Have you ever had the urge to set your alarm for 12:30AM so you could run a marathon at midnight? No. But then, why would you? Have you ever walked out onto unmoving ground and placed a delicate seed in frozen earth? No. But then, why would you? Have you ever removed a pot of boiling beans off the flame halfway through the timer? No. But thenโฆ you get it.
Why are we forcing our minds and bodies and sometimes souls into a brutal January? In the clock of the earth, Iโd say we just slathered on a cold cream and snuggled into bed for a good sleep. We shouldnโt be forcing tired bodies onto shiny Pelotons or deciding the fate of our year when we havenโt fully processed the last. Not that those things are not important or shouldnโt be done. Maybe just, not right now?
I started the idea of a Gentle January about 10 years ago when I was at my winter worst. January was a month that I never looked forward to. I thought it just wasnโt for me. โThe sun is never outโ Iโd say as the excuse for why I was sad. โI ate too many Christmas cookiesโ Iโd say as an excuse for why I had to wake up so early to push myself into racerback bras and hit the weights. I was doing January all wrong.
After deciding to make my Januaryโs more gentle, it turned into one of my most beloved months. I found myself looking forward to it. I craved the dark nights and the cold toes.
If this is your first gentle January, Iโm so glad youโre here. The trick is, itโs unique to everyone. The only rule is to be gentle on yourself. Let yourself go to bed early if thatโs what you need. Last year was a lot, it always is. Sometimes, what you need most before you start your intentions and year isnโt to push through, itโs to reflect. To stock up on your favorite night-time tea. To burn candles to the brass.
Itโs counterintuitive to give you a list of hard and fast rules to gentle January. Because itโs uniquely you. But, if you need inspiration, hereโs how Iโm putting more gentle into my January this year.
- Iโm reading a few new books. Iโve resisted Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas for too long. Iโll read it after I finish Britney Spears biography The Woman in Me. Sometimes I like to re-read a favorite, and for that Iโll read Time Travelers Wife by Audrey Niffenegger.
- A lemon candle can do wonders to reset my year. Iโll burn it when Iโm in bed watching some early-oughtโs comfort TV show or when Iโm doing the dishes at night.
- Iโm going to make dinner for a friend. There is something so special about my people around a table, pouring a second glass of wine and laughing about a dumb memory. The bellies are full, and the fridge is chilling crรจme brulee.
- Finishing the dishes before bed. Some January’s I like to leave the dishes for the next day so I can head to bed early or enjoy a movie. This January, Iโm gifting myself a clean and open morning.
- Spend 6 hours a week writing. Itโs something I enjoy, and itโs often put off in exchange for chores, errands, or distractions. Iโm going to make it a priority to have some creative writing sessions. It fills my cup.
- Wait until the end of the month to set my 2024 intentions. Iโll spend my days journaling and thinking and contemplating the things that Iโm leaving in 2023. Iโm sure Iโll be able to answer the question โwhatโs nextโ a little better with a month of rest.ย
- Execute an โeat downโ. Itโs when we only shop for the essentials and eat down the fridge and pantry. Itโs a great way to make sure things are eaten before their expiration and a little gift to the wallet after a month of being overindulgent.ย
Let me know what youโre filling your Gentle January with! Know that you canโt do it wrong. One of the greatest parts of Gentle January is that one thing on the list usually leaves. The key is to be Gentle on yourself. And letting go is a part of that, too.
Happy Gentle January, Friends!
27 Responses
I really enjoyed this post. It was even written in a gentle tone! 2023 was a crazy year for me and I need this reminder to ease into 2024 by giving myself some grace. Thank you!
I love this so much! I have naturally shifted to a gentle january without even knowing it! Thank you so much for the reminder & ideas. Also the world of Sarah J Maas is amazing.
Love this post! What you wrote resonates with me. I blogged about keeping it simple as my main goal for this year. I’m trying to eat down my freezer and have a resolution to keep my ice drawer in the freezer empty of food containers. Also on my agenda is to read a few books, purchase heirloom seeds for next summer’s garden and take walks. Wonderful things that don’t overwhelm me.
I like the idea of not worrying about one’s goals until after a January of rest. Why do we all tackle that when we are exhausted?
Thank you for sharing your ideas.
This is such a good idea. Thank you for the “permission” to take it slow and gentle.
On the Sarah Maas-books: The second in the series (A court of Mist and Fury) is even better than the first one. So maybe keep reading for that one …
I’m sleeping in a sleeping bag on my bed through the end of the month, for the third winter in a row. I like how cozy it is, I like the texture, I like the warmth, I like not making a bed, I like how it feels like camping.
Yes! This is exactly how I feel about January. I’m in deep wintering mode and need to be patient and kind with myself.
The idea of an “eat down” is genius, I’m going to try this out.
In December, Amy suggested the book “Wintering” by Katherine May in this very spot and it has been my absolute favourite read this winter so far. I’m re-reading it this January.
Can you suggest a good lemon candle?
I love this so much. And even tho my birthday falls in January, itโs always a slog for me, while others are still living in their holiday season tingle. Love the idea of doing less setting my intentions at the end of the month.
LOVE this idea! What’s your favorite lemon candle?
I love this! I’ve always looked forward to the fresh start of a new year. I was saying to my husband the other day that it makes me think about the excitement of the start of a new school year. Which then makes me think of loving New York in the fall and sending bouquets of newly sharpened pencils a la You’ve Got Mail. Anyway, something about that slight creak the first time you open a new planner, empty pages of opportunity.
But this year, I’ve been struggling. I’m still so tired from the lead up to Christmas, between traveling for work and then having my birthday, Christmas (and hosting it!), and my wedding anniversary in the last two weeks of December. And on top of that my husband’s birthday is January 1st. The celebrations just keep going right into the new year which makes it hard to the “start the new year right”. I like this easing into it, taking the time to reflect on the past year, and resting my mind and body with a cup of hot chocolate and a book when we (hopefully!) get our first snow this weekend.
This is EXACTLY what I needed to hear – beautifully written too. Thank you!
This is the way to begin a new year!! Itโs easy to get caught up in the frenzy of putting pressure on ourselves at the start of the new year, especially after coming off of the hype and excitement of the holidays. All go, go, go!! But a reset is smart. For our minds, body and spirit. The old book club I belonged to which disbanded for several years after a devastating fire in our town is starting back up again. That is the highlight of my January and I am so grateful for our community and the lasting friendships.
You are so right, Nancy! So glad you have your book club back too.
Karlee
I love this idea so much. And I’m thankful to be gifted permission to not rush into planning the year ahead. Truly, I don’t feel ready!
I’d like to fill my Gentle January with reading books I already have (to clear space on my shelves) and rolling out my yoga mat by the fire each day, even if I don’t do more than lay on it for a couple of stretches.
Okay, yes, Sarah! I should definitely dust off that yoga mat too!!
Karlee
Hi Joy! Thank you for the reminder to be kinder to ourselves!
Question on the “eat down,” an idea I love. Whenever I tell myself I’ll do this, I see new products (I’m a sucker for new items to try to cook with) or great sales and end up spending just as much at the grocery store! Any suggestions? Thanks!
Jena, maybe this will be helpful: plan your meals for a week or a few days, based on what you have on hand. If you need groceries, make a list and then only shop for those items. Reward yourself for having that discipline by taking a walk or noting something new you saw, but didnโt buy, and telling yourself you can get it โnext time โ. Good luck! Have fun!!
Thanks, Nancy! I actually am an avid meal planner and grocery list maker. I am just tempted by the “new” products! I’ll try the reward system :)
Also, โnewโ products will still be there in a month. And if not, oh well: better to not have tried it only to have it disappear!
You could try shopping on a grocery store app and only putting things in your cart that you need for your meal plan. Then, review the list and order online for pickup. You won’t need to go into the store or look at new items!
I love new products and new recipes too! It sometimes helps me to make a โparking lotโ in a notes app or journal of things Iโm interested in but donโt want to give energy to right now. Then I can go back to the list later when Iโm mentally or financially ready to try something new.
Iโve had that fairy book in my pile for a while now so Iโll join you on this journey!
It’s a beautiful idea. I will be giving it a try. Thank you
What a lovely mindset to consider and adopt. Thank you!
1 too love this idea. I’ve always loved winter and this year I am taking time to enjoy the fire with a cuppa and book. Thank you
I am especially liking this idea, as I had covid over the holidays and am still feeling run down. A gentle January sounds like exactly what I need.
I hear you loud and clear! Gentle allows me time to reflect on the previous year. Letโs me reset my boundaries for myself self and others. My new mindset is asking Is This Enough? And then accepting when Iโm done!