well, I just turned 30 this year so I’m not sure I have any knowledge you don’t – but, someone once told me “wherever you go, you take yourself with you”.
My birthday is tomorrow so we share the same birthday week! My advice to you (and myself)…is to be in love with every minute of your life (and it sounds like you are) and live in the present. I really tried to be more present and not worry too much about the future this past year and I’m much happier now!
I’m about to turn 30, so I’m not sure I have wisdom to offer that you haven’t already discovered, but my resolution for myself in this next decade is to remember that you are no good to anyone if you don’t take care of yourself first. To be a good friend/partner/daughter/sister/parent you need to be strong enough to support the.
Thinking back to the delights and freedom of 35 from the ripe old age of 65, all I can tell you is to enjoy every day and live as if you WERE just turning 18!
Listen. That’s my advice. And not just that “I’m looking like I’m listening but I’m really planning my next story” kind of listening. Really listen to people. Hear their heart. You’ll learn a lot. It will push you to grow and you’ll be able to see the world from another person’s perspective.
Happy birthday! I honestly don’t remember my 35th birthday but I think that’s because at the time I was planning a wedding for a marriage that, after 10 years, recently ended. What I’ve learned that I would pass on is that life doesn’t always turn out how we plan or hope, but in the end it does have a way of working out for the best. I am still friends with my ex-husband and am thankful for the time we had. And I’m looking forward to the next adventures as a single-again 40-something :-)
I’ve only been 35 for 10 months but I’d say you’ve got the right idea. Don’t beat yourself up for things not going the way you expected and embrace the future! :)
From our dear friend Drake: Everybody dies, but not everybody lives.
Happy Birthday Joy! My advice is to really value self-care, especially as someone who is their own boss. We’re harder on ourselves than anyone else!
Go after what you want no matter your age :)
I’m turning 28 on the 28th (yay, Golden Birthday!!) and what I’m learning right now is this: Sit with it. As in, stop avoiding all the things you’re avoiding (usually thoughts for me) and just sit with it, wrestle with it, deal with it, and you’ll be stronger and healthier and happier for it. It’s a process…
My advice…Well, I’m getting ready to turn 35 in just a few weeks, so I’m not sure what advice I could possibly give you that you probably don’t already give yourself.
All I can say is that over the years I’ve grown to enjoy the phrases – “So it goes.” Or “It is what it is.” & “No big deal.” These are my mantras. I say them out loud or in my head whenever I feel myself stressing out of my to-do list, realize I need to hit the store because all I have in my fridge is beer; eggs; bacon; and feta cheese, I drop and break a very expensive crystal vase that perhaps my mom has given me (just saying), or I’m heartbroken over someone else’s decision to ditch me and the life we’ve built together. It happens. It has happened. No doubt these things will probably continue to happen – let’s hope not a lot. But it’s no big deal. I’ll survive.
Keep keeping on and doing what makes you happy. Only you can.
Happy Birthday! I agree with so many others: It seems that the days, months, and years do fly by faster & faster the older I get, so… Enjoy yourself, do what makes you happy.
It sounds like you are pretty wise already! But, as a I near 40, I realize that there are no guarantees in life and you are in charge of your life and your destiny. And get rid of friends that cause needless drama! (unless you like that sort of thing…)
It sounds to me like you’re not having too much difficulty sorting your life out, but my advice to myself is good advice for anyone: set yourself a goal every day, and try your hardest to achieve it. Sometimes it’s a bad day and you’re just working to get out of bed and take care of yourself, some days your goal might seem so big it scares you a bit, but if you’re trying you’ll get there, or part of the way. Anything is better than nothing! (And I say this on a not-so-great day for me …)
Happy birthday, Joy! I’m only a year older than you. My advice is to keep enjoying life and friends and family the way you already do. You’re obviously doing something right. Why change it?
Tanti Auguri! Like you, I also lived in Italy with someone I loved, and it was there that I learned to stop planning out my life. From that point onward, my life has unfolded so beautifully that no amount of planning could have made me happier than I am now. Planning can be replaced with the adventure of choice in our present, as long as the heart remains open. I wish you many more years of adventure! Happy birthday, Joy!
Happy Birthday! I just turned 34 and one thing I’ve noticed as the days go on is that you may not be in touch with all your friends in the same way, but the really great people will always be there when you need them. And you get to be there for them too. I also try to live by this nugget of advice from the Lady Chablis: “two tears in a bucket, mother*uck it.”
Laugh every day and look for beauty in the unexpected.
Many happy returns!
Happy Happy Birthday Joy! That is so amazing and inspiring that you don’t have a timeline to let go of. Some of the best life advice I’ve gotten is to be consistent in thought and action. Enjoy your special day!
happy birthday!!!! Keep on killing it!!!
Always say please and thank you. And in that spirit: thank you for your blog!
Happy Birthday Joy! My husband’s birthday was yesterday and mine is tomorrow. Although we’re 10 years your junior, I thought I’d share some advice. My dad has told me for years never to judge the quality of your life by your achievements, by how many awards you’ve won or degrees you’ve achieved, by how much money you’ve made or success you’ve had, because in doing so, we often lose track of ourselves and who we are outside of what we’ve done. He’s said to always remember that the achievements are not who you are or how you define yourself. You are what you love to do on a sunny Saturday afternoon in August. You are the kindness that exudes from your smile to a stranger. You’re the person who loves and is loved in return. Never forget that you work hard to make a living, but that your life is not defined by your career.
All the best wishes for a new year of adventure and blessings for you!
Happy Birthday Joy! My advice after 58 years on this planet is….Smile, just smile through it all.
Happy birthday!! I hope you have some fun celebrations!! Something I like to remind myself is no matter how busy or stressed we get, we should always make time for the people we love (even ourselves!)
Happiest of birthdays to one of my favorite people! Although we’ve never met in person, it has been a pleasure and privilege to share and relate to your journey for the last six plus years. You continue to be an inspiration and provide great content to cheer me up on hard days. I’m also entering my 35th year of life this summer and the best advice I can return to you is to simply be kind, especially to yourself. We often get caught up in life and forget that everyone is going through something – big or small and good or bad. It’s easy to criticize, but often “if we only knew…,” we would be more understanding. Celebrate to your heart’s desire and enjoy yourself!
-Vanessa
Happy Birthday!! You are so beautiful and inspiring, I am happy you’re on this planet at the same time as me! Always remember that age has nothing to do with maturity and that can be both a good or a less good thing.
Be as kind to yourself as you are to others. Give yourself the grace to forgive yourself for mistakes you’ve made, and appreciate the lessons you’ve learned day by day and year by year.
Be yourself, never try to be someone else to impress someone else. Love yourself!
Happy Birthday Joy. You’re an inspiration! :)
Be the woman you’d like to be remembered as one day! Happiest Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday Joy! I just turned 30 this year, and am still learning how to let go of “the plan” and just let life breathe. I’m envious that you’ve already figured that out! Enjoy every moment, don’t sweat the small stuff, and post more Tron pictures! My kitties are my pride and joy, and I love seeing pictures of yours :) :)
My experience: It only gets better as we age (like a fine wine!) Embrace it and be true to yourself. Happiest of Birthdays, Joy!
Wine. Popcorn. You know where I’m going. Be fierce and amazing , and keep bringing us all the delicious recipes!
My son often refers to a motto he learned during 10 years in the Navy: Endeavor to persevere. I think it works for all of us.
Don’t worry too much abt what others are doing. And always say yes to chocolate.
A chocolate a day keeps the blues away. :) Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday Joy! I’m just a few years older than you so what wisdom could I have to impart!?!?! You are doing what you do and you are awesome at it. The only advice I could possibly give is to just keep being the bomb.
Happy birthday! Love on yourself, love on your friends and family, and every morning you wake up in New Orleans, step outside and take a deep breath and take in the magic of that place.
I’m six months behind you in this aging business, but a few years ago I tried to adopt this philosophy in my day to day and it really has made everything better: With every decision and every interaction in your life, no matter how big or small, you are either easing suffering or causing suffering. So aspire to always make the choice that eases suffering (even though sometimes the easing of suffering long term might pose some short term discomfort for yourself or others – it sounds complicated but I find it very easy to apply!). Happy Birthday!
Happy happy birthday, Joy! My advice…always choose fries over salad. And never turn down homemade cake. And 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 – “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
Happy Birthday. My advice to you is to take a lot of of pictures and videos and/or keep a journal. It’s so awesome reminder to see how far you have come.
Happy Birthday! I’m 36 and I don’t have much in the way of advice, so I’ll send you a wish. I wish for you that the amount of F*^k$ you give about things that aren’t important drops like the stock market at 35 and that the people in your life you give a lot of F*^k$ about climbs as high as Mt. Everest!
Happy birthday Joy. I agree that 35 IS a great year. I wish you a wonderful year full of fulfillment and Joy. As for wisdom, I would suggest that you daily read a chapter of the book of Proverbs. God’s word is the source of wisdom.
Happy Birthday! A beautiful post – always go after what you want! It’s cliche, but true, you only regret the things you don’t do, not the things you do. Just do it!
Joy, thank you for sharing your JOY with all of us!
When in doubt…just add more butter ;) (I’m pretty sure this is sound advice for any situation…)
Happiest of birthdays! I find this post about you ironic, as you are someone that constantly gets me to stop and think not about myself but the world at large, and how I can be a better contributor with everyday tasks/thoughts/words. So here’s to another year of connecting and growing.
I too just reached the big 3-5. My goals for this year include living in the moment and really being present for everything that comes my way. Happy birthday!
I’m about 10 years younger than you so I feel like you should be the one giving me advice but here is something I’ve been thinking about lately. When you’re very happy and your life is going great just enjoy it and don’t worry about how long it will last. This is what I do whenever my life is going well and I’m working on it. Happy birthday!
Happy, happy birthday Joy! I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your “birthday posts” over the years – I still have the 21 pieces of advice if you are turning 21 on my fridge (i’m 25 now) and many of them I still have to remind myself of all the time. Also, “you’re not the kind of girl who settles…keep not settling” is probably one of the truest things (for me) that you have ever written. ANYWAYS — my advice for you is take it one day at a time – and find the good in every day. That has worked out for me up until this point. Have a fantastic day and year!
I’m about to enter 35 (2 months) and while not older and certainly not wiser I would say this, after a long hard year learning to live in the moment (not normally my strong suit) and embrassing every fun opportunity that comes my way has made me very comfortable with my age and where I am. I haven’t followed any life plan either, and while conventionally it might be different, I am happy and healthy. The wise part hopefully comes soon…! Happy Birthday Joy!
Happy birthday, Joy! I’ve loved your blog for years and years, and I love that you live your lift to the fullest. I also love NOLA, and I was so excited to follow along when you moved there! Thanks for the giveaway! As far as advice goes, you are 3 years older than me, so I’d rather take my advice from you…you give it much better than I do! =)
Happiest birthday, Joy. I am younger, so I don’t have any wisdom to share about why lies ahead. May your new year be full of joy, peace, and wisdom.
Dear Joy: Happy birthday! I am a long time reader and BIG JTB fan. My advice? Continue being you. I love your blog’s “voice”, love your food, and love Drake on Cake. You are such an inspiration, and I am so glad you are in this world.
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
My favorite quote from Howard Thruman sums it up the best! Happy Birthday!
Your advice and confidence are gems that I hope can inspire my life. My birthday is coming up at the end of the month (31 on the 31st- it’s only going to happen once!) and I was trying to reflect and find my own wisdom.
One of the things that helps me stay positive and appreciate my world is to recall what my mother used to tell me about my great grandfather. “He used see the beauty in everything. His passion was to collect succulents and cacti, and every single plant to him was amazing. Nothing in the world was ugly to him. This was a man who loved life and truly lived happily.” His graciousness came from his attitude and appreciation towards life. This is the attitude I always remind myself of when I get caught up in my failures and flaws. Enjoy life, live and appreciate.
Let’s rock this birthday thing Joy!
Be grateful for every moment. Happy Birthday!
Age is just the number of years you’ve been on the planet, wisdom is the number of years you’ve been awake to the world around you, and old is what happens when you stop participating in your own life.
Happiest of Birthdays to a fellow Gemini!
Laugh often and eat good food.
The mantra that has helped to get me through this year is this, “You can and you will. Trust yourself.”
Wishing you a year filled with light, love, and of course, cake. xox
Happy birthday! It’s so nice to see how content you are with life, I wish more people could be that way. You’ve probably already figured this out but I feel like it’s always worth repeating: never compare your life to others’. Just make sure you’re living the life you want
Hello, Joy! You are the one blogger whose postings I *always* read, even when I don’t have time for anything else. You have brought light and laughter into my kitchen and I know it is the same for many of your readers, so that is something of which you can be very proud. As for advice from those of us who may be older, but not necessarily wiser (at 62yo), there is one thing that always stuck with me. When I was 30 and very depressed that I had “ruined” my life because I hadn’t made any of the timeline milestones I thought I should have done by then, my best friend told me to buck up, quit worrying about what I *should* have done and decide what I want to do NOW. He said: Don’t look back once you have gleaned whatever lessons you needed to learn from whatever happened. Don’t look too far forward, because you don’t know what will happen or who will enter your life. Be Here Now! It was the best advice I ever received and changed my life forever! Happy 35th Birthday!
I also have a milestone birthday coming up this year. I turn 30 in October and plan to read your lessons you’ve learned before turning 30 post again to encourage myself to step positively into this transition of becoming a woman in my 30’s!
My wisdom for you is to learn to let yourself be. Be an observer of yourself without judgement and without censure. Foster awareness of your thoughts and actions, but try not to force yourself to behave or think a certain way. Giving yourself the freedom to live your truth can be a truly powerful thing.
Wishing you all the best on your birthday, Joy. I appreciate you and your blog more than you know.
Happy Happy Birthday Joy! I’m coming up on my 27th birthday on Tuesday, and I can say I’ve come to appreciate the thought process of “do what makes you happy”. Drink the wine, do the yoga, love your cat without any fear of being a crazy cat lady as long as that’s what you want. And do them all with so much enthusiasm! Enjoy 35!
<3 Stacy
always wash your face before bed! always!
I love your outlook on life! My birthday is next month and my goal is to be more present in my everyday life – I’m going to try and start journaling.
Happy Birthday, Joy! I’m older than you by five years and what I can tell you is that it only gets better from here, and you still have so much to look forward to. I feel better about myself than I ever have, and I am wishing the same for you in the years to come! Keep enjoying life. :)
Enjoy every day, Joy! I hit 35 two years ago, and it just gets better.
All I can say is: love yourself and be kind to yourself. And happy birthday! Thank you so much for your words.
xx Hannah // http://www.HomemadeBanana.com
I remember something you said in an interview I read a while back – “keep not settling” – I think that’s such a great piece of advice for any age. It really comforted, inspired, and motivated me at the time and to this day. Thanks Joy and happy happy birthday!
Happy Birthday Joy! I’m not sure I’m so qualified to leave advice, as I am a bit younger than you and usually turn to your posts for a daily dose of wisdom and cake, but if there is anything I would say to a friend on their birthday, it would be to make sure you’re still having random 11pm dance parties on a Wednesday, going for walks when the day feels stressful and flying home to visit your parents. Make sure you take care of yourself in a world that never wants you to stop moving. Cheers!
My bit of wisdom comes from a letter Ted Hughes wrote to his son many years ago. It is one of my favorite quote, I hope you enjoy it: “The only calibration that counts is how much heart people invest, how much they ignore their fears of being hurt or caught or humiliated. And the thing people regret is that they didn’t live boldly enough, that they didn’t invest enough heart, didn’t love enough. Nothing else really counts at all.” Ted Hughes
Happy birthday, and here’s to many more years of living boldly :)
don’t wait to travel somewhere you have always wanted to go!
I hope you have a very Happy Birthday! I love your nails! Enjoy your life to the fullest!
Happy birthday!!!! One thing I’m trying to do in 26 is take more chances and be less afraid to fall :)
“Do not be yourself. Be a kinder person.” Reminds me to try to do better, but also to be kind to myself. Bonne fête!
Happy birthday, dear Joy! I admire your honesty, vulnerability, and TLC that you show others, your work, and yourself. While I’m sure you’ve heard this before, I encourage you to be full of JOY. Your namesake fits you perfectly and I believe your soul is made perfectly for giving and receiving joy. Cheers to you, lady!
My bit of wisdom comes from a letter Ted Hughes wrote to his son years ago. It’s one of my favorite, I hope you enjoy it:
“The only calibration that counts is how much heart people invest, how much they ignore their fears of being hurt or caught or humiliated. And the thing people regret is that they didn’t live boldly enough, that they didn’t invest enough heart, didn’t love enough. Nothing else really counts at all.” Ted Hughes
Happy Birthday, and here’s to many more years of living boldly :)
Happy Birthday!!
I am nine years older than you and I can say it really does get better every year and we get wiser! Always follow your gut (I mean literally with donuts and figuratively too! Haha!)
I love birthdays. I love anniversaries, and the new year, and the first day of school. I love any point in time where you can have an excuse to mark another year passing and reflect on what happened and what’s to come.
My advice comes in the form of my own affirmation/mantra: Let whatever you do today be enough. Working hard, striving, pushing forward are all great things, and necessary to lead a productive life, but some days, just breathing and putting one foot in front of the other is all you can do. On those days, remember that is enough. Just being is enough.
Happy Birthday, Joy! You’ve been an internet mentor for many years, and I hope your voice is always there!
Best!
The question marks are not supposed to be there! Sorry. Also laugh and love as much as possible
Save your money, so you can spend it where it really counts.
Count your blessings. Be kind. Hug more, laugh loud, love more.
I’m turning 34 this year and I was definitely the type who lived by a timeline and in a lot of ways stuck to that timeline. A few years ago, I lost my first born at 39 weeks and then a few months later I lost my grandmother (who was like a second mother to me). Between that I was pregnant with my son, who is now 10 months.
We can have all the timelines and plans in the world, but life will do what life does. Give and take. I learned that in the darkest of days, there is still light and that life continues on. We change, we get damaged, we get stronger, and we learn to love each day/person/moment that much more.
Happy 35 and here’s to many more years of good living!
Take time to appreciate the little things in life!
Happy Birthday Joy! Breathe deeply, and let the grass tickle your toes — if you skip through the grass barefoot, you can’t help but smile! Have a wonderful year!
I hunted for a while for something to say… but your post sums it up pretty perfectly: Live your life the way you want, and keep moving forward! That’s all we can really do – and why shouldn’t we? Laissez les bons temps rouler!
Be yourself! There are plenty of somebody elses.
And you are a terrific one. And treat yourself (at least) once a week. Can’t wait to see what deliciously decadent recipes your next 35 will bring, I hope you enjoy your day tremendously.
Warm hugs and wishes,
Sara.
https://theredhenapron.wordpress.com/
Happy Birthday dear Joy! I will turn 55 in August. Keep growing and learning. Be kind. Listen to your intuition, even if it seems silly. Don’t do anything you don’t want to do. Don’t spend time with people unless they are important to you. Live and speak your truth. Also, the men- women stuff never changes even though we keep getting older. Except perhaps if we have been paying attention, we understand each other a little bit better. ????????????
My advice? Laugh. At yourself, at life. It’s not always easy, buy I’ve found that a lighter approach helps eliminate stress and anxiety and makes living more fun, which is exactly what we’re here to do, enjoy ourselves, right? :)
I am about to enter my 35th year in a little less than a month and every day I have to remind myself – you’re never going to please everybody!!
Thank you for all your delicious recipes that stand the test of time and somehow…please everybody I share them with!
I’m 21 and I think you’re pretty far ahead of me in the wisdom department, but my mom has always told me that her 40s were the best decade of her life, and I think of that when I freak out about what adulthood will bring. Happy birthday! I have followed your blog and other creative projects for years and the wisdom and positivity you send into the world has truly impacted me and the way I think about what I want my life to look like.
Loved reading this as my own birthday was just a few days ago. I have been trying to come up with a mantra for my coming year and I think the best advice I can give is just go with the flow! A lot can happen in a year.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I don’t think I’m qualified to offer wisdom, but one of my favorites is this: “Be joyful always!” which seems like something you have a good handle on already :).
Happy Birthday Joy! A little quote that my stepdad gave me ~ You can never make anyone happy unless you make yourself happy first. Took me a long time to realize the truth in this.
Self care and treat yo’self to the max because you (and me! we! all of us!) deserve it.
Set your sights on learning from everything, good and bad. And happy, Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! I have been working to be happy and live the best I can with what I have instead of waiting until I have the dream thing. “This kitchen doesn’t have enough storage. When we buy a house it will. I guess there’s no point in trying to keep this one tidy…” That’s no way to live!
happiest of birthdays joy! i LOVE that you treated yourself to some beautiful diamonds… you deserve it. my advice comes through elizabeth gilbert who rocked my world with this talk: https://www.supersoul.tv/supersoul-sessions/elizabeth-gilbert-flight-hummingbird-curiosity. my advice is a mantra that it seems you also live by: STAY CURIOUS. “Curiosity only does one thing, and that is to give. And what it gives you are clues on the incredible scavenger hunt of your life.” xoxo
p.s. my IG is bverma – i’ve been following you for some time, and just followed Luna Skye!
the good news is that it just keeps getting better, and we keep getting wiser and figuring everything out as we go!! thanks for so much inspiration over the years and hey also: drake on cake, thanks for that! such good stuff! happy birthday!!! :)
Keep enjoying your 30’s! I am 42 and found my 30’s to be the decade I tuned in with my true self and embraced what I found, all the good, and the not so good. It was the first time I felt truly comfortable in my skin and ok with being me. 30’s are great, and so far 40’s aren’t too shabby either. Happy birthday Joy!!!!!
Be kind to yourself. I just turned 30, and that’s my goal for this year. It’s surprisingly hard to give yourself a break, and applaud yourself for just doing your best.
I just turned 30 a few weeks ago and I was so worried about it. I thought it was a big deal and my older coworkers were trying to gently explain why it’s not and I was happy to have their advice. I didn’t know about your blog 5 years ago but I went back and read that link about things you learned at 30 and it was really comforting. If I’ve learned anything myself it seems to be that I don’t think I’ll ever have a birthday where I finally feel ‘grown up’ in the way I thought of my parents being when I was young. It sure seemed like they had everything together, when really they were just figuring it all out as they went and that’s what were doing now and that’s ok. It’s easy to get wrapped up in your own head and not realize that a so many millions of people have grown up just like this ahead of us and they were alright and we’ll be alright too.
Joy,
Even though I’m 30 years older (don’t tell anyone), I am so impressed that at 35 you have a lot figured out! I love the wisdom you share with us, not to mention the delicious recipes. I still love “the best chocolate frosting” recipe and use it every time I bake.
Happy Birthday! Continue to follow your dreams and live the life you’ve created. Good things to you, always.
Karen
borrowing from mindy kaling’s mom here, but–be your own best friend
happiest of birthdays!
(not sure if my comment already posted–sorry for the re-post if that happened!)
Happy Birthday, Joy!!
Whenever advice is offered, it’s best to listen and take it in. Then, follow your heart. If you’re going to make mistakes in life, it’s easier to live with your own… rather than regret someone else’s.
Happy 35th birthday to you !!!! My advice to you would be make meditation a regular practice in your life so that when things go crazy, which they will from time to time, you will stand strong.
I think you already have all the wisdom needed to get through 35 gracefully and happily. My advice it to keep being you ! :)
Happy Birthday, Joy!
“Have patience with everything that remains unresolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”
-Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to A Young Poet
I fully believe in doing small acts with great kindness. Little bits of loveliness spread around make life a little sweeter for everyone.
My advice: You do you! Don’t let others dictate your actions.
every time you fail to speak up, a little part in you dies
Happy birthday!! My piece of wisdom to give to you is to stay as curious as you were as a child and to keep exploring new things. Enjoy your day :)
Happy birthday! I don’t think I’ve ever commented before, but I thought I would share a piece of wisdom that I read in the book Shantaram (by Gregory David Roberts) about two years ago. For me it perfectly embodies the sense of nostalgia and wistfulness that I associate with various places in my life (all 25 long years of it). I struggle with leaving meaningful places behind, and I was somewhat ashamed about this – why couldn’t I just let go? This quote makes me feel like that wistfulness is okay, and perhaps even a little bit beautiful.
“It’s said that you can never go home again, and it’s true enough, of course. But the opposite is also true. You must go back, and you always go back, and you can never stop going back, no matter how hard you try.”
I’d also thought I’d share some wisdom that you’ve imparted on me since I started reading your blog when I was 18. My life was dictated by my “timeline plan”, and when it didn’t go accordingly, I had a reeeal hard time. You have unknowingly helped me cope, with butter and sugar and whisking and the various life moves that you have been generous enough to share with us.
It’s okay to be in a place that you don’t know. And always use butter.
Invest in some quality sheets and towels. You use them every day and it’s like a daily treat for yourself. And more rooftop cocktails always :)
don’t play yourself
The Happiest of Birthday’s to you!! I think you have an amazing outlook on life, taking things as they come, and not worrying about how or when they do, my advice would be to never waver from these beliefs. Your journey is a source of inspiration to many, and I can only imagine all the wonderful things this year and all the years after will bring you. <3 <3
Happy Birthday Joy! I am also turning 35 this year. As a long time follower of your blog, my only advice to you would be to keep on keeping on. You exude thoughtfulness and sincerity through your writing and keep so many people inspired, what an accomplishment. Thanks for sharing part of your world with your readers!
Wu Wei
Happy birthday! I don’t have much wisdom of my own to share, but I do think a little wisdom to settle the soul comes from getting outside for at least a few minutes every day, even on the busiest or most humid days of the year!
As someone who is not yet 35, thank you for doing you! Thank you for reaching for YOUR dreams!
Some advice would be to keep doing you! Live in confidence and without fear. Trust that God will help you along the way, and that its okay to not have it all figured out! Also learn to love yourself more each day! ( I’m sill working on that)
Happy birthday!
A few words of wisdom from some old friends:
Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. – Rumi
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
The only reason for time is so that everything doesn’t happen at once. – Albert Einstein
And an untitled note in my phone:
A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch but on her own wings.
Cheers to your years.
“Do not be yourself. Be a kinder person.”
A nice reminder to always try to do a bit better. Includes, of course, being kind to one’s self. <3
Cheers, Joy! Enjoy your birthday in style. I can spot you twenty years and offer a few ideas born of experience. A sort of mantra spoken daily by a character my favorite mystery series has always resonated with me: God bless the work. Doesn’t matter whether it’s difficult or mind-numbingly boring, engage in what you do with enthusiasm and be grateful that you are able to do it. Then hopefully you can eat chocolate and move on to something you really WANT to do.
Lately this quote has been really meaningful to me, so I’ll leave it here in the hopes that it resonates with you or someone else!
“So, what if, instead of thinking about solving you whole life, you just think about adding additional good things. One at a time. Just let your pile of good things grow.”
? Rainbow Rowell, Attachments
I am not too far behind 35 so my advice to you is Live everyday as if it were your last, Laugh at every chance you get, and Love like you mean it! Also travel as much as you can and enjoy the great outdoors :) Happy Birthday and I wish you many many more! ~achiquita (Instagram)
“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” — Maya Angelou
I wish you the happiest of birthdays!!! I’m a bit older than you are (51) and what I’ve learned is that quality of life is more important than just about anything – certainly better than quantity of stuff – spend time and money on experiences, rather then accumulating things. You’ll be healthier, happier and a better person for it!
Happy happy happy birthday to you. My advice is to cut your hair. Just do it. It grows back.
Joy it’s been wonderful following your blog for years and watch the amazing things you’re doing on your life journey! It’s so nice to read that you live in today, not yesterday or tomorrow. (That would be my advice but you’ve got this) You are wise beyond your years and have put many a smile on our faces! Keep going Joy!
Happy birthday! A quote from Oprah has really stuck with me – “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.”
I had a hard time with turning 30, until a mentor in my life had to remind me that I have life experiences (good and bad) that no one else has and I should focus on that instead of missing my youth. It did the trick!
I don’t think you need advice because it seems like you are doing it right! I am a few years older than you and i have also subscribed to doing things my own way and in my own time and it has been a good life. So my only advice would be to keep doing what you are doing…and treat yo’ self as often as possible!
Happy birthday, Joy!! In preparation for wisdom tooth surgery next week, I told myself “this will only be as bad as you let it be.” I like to think it goes both ways and is true for awesome things too!
Happiest of Birthday’s Joy!! My girlfriend’s 25th birthday was 2 weeks ago and the quote that I sent her would apply to your 35th birthday…”Being twenty-five, thirty-five, forty-five or fifty-five doesn’t matter as long as you welcome every new opportunity of your life with a high five!” Enjoy your day!!
Happy birthday, Joy!!! Your name perfectly describes your blog; thank you for sharing your food and your life with us. I’ve just started my own food blog, and yours is one that I look to for inspiration, for photography, but mostly to remind myself to stay…myself. So, thanks :)
As for advice, I like the phrase “Goals are dreams with their work pants on.” You’ve got dreams, you’ve got work pants, and now you have (fantastic taste in) diamond earrings. You can’t go wrong!
Next year it’s my turn – 35! I have been following your blog and podcast for a long long time and it might sound cheesy, but I kind of see you as a role model. So have a wonderful year and let me take some notes. All the best you wonderful human being, X
I turned 35 on Sunday myself! Happy Birthday to us! ;) The best advice I have comes from my Great-grandma Pearl. She always said, “enjoy the age you’re at because you’ll never get it back.” Truer words have never been spoken. I hope this is a wonderful year for you.
Everything is worse at night. Just go to bed and things will look brighter in the morning! Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday! My thought for you – be willing to learn from your mistakes, but remember they do not define you. There is fresh grace every day. :-)
Happy birthday from one Nola transplant to another!
I love this post Joy! I find it inspiring as I approach 30 myself. Recently I’ve been reading a lot about how we get to choose our struggle and that it’s ok to choose our struggle when we’re struggling towards something we want and it seems worth it!
I’m only 29, but I can at least give you the wisdom my 97 year old Gran gave me last year right before she died:
“You can only compare yourself to yourself. So, baby girl, you do you and then try to do it better next time.”
She was amazing and thinking about all the good things she told me makes me tear up SO hard! Happy 35th year! I’ve been following this blog since you started, and I’d say you look just as fabulous as ever!
I follow you (obvi) and now Luna Skye on Instagram. My insta is here: https://www.instagram.com/warmvanillasugar/
Happy Birthday! We are peers in age and in baked goods, so I’m sharing advice I tell myself on the daily “Lead with love.” In everything.
Wow, way to go on that gift to yourself! Those earrings are stunning, and the necklace is amazing! Who doesn’t love moonstone and diamonds? Luna Skye Jewelry is so very lovely, as is your 35th year, I hope!
My best advice is “let gratitude be your attitude.” I try to tap into feelings of gratitude, joy, and love on a daily basis. I’m not very religious, but sometimes I say this little prayer just to reiterate my gratitude to the Universe: “Thank you lord, for what you’ve done for me. Thank you lord, for what you’re doing now. Thank you lord, for every little thing. Thank you lord, for you have made me sing.” You know who wrote it? Bob Marley. Happy birthday, Joy!
Happiest of birthdays – get plenty of sleep, laughter and sunshine. Your life will be great.
“So plant your own gardens and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers”
You’ve done things on your own time, on your own terms, and for that you should be hella proud (also, you’re absolutely hilarious, so BONUS!)
H A P P Y 3 5 t h B I R T H D A Y, J O Y!
“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” C. S. Lewis
Happy birthday! I may be 9 years younger than you, but the one thing I have always considered important is self care! So my advice to you for the year is to take some time every day for yourself. That may be meditating, or playing with your cat, or reading a good book, just do something for you that doesn’t stress you out. You’re doing something you love, but even that can be stressful sometimes!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! It sounds to me like you have been rocking on so continue being true to you.
Happy Birthday Joy! Today’s birthday advice: march to the beat of your own drum (which you are already doing so well!) and always say yes to cake. Enjoy your day – you deserve it!
Happy birthday, Joy! My best piece of wisdom for year 35 is to work hard and be nice to people. You’re already going it. Keep it up!
Birthday twin!! I’ve always been a fan of May the 25th. It’s a good date. And at 30 this year, it’s a big year. But my advice is much more granular: just be present. Life isn’t about a big milestone or specific date. It’s the little moments that make up a thousand than then make up life. So acknowledge and love every single one – even the bad ones, as the good ones will be that much sweeter.
Happy birthday! I’ve been reading your blog since the very beginning and it’s been lovely to follow your growth and adventures. We’re in roughly the same age range and I’ve so admired your adventuresome spirit. It may sound funny, but I’m so proud of you for following your dreams and doing these big daunting things. Look how far it’s taken you! You’re remarkable. It’s amazing how different life can turn out than we imagine. You’ve got a beautiful life going, lady.
35 is a great milestone- continue to do what makes you happy and that you feel contribute making the world a better place. Enjoy every minute.
I’ll be 35 in 2 weeks so happy 35 to us! One of my favorite bits of wisdom is from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, “Don’t Panic!” It works for many situations.
Happy birthday! My only wisdom is to act with compassion.
YOLO
Happy Birthday, Joy! May this year bring even more wisdom, and here are some tidbits to start it off: be true to yourself, never stop learning, and, when the situation calls for it, eat dessert first.
My tidbits of advice are:
1.) Listen to and love “Hamilton” (then read the book)
2.) Never stop learning – about things you love, about things you know too little of, about things/people who are different from you
3.) Never underestimate the importance of a good kitchen knife. Kikuichi, FTW!
Happy Birthday! Whoo-hoo for treating yourself; it’s important to do that every once in awhile. My best advice is to follow your heart. It’s not always easy to do and sometimes leads to mistakes, but I think the mistakes are all part of the process. Enjoy your birthday and all the best for your 35th year!
here’s some wisdom i got from my grandpa that’s served me well so far: every day you wake up and make the decision whether it’s going to be a good day or a bad day. i try to remember this on those days where everything seems to go wrong. you can’t control what happens to you but you can always control how you react to it.
happy birthday :)
New adventure advice for your 35th- buy a puppy! ????
My advice: Wear sunscreen and dare to try the scary things every now and then!
Hi Joy, I’m 26 and have always appreciated the vulnerability you offer your followers. I think this is one of your strongest traits! My advice to you going into the next year of your life would be to continue paving the path for women to share their true selves (ugly, beautiful, silly, strange, pathetic, strong, creative, insecure, lovely), and I mean TRUE selves, and let that be your means of leadership.
You’re awesome. Keep going.
Always choose to be happy over being right. It’s just simply not worth it to “win” an argument.
To Joy (so appropriately named) ~ I always remember something I once read: people never remember the words spoken or the actions taken, they just remember how you made them feel. Best birthday wishes from someone a little further ahead on this Mortal Coil. P.S. Go outside and blow some bubbles…big ones! and let the breeze decide where they go…kind of a metaphor for life? Another thing I remember hearing: Want to make God laugh?…tell him your plans!
I think its the close friends that make getting older even better. The ones who are basically family and have been there for the ups and downs.
I’m turning 26 in November and I really embraced this little bit of wisdom this year: Every day might not be good but there is a little bit of good in every day.
Happiest of birthdays to you, sweet friend!
Happy Birthday Joy!
A small bit of wisdom from someone nearly twice your age ……. continue to be you …. your love of life and sharing spirit
are not only a joy to behold they are contagious. And we need more people like you spreading the feeling.
Thanks for You
JD
Happy Birthday Joy! Do what makes you happy & exfoliate!!!
I love how straight to the point your posts are “do it because we’re quality humans..” Continue to be true to your word and never compromise what you want for others, always follow your gut instincts!! I admire your skills & you inspire me!! Although Joy isn’t my birth given name it’s how everyone knows me… Happy birthday, stay sparkly!
Joy
I’m 3 years younger than you and am not sure I have wisdom that you don’t. But when I’m in a place where life feels more like fear and anxiety than like confetti and gratitude, I like to remember the quote, “We are all just balls of energy and mush.” Stick that in your Kitchen Aid and mix it.
Happy Birthday! Never look back with regret. You cannot change the past only the present and the future.
Dearest Joy: Happy birthday and many happy returns!!! Here is my advice, something that has resonated with me – when the going gets tough, just remember that there is no shortcut to any place worth going! Hope you have a great day :)
I turn 35 in August, and if there is one thing that I learned this year it is that it’s important to just be easy on yourself. Interpret that anyway you need to.
Happy Birthday. My pearls of wisdom: Be thankful, be kind, be open to learning from yourself and from others.
Happy Birthday!! My best advice: the guy doesn’t matter until he proves you matter to him.
Since I am 1.5 years older but perhaps not wiser, I would say keep on keepin’ on. Seriously. You got this. Continue to make room for what you love. We are all so appreciative that you do. Happy birthday.
You already sound like you have your head together about age and things so just enjoy life as it comes. There are definitely periods of time that are trying but you need to enjoy the little things even during the hard times. I’m still trying to take my own advice. If I could go back to my 35 year old self I would tell me not to be so hard on myself. Maybe keeping that in mind is a good thing.
Happy Birthday!:) Great post, and I can appreciate that whole thing about not having a “timeline”. I never had one either, I did the things I wanted to do, never really planned anything, and guess what? I did all the school, degrees, and training I wanted, and I’m lucky to have a great career that I enjoy and I regret nothing. I kind of just do what feels right, and go with it. If I would have stayed with my stupid ex-husband (who had his whole life planned out) instead of listening to myself, I’d be stuck at home being a wife and mother to his kids, which would have just killed me! I just turned 37, and my advice is do what you know is going to make YOU happy (not someone else), have no regrets, and don’t apologize for anything–you don’t owe that to anyone.
Floss three times a week, wear sunscreen every day, and don’t ever resolve to give up bread.
Age is just a number.
Congratulations on your milestone! I hope to be living and working with the same joy and intention when I reach that milestone. All the best
:)
The best advice I can give is to remember not everything is worth fighting for or about. But when it is worth it you’ll know it in your heart, and that’s the time you should never, ever stop fighting.
Joy, happy birthday!! I am so thankful for what you bring to this world, including your great writing and ability to make baked goods delicious! My words would be to rest in your 35th year. You’re working so hard, hope you find time to slow down too.
happy birthday, joy!! i’m in a bit of a 31-year-old rut right now so i feel like your wisdom is probably more useful to me than vice versa… but i will say, through all of the doubt and second guessing, surrounding yourself (virtually or in person!) by people who truly love and know you can do wonders for the soul. that, and puppies. lots of puppies. xo
Don’t delay joy.
I’m a huge Brene Brown fan, so I’d just say “dare greatly”
Happy Birthday Joy. I remember that 30th birthday post well as it was packed full of thought-provoking wisdom. I’m almost two decades older than you. Yes, the wrinkles start to happen, but your heart and soul remain the same. Here’s to you xx
Happy Birthday! I’ll be turning 35 in a few months, and I echo all of your sentiments. I guess as the next year approaches, I say just do the best you can and know that it will turn out (how will it? I don’t know. It’s a mystery). Enjoy your diamonds, lady!
Happy Birthday, Joy! Remember to do something for yourself every single day – it will keep you sane and happy ?
Happy Birthday, Joy! Whenever I start to feel older or dare I say old, I remember how I felt 10 years ago. When I was 36 I started to worry about getting older. Now at 46, I try to remember how young 36 really was and that I should embrace 46 because when I’m 56, I’ll look back on today as “wow, I was so young at 46!”
Happy Birthday Joy :)
Being only 23 years of age, i still have a lot to learn, but i believe that people should embrace what they have in the moment rather than regret the past (which we cannot change) or agonize over the future (as things are bound to change).
There are many quotes i could choose, but i’d think that having a creative flair is always something to be proud of, which i see in so many of your recipes – from mixing sweet foods with salty ones; to exploring new textures. So in terms of advice, i would say keep doing what you’re doing and don’t let anyone or anything tell you otherwise. Your food blogging success proves that :)
“The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
? Sylvia Plath
Alex
Continue to be grateful and shine bright like a diamond. Make your mark and leave a trail of sparkle as you go. Be bold and creative. Color your world.
I always look most forward to your Sunday posts. Oh, so here’s one more thing to keep in mind as we age… Keep loving Sundays (and sundaes!)
My Goal for 2016 (but I think it applies to all years) is to be more open. Open to new people, things, food and the parts of myself I usually close off to the world. It’s scary and sometimes (alotoftimes) I cry in my kitchen (my emotional safe place) because I’m scared. But it’s also exhilarating and so, so rewarding. I’ve built some amazing relationships this year that have taught me things about myself I’ve never known, just from opening myself up, vulnerabilities and all. So that’s my advice- be open!
Oh and never stop posting ever because your blog is too good and what else would I do with my free time??
happy birthday! today is my birthday too!
i love this post – i think it’s so important to remember that things always don’t go according to your “plan” and you just have to roll with what the universe brings you.
Happy Happy Birthday Joy!! You are certainly a creative cooking genius. Thank you for all you do. My advise is to always stay true to who you are in all areas of your life. Pick and choose your battles And never ever let anyone dull your SPARKLE!!! :-) Enjoy your day and your year!!
I love a good proverb, and here’s one I’ve been thinking on this year:
“Good sense makes one slow to anger,
and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” [Proverbs 19:11]
Here’s to a beautiful year of good sense and not being easily offended!
Happy Birthday!!! May Birthdays are the best!! I am hitting the big 30th milestone in just a few days and I am getting a sorts of sappy about it. The best advice (not birthday related) that I’ve gotten in the past few years was: “Do not wish for your old life, for it is gone. Accept that this is your new reality and move forward.” This was said to me by a family friend when my mom had a horrible life threatening accident and my entire life changed. Now that she has recovered, things are different, I am different, and I say this to myself not in a negative way, but to remind me that moving forward is all that we get to do in this life and we better make the most of it.
Have a great birthday and cheers to celebrating you!
I feel less like I need to give you wisdom, and more like I glean so much grace-filled wisdom from the things that you have to say. Something I’ve been learning is that a painted masterpiece is made one small brush stroke at a time. A beautiful statue isnt made by smashing through stone. It is made little by little as the Artist chips away each flake with intention and patience. A mountain isnt climbed by racing to the top, breath held. It is reached step by aching step, groaning, breathing deeply, clinging to the side sometimes, resting for a moment so that the next step can be reached. But the joy, the pride in work done well, the confidence that there is nothing you cannot do, no height you cannot reach, is worth each moment, each small movement forward, each re-gathering when you fall back, and the resolve to pull yourself up to where you were before, because nothing, NOTHING will bring you down from the mountain you are climbing. Thank you for the love you put into this world.
~stinaleen
Happy birthday, Joy! I admit that I don’t have much wisdom to impart, as I seem to be more aware of how little I know the more I learn about life. My only wisdom is that it’s alright to not have a fixed plan. You can acknowledge all that you don’t know and continue working hard to make sure that, at least in this moment, you are doing something you love and believe in and are surrounded by those you love and who love you back.
Happy birthday, Joy! Thank you for the opportunity to win. My advice for you is to be open – open to new experiences and open to the truth – and to open your thoughts to other people, no matter how hard that may be for you or them. Working on that last one myself at the moment.
I am turning 35 in September and agree with you to let life happen. It is more fun that way!
The advice that I can offer is something from Amy Poehler: “Vulnerability is the key to happiness. Vulnerable people are powerful people.” Still trying to enact this. Happy birthday. Thank you for your writing and baking genius and the courage to put it out there.
:) it must be a May birthday thing not planning the big stuff, taking it all in stride and as it comes, walking round the obstacles that really wont budge instead of trying to climb over them.
I am a May birthday and a few years older than you – we go where the wind blows us, settle when we feel it is the right thing to do and somehow we know when it is right and keep on dreaming and seeing the pleasant and good stuff in life while overlooking the dark stuff – Karma is important so keep it close and treasure it.
Keep dreaming Joy and love each and every minute of this journey we call life xoxo
Happy Birthday! Treat yourself with the kindness and compassion you would treat someone you love – especially when the going gets rough. Also, (continue to) trust yourself.
Happy birthday, Joy! Next month, I turn 63. Not so old, but not so young any more either. The piece of wisdom that has helped me whenever I feel afraid or disappointed is from George Eliot from the book “Adam Bede”. “Our deeds determine us as much as we determine our deeds.” So, if you want to be a kind person, behave kindly, if you want to be courageous, behave like that. We are in charge of our own selves. Have a wonderful birthday and a fabulous year.
Don’t hold other people to the same standards you have for yourself.
I’m still learning to live by this advice.
Happy birthday, Joy! I appreciate you and I wish you the drive to continue on your unplanned path and the heart-bursting happiness that comes from believing in yourself and making something great. My own big milestone (40th) birthday is this weekend and I’m in the midst of my own life shift: leaving a career, starting a creative business, enrolling in yoga teacher training… 40 is going to be an amazing year and I wish the same for you and your 35th.
While it may seem a little cliche, I urge you to not sweat the small stuff and enjoy life’s everyday pleasures (like food!!). Happy Birthday!
Wishing you the happiest of Birthdays! John Lennon said, “Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.” Your optimism truly shines through, I’d say you have plenty to count. Keep inspiring and spreading your Joy! :)
– Allison (alliemacxo)
Everything can be solved with 3 deep breaths!
Happy birthday to you! My wisdom for you is that you should always be strong for yourself. No one else will always be with you for support and if you can stand on your own two feet no matter how hard the wind is blowing, you can handle anything. Oh and eat a doughnut. Life is short.
Happy birthday Joy! My favorite quote/piece of advice is “Put blinders on to those things that conspire to hold you back. Especially the ones in your head!”
I think the biggest piece of wisdom I’ve heard lately is that timing is often luck – not because of any fault within ourselves. There’s no lack in us, no fault, no “missing piece”. A lot of it is just timing. And a lot of timing is just happenstance and luck with a pinch of God thrown in. And that’s okay.
Happy Birthday Joy! Savor every moment of every day and have faith in yourself that you are following the path that was meant for you :).
Happy Birthday! Continue to do what you love. And wear sunscreen…
Do it with passion or not at all.
Happy Birthday!
Happy bday girlfriend! My advice: breathe deeply and floss nightly.
Happy birthday Joy! My advice to you: DO YOU. (yes, I got it from the Jersey Shore, sometimes wisdom comes in the most strangest of places)
I am 33…. I am learning that living in the moment helps you enjoy the little things so much more. I am a planner, but trying to let go of that ( to an extent). Once I had kids I slowly have let things fall into place on there own!
Happy Birthday Joy! My birthday advice to you is to remember to breathe regardless of what is going on around you, and that pink wine is always appropriate, regardless of the season :)
Happy Birthday!! Enjoy 35! My advice is to make sure and do one thing nice for yourself everyday. We get so caught up in life we forget to stop and appreciate it. Xoxo
Happy, happy birthday, Joy!
I’m an impressive three months ahead of you into this “turning 35” gig, and I’m pleased to report that I have exactly zero wisdom to pass on.
This is a beautiful place in life, isn’t it? Adulting (mostly) like a champ, equipped to tackle deep philosophical questions (“so…I bought this fresh butter at the Amish market. What can I make that allows me to eat 90% of it in one sitting?), finally appreciative of all the bumps and bruises and stumbles that have led to this point…and totally justified in toasting 35-and-no-timelines with a nice whiskey and possibly (probably) something oozing with chocolate. Rock those new earrings, pretty lady. 35 is allllllll you.
You are such an inspiration to me! I get so bogged down and overwhelmed that I have a hard time getting started in all things in life. Thank you for pushing yourself everyday and thank you for talking about hard times too. It’s so nice to see “real” sometimes. Advice! I’m turning 29 today, so lets see what advice I can pull out…I guess I’ll leave you with something I’m working on: Self-worth is determined not by what you do, how much you make, how you look, etc. You simply are worthy because you are here, living and breathing. You rock, girl. Keep fighting the good fight and Happy Birthday!!
You have about 4.5 months on me. My wisdom? Remember that sleep makes most things seem better.
Happy Birthday Joy! I will share my favorite words of wisdom…Don’t wait for a special occasion. Every day of your life is a special occasion. (AKA open that champagne!)
I turn 35 in a two short months, so I’m not sure I have any wisdom to offer you, other than to keep doing what you are doing. I love your blog, your recipes, your sass, your honesty, and I love watching you and your brand grow. It is inspiring. I have my own little (very little) business and brand that I’ve been slowly nurturing between kids and day job, and watching yours grow inspires me to keep mine going. so thank you. and happy birthday.
Oh man – you seem like you’re doing exactly what you should be doing, so I don’t know what advice you need! Keep doing what you want to be doing, what scares you and what comforts you. I read an article that really resonated about not trying to be “happy” – it’s so ephemeral and dependent on multiple factors. Try to be useful – to make a difference in whatever way you can. Baking and sharing food, telling stories, donating and volunteering – nothing makes us happier than when we feel like we’re making a difference, on whatever scale we can. You’re an incredible person with such an open heart and an AMAZING baker (we all benefit from that!). Happy happy birthday, Joy – may your namesake fill your days.
Happy Birthday! My advice is to always be yourself – all your previous experiences and memories make you uniquely you, and it would be a shame to waste it by trying to be someone else! Eat, drink and live in the way that makes you most happy
Happy Happy Birthday! i think those diamond earrings that you bought for yourself will forever be one of your most prized possessions. And for good reason. Enjoy them! I’m older than you, but I remember 35 very, very well. Here is my motto, brief yet succinct: Just Keep Swimming.
Wishing you many more happy birthdays! – Marcia
Happy birthday, Joy! You’ve always been one of my favorite bloggers and truly an inspiration. I turned 35 this year too and have never been happier. Everyone has already given you loving, perfect life advice so let mine be about beauty. After all, beauty – internal and external – is one of life’s greatest gifts, too! So my advice is: anti-aging serum. Go to Sephora and splurge on a premium bottle, and complement your forever diamond :) xo
Happy Birthday Joy!!!!!!!! I’m turning 35 in a few days also, you are a great inspiration and I wish you all the best and continued success.
I am not wise, but I do love to quote the wise, so I will share this:
“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.” -Hafiz
Happy happy happy birthday, Joy. You fill up one of the brightest corners of the Internet. I hope someone makes you as happy as you make your readers.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Keys to success! Gratefulness & cookies, always.
Happiest of birthdays! My advise is keep at it. Sounds like you’re doing wonderful in the self-care department. Also, p.s., it might be time to resurrect the podcast with all your wisdom…just sayin…mostly that we can’t get enough of you!
My best advice is really only my favorite quote (by Howard Thurman):
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
I hope you had a great birthday! And mega kudos to you for doing something nice for yourself! Love the earrings!
Joy – you are killing it! Happy Birthday. I just turned 30 so I really have no advice, but I sure do love this post. I just went through a major, unexpected life change (ahem…divorce). I have this new sense of determination and pride in myself that I didn’t have in my 20s. Every day I wake up and try to be the best human I can be. Some days I feel like I’m really doing it – giving back, working hard, kicking ass, being the mom I need to be. But, you know, some days I feel like I’m just a disaster. Here is the great thing I have learned this year – that is okay! It is okay to stumble and mess up. Perfection is NOT the goal here. Since I have no advice, I will leave you with a quote from one of my favs, Anna Quindlen. I want to be her when I grow up :). Again, happy birthday and congrats on all of your much deserved success.
“Someday, sometime, you will be sitting somewhere. A berm overlooking a pond in Vermont. The lip of the Grand Canyon at sunset. A seat on the subway. And something bad will have happened: You will have lost someone you loved, or failed at something at which you badly wanted to succeed. And sitting there, you will fall into the center of yourself. You will look for some core to sustain you. And if you have been perfect all your life and have managed to meet all the expectations of your family, your friends, your community, your society, chances are excellent that there will be a black hole where that core ought to be. I don’t want anyone I know to take that terrible chance. And the only way to avoid it is to listen to that small voice inside you that tells you to make mischief, to have fun, to be contrarian, to go another way. George Eliot wrote, ‘It is never too late to be what you might have been.’ It is never too early, either.”
—Anna Quindlen, Being Perfect
Happy birthday! At my last bday I was feeling crappy about getting “old” and I read something that changed my perspective: “The greatest gift is the opportunity to grow old.” Each year we’re given is truly something to be thankful for!
My advice comes courtesy of the (amazing) podcast Another Round: drink some water, call your mom, take your meds.
Happy birthday :)
I think some of the best tools you can carry with you are flexibility, curiosity, and compassion. Life goes on with its ups and downs and flexibility reminds you that you can roll with whatever happens, even if you can’t always prepare for it. Curiosity keeps you endlessly youthful, better than any wrinkle cream. And compassion is the bridge that connects hearts and minds. Sprinkle in some independence (because we all need to make our own dreams come true) and a lot of laughter and you’ll always be your best. Love, love, love those earrings and I love that you bought them for yourself even more. Happy birthday, Joy! xo
Happy birthday Joy! The best piece of advice I’ve heard lately is to think of your life as a movie and ask yourself – is it one you’d want to watch?
Happy birthday!
A yoga instructor recently said at the end of class to think of each breath as an opportunity to reset and restart. I loved that, and haven’t yet stopped thinking about it in moments of frustration. Each moment is a new opportunity.
The only advice I can give is my favorite quote, by Howard Thurman:
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Happy Birthday!! Do something that makes you come alive!
Happy birthday!
Feel gratitude this year. For big things, for small things. For mundane things. For the things you have, for the people you know.
Hurray for 35! Hurray for another year!
The learning never ends. Take time to nurture your soul.
Yay for birthdays! Idk about wisdom but here’s something I’ve learned that you can hopefully take away as well: Know when it’s important to have someone else do things in your life. Specifically – do the things only you can do because time is finite. Someone else can be paid to clean the house, mow the lawn, deliver your dry cleaning. I’ve spent too much time loathing the time these things take or feeling guilty for having someone else do them but that’s crazy because need to make the most of my time and what only I can do.
Joy, your blog has been my favorite place on the internet for so many years. I remember reading your 30th birthday post, and I cannot believe that that was four years ago! I wish you the happiest of birthdays. I love that you bought yourself diamonds. In my 21 years on this earth I have not learned as much as I would have liked to, but I do know that it is important to indulge yourself on a whim here and there. Whether it’s buying yourself flowers, or having a popsicle for breakfast, make your life fun whenever you can.
HBD! My advice…I have a list of questions to which the answer is always “yes,” and I recommend making such a list to anyone, and taking a look at it whenever you feel adrift. My list includes:
Should I go outside? (Yes!)
Should I call my mom or sisters? (YES!)
Should I have some chocolate? (I mean, yes. Duh.)
Should I spend some time right now having a coffee and a read? (Yes.)
Should I find a way to get out on the water today? (I’m in the Coast Guard and am an avid kayaker, so YES.)
Make a list! Say yes!
Happy Birthday Joy! Never settle :)
Happy birthday
live simply, live more, expect less
Happy Birthday to you. Please continue to stay true to what moves you and continue to take risks. Nourish your friendships, they have been with you and will continue to offer support. Offer yourself the same compassion you give others. You are uniquely you and we are the better for it.
Happy Birthday Joy!
One of my favorite quotes is “Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today!” Basically, don’t worry about the past (or the future) and live for today! Though, I think you’ve already gotten this one figure out :) Love your blog and all that amazing jewelry from Luna Skye (omg!!)
Happy birthday you lovely human, you! I’m coming up on thirty and I’ve read your post from five years ago several times and still laugh at a different truth each time. For this year, my best advice is to simply surround yourself with the kindest people you know, this applies to dating, too. One can never have too much kindness in their life, and it doesn’t become exhausting or dull after a while. Xo Hailey
Sunblock, exercise, water, spending time with children (though they don’t have to be yours), time in nature, multiple readings of the Harry Potter books and laughing. I wish you the most wonderful year Joy!!! Though I’m about 20 years older than you, I’ve learned a great deal from you!! xoxox
Happy birthday Joy! I still have a couple years until 35, but it sounds like you are doing everything right! My only advice would be to keep making decisions based on what will bring you happiness.
happy birthday!! keep being great!
The lesson I’ve been really stewing over recently: Ask yourself where the other person is coming from. Ask yourself why they are or aren’t saying, doing, feeling, giving the way they are. Is it coming from a place of insecurity, wanting what’s best for you, ignorance, fear, love? It’s made a huge difference for me in terms of how I approach a lot of conversations and how I absorb a lot of what I see. I don’t always remember to do this, but when I do… it makes a difference. Happy birthday, Joy! Thank you for being a smile source.
Happy Birthday from one 35 year old to another. Coffee. Always drink coffee.
I have two pieces of advice that I wish someone had told me when I was 35 or better yet, 25:
“A wise woman once said ‘Fuck this Shit’ – and she lived happily ever after” and “The World is Beautiful and Terrible, Don’t Be Afraid.”
Happy Birthday Joy!!!
I’m a few years younger than you are, but I had an amazing teacher years ago who told all of us to put our worries into a four box grid. The axes were important/not important and controllable/uncontrollable. Then she told us to cross off all the uncontrollable and not important ones, and to do what we could about the rest. Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday I just love to read your posts and perspectives.
The following words have always helped me:
If you have to choose between being kind or being right always choose being kind because then you will always be right.
I’ve always regretted not getting diamond earrings enjoy them!!
Happy birthday! I try to live by both of my parents’ mottoes. My mom says that life should be an adventure, and my dad says that life is all about balance. Between the two of them, they’re having a great time.
When I was 35, I wish someone had told me to “Never love someone who treats you like you were ordinary.” Well, maybe someone did tell me that, but I wish I’d listened. :) I bet you have all that jazz sorted, though–I was a late bloomer! I am 46 now, and the happiest I’ve ever been. Cheers to you on this special day. xx
Happy Birthday Joy! I’ve followed you for years and I’m so happy for you! My only words of “wisdom” would be just keep doing what you’re doing. You’re making your dreams come true and it doesn’t get much better than that! ?
Happy birthday!
I love reading all your posts. Don’t have much in the way of advice, but one quote that I find useful is this “When I look back on my life, I see pain, mistakes, and heartache. When I look in the mirror, I see strength, learned lessons, and pride in myself.”
Hope you have a wonderful year!!
P
Happy birthday! The best advice I’ve gotten come from two of my dear friends (both of whom are wonderful and inspiring mentors for me both personally and professionally.) One is to do all things with kindness. Act from your heart and good things will follow. The second piece of advice is to fake it til you make it. Took me a while to realize that being an adult didn’t necessarily mean you have it all together, moreso you know yourself and what you want and then make it upas you go along! :) Sending best wishes for an absolutely fabulous day!!
Happy Birthday Joy! My wisdom of the day would be that sometimes, what feels like an awful thing turns out to change your life in a really positive way, so always be open to change :)
I try to remind myself of this quote by Pablo Picasso often:
My mother said to me, ‘If you are a soldier, you will become a general. If you are a monk, you will become the Pope.’ Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
Be Joy. You have already nailed it. :) happy birthday
Happy Happy Birthday Joy! I’m nearly there as well ;) My 2cents of advice: Be true to yourself, always have a bro (https://open.spotify.com/track/6NunWZuZ6g9KipJ9Q5Vck7) and don’t be afraid to take the scenic route once in awhile :) Hugs!
I’m currently telling every lady I know to read Jen Hatmaker’s book “For the Love” – or just read anything by her! She is hilarious and real and doesn’t try to put up any fronts. I learned the beauty of vulnerability and embracing the individuality in myself and others, rather than trying to compete to be good at everything, just because that’s what media says we should do. Happy 35th, Joy!! Thank you for pursuing your dreams and facing your fears, and encouraging us to do the same!
Wow, Joy, I don’t think I have any advice to give you (since I’m only 24), but I’m impressed with the way you live life. You are happy, blunt, feisty, and joyful. You are true to yourself. I think you don’t need any of our advice because the best advice is within your gut, and it seems like you’re already listening!
Happiest of birthdays to you. My advice eternally is to immerse yourself in beauty. For me, that is poetry and the written word. For you that may be something different (your baking is a treat for all the senses).
Be present. It’s simple, but it’s the one thing I remind myself of daily.
I like your 35 year old wisdom–make your own dreams come true. (You just bought a house! Badass!) I turned 35 exactly two weeks ago, on May 11th, and my meditation has been similar: love yourself. Specifically–be kind in my self-talk, make the healthy choice, and honor my ambitions. I want to write a book of essays. Daunting! But I’m honoring this by trying, by working, because loving myself means respecting an outrageous goal. And then working for it.
You certainly are on the right track! I’m in my sixth decade and am finally embracing what I what. My advise – don’t rely on others for your happiness. Do what it takes to get what you want – do, ask, take!
you seem to have it pretty much down, but I guess just be true to yourself, love everyone and (you already do this) eat well. xo Happy Birthday!
You’re already there. The 30’s are the best years. Enjoy it and take care of yourself.
Happy birthday Joy, 35 is a great year, I should know add another 30+ to that for me. Enjoy your day, as
I enjoy your blog.
Happy happy birthday! I have loved reading your blog for the past five years. Going along with a common (but so real) theme, I think the best wisdom out there is to love yourself. Everything falls into place behind that.
I recently read a quote that I loved: “life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.” I think that is a great reminder to anyone!
Enjoy!!!!! first and foremost.
Happy birthday, 35 seems to be a great number!
I think we can all be better at being as kind to ourselves, as we are to our friends. Don’t be too harsh on yourself!
Hey Joy,
You’ve been filling my belly with your dad’s sweet potato pie for years now, and showing me what’s important to you in your world every Sunday morning. Thank you. I feel like I have a very cool little sister out there somewhere (thenks Fivel!), and I’m super proud of how you bake and walk in the world. (I think Phyllis Grant is my next oldest little sister out there :P) )
My advice?
Play with children as much as possible. Never forget how to play.
Talk with teenagers as much as they’ll let you. Never forget how to feel intensely.
And listen to the wise elders in your life. Never forget that to someone else you will always be a child.
Be grateful. For the crunchy and the smooth. It’s all telling you something.
Big hugs.
Dido
Appreciate every day! (which you already seem to be doing)
Enjoy every day!
Happy birthday! Keep doin what you’re doin, lady! Fun to see your life and tastes evolve and especially love hearing about your NOLA adventures. Always be where your feet are :)
Happy birthday, Joy! I was once told, when the devil can’t have you, he’ll make you busy. Enjoy today!
Happy birthday, Joy! My great words of wisdom? Embrace life-don’t just get through each day working your way to the end. Do this life up good!
Happy Birthday Joy!! I have really enjoyed reading what you write, and I’m so glad I happened upon you (on Pinterest, I think?). My advice to you is to never miss an opportunity to compliment someone. That’s something I’ve been trying to do. If I like someone’s shirt or hair or puppy, I tell them. It brightens their day and makes me feel bold and confident even though my heart rate goes up at the thought of talking to a stranger. :)
Happy birthday! Never regret growing older – it is a privilege many are denied of.
Instagram: jammymcj
Happy Birthday, Joy. You ARE the baker. The writer. The comedian. I enjoy your stories, and appreciate your commitment to your readers. My advice to you, never quit. ??
Happy Birthday, Joy! Keep following your gut and don’t settle =)
Happy birthday to you! Try to be humble and self aware enough to apologize when you should – for things big and small. If I snap at my husband or my mother, after I’m done being a jerk, I apologize. Same for the big stuff of course, but it almost feels more important for to do so on the little things that can eat away at you or at the people you love. It has help me keep myself grounded and keep my relationships healthy.
You probably already know this… You have to make yourself happy, because if you are waiting for other people to do it for you it will never happen.
That necklace is gorgeous!! Happy birthday!
My advice to myself at 35 was to consider each challenge in terms of how important it might be in 5 years time and then react/act accordingly.
At 60+ I offer you my own mantra – “if not now, when?”, although you seem to do a pretty good job of living fully (nice earbobs, btw). Do it (whatever “it” is) with love, generosity, grace, and style – and, as my autocorrect suggests, with donuts!
Try to find joy in the little moments of life.
Happy Birthday! I don’t feel like I have any words of wisdom to offer (my life is a hot mess!), but I do try to always keep this in mind: kindness matters. Even on the worst of days, a simple smile to and from a stranger can make all the difference, and as long as we are connecting with each other in small ways, the world will be a better place. Another small bit of advice: don’t take your health for granted. That’s an important one, too. I hope your day is filled with lots of that New Orleans sunshine, and of course, cake. Oh, and drinks. Never forget the drinks. <—– Probably the best piece of advice ever! :)
Eat dessert first!!! Enjoy life as it happens!!!
Happy Birthday Joy! Something I’ve learned…Growing up my Mom always loved flowers. She still does. Our garden was always a work in progress and had plenty of weeds. Truthfully more weeds than flowers. She would buy her roses, geraniums, pansies and impatiens, plant them and bask in their glory. The weeds were always present and there was never enough time or energy to pull them all. I never really understood why she wouldn’t get rid of all the weeds before planting the flowers. Then when I turned 30 I thought about it. The moment I really got it, it made me weep. In the garden of life, you have to plant flowers amongst the weeds. Don’t wait for all the weeds to be gone before you sit down and appreciate the beauty and all the Joy that exists now. There’s always going to be weeds…. so keep planting and keep dreaming. Thanks for sharing your Joy xo
Happy Birthday!!! Hmm..I would say “Comparison is the thief of joy”- I have learned that in my later 30s. Run your own race, don’t worry about the others around you.
Happy birthday to you! I follow both on Instagram. Those earrings are STUNNING! Good purchase. I don’t think I can offer any advice that you don’t already seem to know. You seem truly happy. Keep doing what you’re doing.
Cheers to another journey around the sun! Wishing you the best for the year ahead! My nugget of wisdom for you is not my own, but rather from Virginia Woolf (To The Lighthouse).
She writes:
“The great revelation had never come. The great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead there were little daily miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark; here was one.”
She puts it better than I can, so I’ll leave it at that. Cheers to you!!
Meredith
Happiest of happy birthday,s Joy!
Joyeux anniversaire!
Everything in moderation, even moderation. Enjoy this glorious day.
I will turn 31 this year, and so far my 30s have been SO much better than my 20s. My piece of advice, and you probably know this already, is that you can’t make other people do what you want them to. Just let them be themselves, and you do you, and let everyone be happy doing that. Amen.
Happy Birthday! My best piece of advice is the saying: “Don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.” Take care of you, eat something delicious, and have a spectacular day!
Happy Birthday, Joy! I’m exactly one year ahead of you. May 24th is the best day of the year, right in between spring and summer, when it’s sunny and all the prettiest flowers bloom and people like us were born. It’s going to be a great year, Joy! I know you’ll make all those dreams come true.
Happy birthday! I think my best advice is to try to be in it. I have a hard time being in the present and I am always looking to what is next.
The only wisdom I could offer you, is keep doing what you’re doing. Let life happen, as you are. Happy Birthday, Joy! I learn a lot from you!
Happiest of Birthdays! I am a few years behind you, but think wisdom that always holds true is enjoy whatever season of life you’re in. Whether its good, sad, scary, amazing, or crazy – enjoy it & live life to the fullest!
Take joy in the things that you love, don’t let others make you feel silly for it, because they like silly things too. Love whole heartedly, keep those close friends close, & call your mom.
Birthday advice from the slightly off side of 50: laugh as.much as you can. Things will always go up and down and left and right, so find the humor and joy and let the rest roll on by. It’s the laughter that you remember.
Joy, Happy 35th Birthday! Your website continues to be one of my favorites; I love your style. Seems like you have some great advice for us. My advice, which I had to learn the hard way, is not to judge (that judging is more a reflection of my feelings than anyone else). But for a lighter piece of advice: smile!
Happy 35th Joy! My wisdom comes from my mom (and I think originally John Lennon…)
Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.
This is what I tell myself as I sit watching my eighth hour of The French Open, with my umpteenth bowl of ice cream. You owe justification to nobody for how you spend your days!
xx
Happy birthday! I’m 35 too, so my advice/wisdom/nugget of information is not as seasoned-with-years’-experience as some might be – that said, it’s excellent advice and I borrowed it from JM Barrie anyway. ???? Always be a little kinder than necessary.
To the bank teller, to the grouchy checkout clerk, to your always-late friend, to your most selfless friend, to your parents, and to yourself!
I’m 35 – and this is my favourite age so far. I totally thought i’d be a wrinkled up old lady by 35 – but – this is by far the best I’ve ever felt in my entire life. There is something so wonderful about feeling like you finally know yourself. Use 35 as a a time to really get to know yourself. And always follow my Dad’s favourite piece of advice : “its easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission”
Happy Birthday Joy!
Only let positive people into your life–there’s no time for any negative!
Eat more cake… happy birthday Joy!
I think you already know this but… You have to make yourself happy, don’t wait around for other people to do it for you!
Happy birthday! I turned 35 last month and what I want to tell you is to simply be happy with yourself and comfortable with who you are. C’est tout! :)
Happy Birthday, and what a lovely post.
Don’t try too hard to hard to control your hair during a New Orleans summer! (Coming from a life-long New Orleanian) Happy Birthday!!!
The thing is, the mere fact that you are open, seeking bits of advice and insight from others (strangers, really), shows the wisdom you possess. Being willing to listen, receive what (a really diverse lot of) others have to share and trusting yourself to sift out the gems, the things you want to incorporate into your life and to discard the chaff … you’re already living out the best piece of wisdom I could give.
Happy Birthday! 35 is just over 6 months away for me so I’m reading all of these words or wisdom oh so carefully. For me, the most important thing I’ve learned in my 34.5 years here is to not take things too seriously. Life can be serious and big and scary and amazing and happy and at the end of the day you have to smile and enjoy each moment and experience. The good for what they are and the bad for what they teach us and how we grow from them.
PS. I also bought myself diamond earrings a few years back. Best decision ever! Bling yo’self :P
Happy birthday! I hope that I’m this year and years to come, you can find boy and beauty in the small things that make out lives. Happy 35th!
happy birthday! I’m turning 37 in a few (short) weeks but a few months before I turned 36, I wrote a list of thirty-six before 36 things to do. I love lists and it was fun to try and check things off. Enjoy the year.
Here are the results:
https://meghanrushtonjournal.com/2015/06/08/onward-upward-and-over-the-hill/
I am happily following you and Luna Skye on Instagram
Happy Birthday Joy…a piece of wisdom hard as I feel like you are already wiser than I was at 35 (I’m almost 45…) but the one thing I know is that time seems to move faster and faster so live fully, laugh often, love well…Cheers!
Happy Birthday, Joy! May your day and year be filled with many delightful and delicious adventures. I vaguely remember 35 – and the advice I’d pass along to you comes from my Grandma Ruby, she of blessed memory, and who lived to be 98! She said, “Child, always be thankful for the gift of THIS day. Be kind and gracious, and always follow your heart.” May you follow your heart, Joy…
You might not be happy everyday, but you can always be joyful. Ha, that’s fitting for you Joy, I never even thought about your name, this is just something I try to remember everyday. Happy birthday Joy!
Whenever you’re deciding to do something, let peace be your guide. Happy birthday!!!!
Keep being you. Because everyone else is taken. For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.
My advice, from 20+ years older, would be to keep doing what you’re doing and have no regrets!
Happiest birthday!
Happiest of birthdays! My advice, which you’re clearly nailing, is to treat yourself. More specifically – and most importantly – splurge. Daily. And put salt on your sweet things…. because we only live once!
Happy birthday Joy! I’ve loved reading all the birthday wisdom in the comments too. Something I’ve learned recently is that true gratitude doesn’t include guilt. Being grateful for the gazillion wonderful things in life doesn’t have to always come before “I have no reason not to do better!” Be grateful and be happy!!
Joy you are on a good path because it’s your path. On Tuesday I will make 50 years of age and what words of wisdom I can offer are these: Know yourself. When you do you can know others and have full exoeriences which seem important to you! I have done things out of the sequence that I wasn’t aware of but others were. First child st 38, second at 41. Glad I know myself because I swim in the mommy pool oft alone in the deep end as others live according to that secret sequence which breeds success. I won’t lie whether it’s your zen or not–motherhood is a love unequalled. It has healed over so many nicks and bruises unexpectedly. We are all crazy about your work over here! So keep on truckin sista!
As someone way past 35: Every year has its blessings and challenges. Enjoy them and learn from them all. Many happy returns of the day!
Do yoga to stay flexible and strong. Your 65 year old self will thank you.
Always eat the marshmallows first! Wisdom for the ages.
littlebearries on Instagram.
Happy birthday! I’m a few months behind you in age and not really sure I’m qualified to be giving any advice.
I love your writing and thoroughly enjoy the blog!
I love that you bought yourself those earrings, way to go!! My advice would be that while you will not be happy all the time, everyday, you can always be joyful, so strive to find the joy in every day.
Happy 35! Keep spreading joy!
Happy Birthday, Joy!
Love deeply and live with purpose (which you already do)
Lift weights and pay attention to those triceps so you don’t have saggy arms like me.
So glad you bought your diamond earrings! I threw a petting zoo party for myself this year (I’m 33)… Life is short so just do the damn thing…(whatever the “thing” is for you…) loved you birthday perspective! (On insta as @em_c_nola) Cheers!
A very happy birthday from me to you…I turn 35 tomorrow, so wonderful wishes from a fellow Gemini!
I will pass along the best piece of advice I’ve ever received – always do what is in your best interests, because it is most often in the best interests of everyone else, too.
With gratitude from me to you for amazing blog, openess, and particularly your recipes for buttermilk biscuits and strawberry pie.
Happy birthday Joy! My advice is to always embrace change with the focus on what you have to gain rather than what you’re losing. Also, always be kind, especially to yourself. Have a wonderful day!
Happy birthday to you, Joy!
Love deeply and live each day with purpose
Let go of things that weigh you down.
Lift weights and pay attention to those triceps so you don’t have saggy arms when you’re 48 (like me)
I have a LOT of wrinkles and am waaaay past 35. I don’t know that I would presume to give you advice, but if I could tell my younger self something it would be along the lines of Be true to your own inner compass and your guiding star, and give yourself the grace to change whatever in life starts not working. Happy birthday, and I looked at that necklace and wow, did you pick a stunner to do as a giveaway. Wear those sparkly earrings and do ’em proud!
Happiest birthday wishes, Joy. 35 is a great number and one which should be bragged on! Life serves us lemons and curve balls and the best way to handle both is to keep it real and use them for good!! Lemonade and baseball…it’s this thing called life! Enjoy the day, smell the roses or daisies or honeysuckle.
Found and followed on Instagram. I turned 50 this year and realized that by the time my grandmother was 50, she was, well, a grandmother! I thought she was so old when I was a kid! Someone recently told my parents that even though they don’t have grandchildren, they have two wonderful daughters and that our Nana would be so proud of us(she passed away in 2009). So, my wisdom is to be the person your grandmother would be proud of, which I don’t think is very hard at all since grandparents are inherently proud of their grandchildren.Ultimately, it boils down to being proud of yourself, no matter what! Oh, and vacation rule #1- EAT ICE CREAM EVERY DAY!
Happy Birthday Joy. May your adventures continue to embrace and fulfill you. You bring us JOY in many
ways and we celebrate this milestone with you. Continue to grow your wisdom and know that life is a
struggle for all. With your gifts, talents, humor and discipline, you’ll celebrate another year with many successes.
And blessings to your family, too…I love when your post include connectivity with them. Cheers!
Happy birthday! I’m not 35 (or even 30), but here’s some advice anyways: a cup of tea can fix almost anything. Also, do what makes you happy! Have a great year, Joy!
Happy Birthday Joy! Age is nothing but a number. If you view yourself as a young woman and enjoy each day with youth in your heart than you may forever be young.
xo Sandra
Happy Birthday Joy! I wish you to remain that optimistic throughout your life!!!!!
Happy B’day! Just know, that as a woman, the best is yet to come!!
I turned 40 this year, and my big realization was that it is more important to be strong than skinny. I only have this one body, and I am going to focus on keeping it healthy and strong and quit worrying so much about losing weight. Feeling good is what matters. Love your blog!
That jewelry is amazing!!
Wisdom: appreciate the moments of bliss, ride the waves in between.
My best life advice comes from women who are older than I am. My advice: sit with them, talk to them, learn from them. They’ve been here before and can tell you what’s normal and you should chill out about, what’s normal because society is unjust, and what is simply wrong. Invite them to tea, invite them to coffee, have a group of them over for dinner with your friends closer to your age.
Happy Birthday Joy! I am reaching the ripe old age of 60 this year! THe key to a successful life is to live each day to its fullest! Make sure you laugh every dat. Just enjoy every day to its fullest
Have a great year!
Bootst
Happy Birthday! I’ll just leave this here:
https://www.wnyc.org/story/2-dope-queens-podcast-episode-9-clench
The advice is in the yoga part <3
Also you are wonderful, and your sunday posts are part of my sunday morning ritual.
happy birthday and thanks for introducing me to a new jewelry brand–the earrings are gorgeous!
dream big and travel often!
Happy Birthday to you! My advice is always take time for yourself to nourish your soul.
Best advice ever from Andy Dufrane (Shawshank Redemption) “Get busy living or get busy dying”! Love it!
My mantra in life is from the philosopher Goethe — “Do not hurry, do not rest.” When life seems to overwhelm me I usually am either doing too much or not enough. Balance my dear! And happy birthday!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! So happy that you have treated yourself to something so beautiful, timeless & meaningful :) my advice to you is….”do you”. Do what makes YOU happy, what makes YOU feel good, keep on following YOUR passions/dreams/goals; look how far it’s brought you, and what an incredible journey you’ve had thus far – with even more surely to come.
Cheers to you!
Happy birthday Joy! My advice would be: Never listen to the advice of random strangers on the internet. Haha. Hope your 35th year is a great one (starting it off right with gorgeous diamonds!!)
Happy Happy Birthday! My 36 year advice to you: you do you. Everything else will follow. :)
Happy Birthday Joy dear! I’m coming up on 35 this year too and feel like it’s a good age.
The best thing I’ve learned so far (and am working hard to internalize this year) is to be kind with yourself. You are doing the best you can and are trying so very hard to win at this living life thing. Treat yourself with kindness. Diamonds are a gret way to remember that! ????
Happy Birthday! I love that you bought yourself something so special. I just turned 40. It just floors me how time is going by so fast. As I get older, I am always reminded about how much I don’t know. Plus how important the people in my life are and how they won’t be around forever. I want to try to spend as much time as I can with them. Have a great year!
Sleep in at least once a week!
Happy birthday, Joy! My advice is to keep celebrating yourself every year like you did for this one! :)
Happy Birthday Joy, I am almost twice your age, Never “settle” don’t accept anything just to have it… a house, a significant other, or a brownie…. make it the right one, so worth it. And don’t sweat the small stuff, and in the big picture, it is all small!
Happy Birthday Joy! I remember reading your 30th birthday post a few times and soaking up the wisdom. I feel like I’ve been following in this journey with you the past 6 or so years and it feels very special! One thing I like to remind myself of is “Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind”.
Happy Happy Birthday! I love this post; I could have written much of the same. My 36 year advice to you: you do you. It’s not worth it to try otherwise. The rest will follow. :)
Happy Birthday Joy!
You are exactly where you should be. Enjoy the ride.
Happy birthday! No real advise because it seems like you have it together, just keep doing what you’re doing and live the life you want to live!
Wisdom is hard to give to someone already so wise. I suppose just keep taking part in the ongoing creation of the world, don’t take things too seriously and give yourself a break every now and then ’cause we are always hardest on ours levels. Xo
Happy Birthday, Joy
Live simply, love deeply – let things go that weigh you down, whether it be possessions or past transgressions. Remember that you are a child of God – and he is holding your hand. You are never alone. Never.
Yes…go after the things you want to do! And live in the moment doing them! Happy 35.
Happy Birthday! Nourish yourself, Cherish each moment, and Trust and have Faith in God. Much love to you.
Hello Joy! Happy 35th! My bit of wisdom is an oldie but works for me..ask for forgiveness not permission
Feliz cumpleaños, Joy!!!!
As a two-year-older than you I don’t have much advice to give you.
But if I have to say something is to live life fully and laugh all you can and not to worry too mucha about the silly stuff ;)
I hope you have a GREAT year ahead
Kisses from Spain!
P.S.: I’ve never ever ever owned a diamond… OMG!!! jaja
P.S.2: Maybe you see this comment twice… I don’t know what’s wrong with my computer.. ugh!
Happy Birthday!! I don’t think I’ve reached a point where I could be considered wise or sage but here’s my sage wisdom to you: there’s no ‘right’ way to live or place in life to be. There’s just what’s right for you and only you know what that is, not your age :)
Feliz cumpleaños, Joy!!!! As a two-year-older than you… I don’t have any advice to give you.
But if I have to say something… just enjoy life and laugh, LAUGH all you can and be the happiest you can be without worrying too much about the small stuff!
Kisses from Spain!!!
P.S.: I’ve never ever ever owned a diamond!!! OMG!!! :D haha
Happy Birthday Joy! I hope today and everyday you remember that you are always enough! Regardless of the work you do and the people you have in your life, you are worthy of love and happiness and all good things!
My advice is to live in the moment and laugh as much as possible. And eat great food – you only live once :)
Happy for you to enjoy those diamonds! Happy birthday Joy!
The sun will always rise and set so let the things you can’t control pass without too much fret.
Eat chocolate.
Happy happy birthday! You’re such an inspiration.
Happy Birthday! I truly enjoy your blog as it feels so very friendly. Keep yourself grounded and you will keep your connection to us. Thank you for being you!
Happy birthday joy! I’m approaching 30 myself and not sure what wisdom I really have to pass on – I’ve always taken much the same approach to life as you, not planning out every little milestone, and while it’s certainly led me down a much different path, I believe that everything happens the way it was meant to. So that’s my advice, try not to stress it when things don’t work out, because the tough times often lead to you to the very very best times ????
Many happy returns Joy! What a lovely gesture. My advice to you is “proceed as if success is inevitable” – I have this on a post it note in my brain. Otherwise I spend too much time worrying about what I’m doing and whether I’m doing it right, when I could just be getting on with it and making it work. It saves a lot of time and energy and makes me feel happier as a person. There done. Have a lovely birthday and thanks for the great blog.
happy Birthday to you…I’ve been following you for some time now – and I comment every so often – i don’t think there’s is anything I can say to you that you don’t already know…i love your perspective, your writing voice, your recipes and your Sunday post. I have two blogs that i truly love oh by the way i read your 30 year advise liked all of them but the one that stands out is women should nice to one another… so true.
I have a 13 year old daughter so much drama; lately I’ve been telling her
“Be a voice, not an echo!”
I’m following that advise as well!
Today is your birthday; happy birthday! What a fine day to be born!
Marisa B
Happy birthday! I have stopped being so sensitive. When I perceive someone is mean, or behaved to me in a way I don’t like, often it’s about them and how they are feeling. Everyone is dealing with their own stuff, it’s not always about me.
Alles gute zum geburtstag from Switzerland, Joy! I like my dad’s life rule about rules which always keeps things interesting…Don’t ask if you don’t want to know the answer!
Enjoy the smaller things in life because sons day they will be the big things
Listen to your heart. Let your wings carry you freely and gently. Be kind to yourself. Carpe Diem.
Happy Birthday Joy! For a piece of wisdom, I really like the Oscar Wilde quote: “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken”. In other words, be proud of your individuality and try not to care what other people think – ordinary is boring.
speaking as someone who has an additional 30 years to yours – don’t hesitate, don’t worry about 5 years from now, enjoy, smell the flowers, hug an animal, buy art, surround yourself with things and people who make you smile
A very happy birthday day to you!
Happy Birthday Joy! Sharing your life with all of us is such a wonderful gift and we appreciate it so. Thank you! I hope with 35 years under your belt you have the interest and wisdom to experience as much as the world offers!
I’ve told myself forever – be who you are…and reveal everything there is to know and let the chips fall where they may
Happy birthday, Joy!
My advice to you is: When in doubt, dance it out!
Whenever I’m stressed, I dance around my apartment (or in the bathroom stall at work, hah!) and just feel so silly I can’t help but be in a better mood :)
Happy Birthday!
I’m not much older than you (38) but my advice is to not spend too much time looking back or you’ll miss what’s in front of you.
Happy Birthday Joy xx My advice to you is to live, love and enjoy your life the way you want :) (as long as it harms none)
Happy birthday, Joy! Live your life by your own rules, do what makes you happy, and remember to put yourself first once in a while. :) I love reading your blog!
Happy 35 years! I loved turning 35 and every year after just gets better and better. I did something totally unexpected and have never looked back. Enjoy life your way.
Happy birthday! A piece of advice that has continued to help me, particularly as I’ve gotten older, is to take advantage of my right to say no to absolutely anything, without any explanation or excuse. It’s saved me a lot of time and frustration, and probably also some otherwise good relationships.
I’m 20 years your senior, and I’d like to offer this: Every year, every decade IS the best years of your life. Make the most of each day, even the uttermost relaxing ones. There is no wasted time.
My high school math teacher (of all people) once said this to me and it’s stuck with me all these years: never wish for it to be tomorrow; you’re wishing your life away. Always make the most of the time you have.
“Perhaps this very instant is your time…” Louise Bogan
I love this quote??
Happy Birthday Joy
The only advice I can think of is to choose your battles. That helps me to get rid of extra stress
Hi Joy! Happy birthday! I advise you to read lots of Ann Lamott and also a good dose of Mary Oliver and Rilke. Cheers!
Ps- do you still sponsor at Compassion International? I do- thanks to you!
Mary Oliver and Rilke are so good! (I’ve gotten to know both through the website brainpickings.) Great tips!
I do too! I read her post and found a child that day in Kenya and have been happily sponsoring ever since. I think I would say that you never know how your actions affect others-negative and positive; so always be AWARE of how your action (or INaction) affects other people.
Happy birthday!! I hope you have another fabulous year – you know, keep the trend going! My tattoo-worthy advice is Hazard yet Forward!!
From one (musical) artist to another (culinary): we are incredibly fortunate to do what we absolutely love for a living. Life is short; never lose sight of that and never settle for anything leas than absolutely fulfilling for any other area of life. Happy birthday, you’re awesome and inspiring!
Happy Birthday Joy! I hope this year brings you wondrous adventures. My advice is to never dwell in the past. Use each day to challenge yourself to learn or do something new, even if it’s frightening.
I am 30 years your senior and agree with Maryellen – Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday Joy!!! Remember to embrace those in between moments in life. I have learned to be the best version of myself by thriving in those transitional phases, which seem to get more and more frequent as I get older.
Live with passion, love, and peace.
The best advice I can give comes from straight from Hamilton, and I’m pretty sure you’re already following it, but it bears repeating: always write like you’re running out of time and do not throw away your shot. Happy birthday, Joy!
I’m 46, had a late start at happiness (a baby at 42!). The best piece of advice I can give is be present in every moment. Never wish time away because it already goes so fast!
Love Jesus and love others :) and treat yo self to something special every now and then (like diamond earrings!)
I think you already have this covered, but I’d say LAUGH. Never let any situation get so serious that you lose your sense of humor and joy for living. Feel the highs and lows, but look forward to the good and laughter.
Advice is to do whatever makes you happy, wake up and choose the life you want to live.
Happy birthday! I’m approaching 35 as well and it doesn’t feel like I thought. My 30s have been marked with the realization that I know so much more about the world and people. and more at peace with the parts that used to cause me strife. My wise words to myself (and you) would be to be patient with the knowledge you’ll soon know. And know that wisdom will continue to sweeten your life. Cheers!
Be happy in the moment you’re in today. Banish troublesome thoughts and worry. Life is entirely too short not to find your center, your happy place. Disregard those scattered grey hairs, and extra pounds. Be happy with you inside and out. Take it from me. I turned 35 last year. And I know it only gets better from here. Did that rhyme? Haha. Happy birthday!
Happy day to you! Keep doing what fills your soul.
Some things that I’ve learned in my thirtieth year:
-Be patient
-Nuture the relationships that nurture you
-Work hard
-Find fun wherever you can
-Be compassionate
Happy birthday Joy!
Good ol Abe Lincoln once said, “It’s not the years in your life that count, it’s the life in your years.” This quote reminds me of you. Continue to follow your gut and your tastebuds, Joy! Hasn’t steered you wrong yet.
Life keeps going whether we are happy or stressed, freaked out or content, so might as well keep breathing and do the things that allow you to keep breathing
Time and years are both beautiful balms, keep reapplying
You rock and so do precious stones
Happy birthday, Joy! My piece of advice is…. stop looking forward to things! No more, “two days til Friday” attitude! I catch myself in this thought multiple times a week and have to remind myself how lucky I am to have this day. Even if it’s a Monday. :)
Happy Birthday, Joy ????????
I guess my advice for this year, and every year, is a bit of a mantra we used to help us focus and thrive during this last year of unexpected yuck.
See the awesome.
Be the awesome.
Always thankful.
????
It will al be well. It just will.
Listen light.
Joy, Happy birthday and stolat (100 years in Polish)! Two things a) always look for the gold in every situation and b) gratitude is so powerful!!!! Happy happy!
Just keep doing you girl!
Eat all the cupcakes! That is my best advice. ;-)
Happy birthday, Joy!
My advice: never be afraid to care.
Just care about everything (except the things you don’t care about; don’t care about them at all) and don’t be afraid to be the person who cares more.
Not feeling and not caring is smothering and just leads to stagnation.
I feel like this works for relationships and also misc. life stuff.
Love, Hannah
p.s. thanks for creating a lovely, sweet, pink place for me to check in on when I’m sick of writing an essay
You sound like you got it going on. Good for you!
Joyeux Joy! My wisdom (such as it is) is kindness. Do kindness. Always behave as you would want others to behave. And rinse every drop of joy from life that you can. Sending love and wishing you many happy returns of the day. Laura
Happy Birthday from one recently-35 year old woman to another, Joy! My wisdom would be to always use the nice stuff. Wear the expensive, impractical lingerie, burn the overpriced candles, drink the maaaad pricey bourbon. Save nothing for a special occasion. Wednesday night is a special occasion, we made it there!
Katie
dear Joy,
you are beautiful as you are. you are a joy-sparkling star and the world is so much richer with you and your recipes :)
stay as you are and enjoy the ride!
hope your wishes come true!
Hello, Joy. Happy Birthday! I am not 35 yet, but someone once told me that it is not about how many lives you touch. The more important thing is that you are reaching out to someone who needs it. Quality > Quantity. But personally, I think you have mastered both.
I hope you enjoy your birthday week. (Because that is how long birthdays should last).
happy birthday! i’m right there with you, no timelines for me :-)
http://www.impossiblejen.com
Happy birthday! Keep doing what you’re doing! Stay passionate with all that you do!
Happy Birthday Joy! I’m a couple years younger than you, so my “wisdom” is one to take with a grain of (sea) salt, I’m sure. But I would say to remember that you are exactly where you need to be right now. Trust the journey. You’re one of my favourite bloggers and I’ve followed for years- and not just for the awesome bakes! Your humour, independence and tenacity is really inspiring to me! Have a great day x
Be a pineapple
Stand tall
Wear a crown
Be sweet in the inside
Be a pineapple
Stand tall
Wear a crown
Be sweet on the inside
Joy,
College may not have been for you (and that is A-OKAY) but you should celebrate graduating from 34 years of age onto 35 with a commencement speech. If you haven’t heard it before, get your hands on David Foster Wallace’s commencement speech from Kenyon College in 2005. This is 35 and its going to be pretty great.
Brittany
Happy birthday! I don’t know how wise this is, but remember that you are an inspiration. No matter what is happening in any given moment, someone is being inspired by you.
Happy birthday, Joy! I’ve been following your blog since I started my journey as an adult. Now I’m in a city I love selling things I love at a fancy grocery co-op and spending my days talking about wine and beer and recipes and obscure ingredients.
Recently I have learned how useful it is to wait 5-10 seconds before I react to a difficult situation. Whether it’s a customer who is upset or rude, my boyfriend who takes longer than me to think about what he wants to say, or just waiting for my mom to finish her next text message; this has proven itself to be useful in keeping confrontation to a minimum which is something I’ve always struggled with. Being the first to speak doesn’t mean I’m right. Ugh.
Happy birthday. As a whole six months older I have some sage advice. Breathe, exercise and drink water. But balance it with chocolate, tv binges and mimosas.
Happiest of Birthdays, Joy! My little corner of the wisdom market is this: find your happiness in daily moments, big and small. Take the time to truly enjoy the wonderful life you seem to be creating for yourself, and acknowledge the small victories, be then a perfect cupcake or the fun you had making a not so perfect cupcake.
Many Happy Returns!!!
Happy birthday! Wonderfully written post. And well done on the earrings, it sounds well-deserved. :)
My advice is to have fun and you will have success. And even if not “success” you’ll at least have had fun. Which I consider success.
Happy uterus independence day!
As I get older I’m finding a lot of inspiration in the lotus flower, which lives in muddy waters but still blossoms. That would be my advice to you. Blossom, even when your conditions make it hard.
P.S. my instagram is june-nipper, if you need to check that I’m following you and Luna Skye!
Happy birthday!! Love the reflection and your enthusiasm for life.
Joyeux Anniversaire Joy!
May you have the best year yet. Good for you to buy yourself those diamond earrings. You deserve it.
Happy Birthday, Joy! My advice is to always be gentle–with others, but more importantly, with yourself. The world can always benefit from more kindness.
Happy Birthday, Joy! May this new year bring lots of happiness and success your way!
I’ve recently turned 30, and it feels like such a big milestone. I find that growing older and wiser is a huge privilege – becoming more confident, finding your own voice, getting your priorities straight and chasing your dreams. I hope your life gets only better and better!
Happy birthday from an Irish reader, Joy! The best advice I’ve been given by a wise friend of mine is to treat yourself as you would your best friend – be kind to yourself rather than overly self-critical and remind yourself that any bad stuff will pass. Looks like you’ve got it down though – great birthday gift x
Happy Birthday Joy! Sounds like you have the wisdom pretty much sorted out to me, and as I approach the same big milestone I can say that you’ve been a huge inspiration. My own personal wisdom, learned over the past five years that have had some pretty tough knocks in them, is that if you don’t ask you don’t get. Never be afraid to ask for what you want. Ask politely, but ask nonetheless. Worst case scenario you’re just where you started off, best case you get the thing you hoped for. It’s always worth it. x
Happy Birthday, Joy!
My piece of wisdom, which a lit professor once casually offered, is that as you get older the crisis you face in your life will get more and more severe. However, you can take heart in knowing that your ability to cope will evolve at the same pace. When you were 15 and procrastinated on an essay the amount of stress and fear you felt is nothing compared to the trials that you begin to face as the years go by–working for yourself, moving to a new and unfamiliar place, falling out of love. So, know this: no matter what happens you will survive. That is how growing-up works.
Happy birthday! Spend time with the people you love. Acknowledge your blessings every day. Make time to nurture your body, mind and soul. Thank you for the blog. Have a fantastic year, Joy!
If stressed, make a list. Then throw it away. Feels better, doesnt it?
Happy birthday. I think you have a great deal of wisdom . Work hard, have fun. Buy diamonds or pearls. Plan to live too 100
Happy birthday Joy! I think you are wiser than most for your age but a piece of wisdom that I would offer is to eat all the things you want for life is short! Things won’t taste as good when we get older and have trouble eating things.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Your posts always make me so happy. They are always so positive and truthful. Thank you! :)
Wisdom for a 35th year on this planet: Don’t let people steal your joy. Love hard, have fun & drink wine <3
May you have a blessed year
xo
Happy Birthday, Joy! I wish you all the best for the upcoming year! I don’t feel quite entitled to give any life advice at all as I’m still struggling amazingly at figuring out how to play this game we call life! But the one thing I’ve started telling myself over the last year is: don’t think too much. Let good things happen to you and not let worrying over nothing get in the way of happy times. Maybe this reminder helps someone else too :)
Happy Happy 35th birthday Joy! I’ll be there soon ;) My 2cents worth of advice: Be true to who you are: have at least one bro (https://open.spotify.com/track/6NunWZuZ6g9KipJ9Q5Vck7 :) and don’t be afraid to step off into the unknown (at least once in a while :) HUGS!
A piece of wisdom, you’re probably already wise enough! But I love the yogi tea as the tea bags have their own bit of wisdom on them to uplift, inspire and invigorate – get those tea bags, that’s my wisdom. And be yourself, always <3
Ann
Happy Birthday! Have a wonderful day. 35 is a great vintage. I’m getting close to the big four-o and somehow i’m looking forward to it. Things seem to get better and easier as you grow older…
Cheers,
Rosa
Happy birthday! I don’t use instagram so can’t follow you, but wanted to leave a comment even if I can’t enter the giveaway. What you said really resonated, it’s very true. I’m 33 soon, and over the past year have realised that if I keep trying to better others achievements, all I’ll get is unhappy. Instead I’m trying to stop, appreciate the little things in life and, more importantly, remember that the only person I can consistently be better than is who I was yesterday. Coming to that realisation, that I should be the best version of me that I can be, not a better version of anyone else, was both a motivation and a relaxation. Now I do things because I think they should be done, not because someone else does. More responsibility, but more thought and ultimately more contentment. Happiness comes and goes, but contentment and easiness with your life and your path is a much better goal.
Happy Birthday, Joy! Can’t wait to read along and see what 35 has in store for you! A bit of wisdom? Go ahead and simply love people. Find something to like about the person in question — there’s always something — we’re all just people. Oh, and bourbon…there is ALWAYS time and room for bourbon!
Happy Birthday Jo! A mantra that’s worked for me is Don’t Explain..Don’t Complain!
Trust your gut!
Happy birthday, dear Joy! How wonderful you don’t plan anything and let things happen! My wisdom? I recognised that my life gets better and better the older I am. And now I’m near to 50 :) Wish you the same – enjoy your day and all the best for your future!
xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena
http://www.dressedwithsoul.com
35 is a great year. I think… it will take me a while before getting there, but I get the feeling of the big birthday. Your wrinkles don´t have to be a problem, working hard is great when you love what you do (and I love what you do). And getting something for yourself is a great great great feeling. For this year I would suggest that you enjoy, that you look at flowers and eat strawberries (because they both are great), that you listen to beautiful music and dance in the dark. And that you have fun, so so so much fun! Enjoy your year!!
Aria
https://pandaonavespa.wordpress.com/welcome/