Anyone else having a casual Crisis of Fashion? There’s something about the change in season, my increasing age, and the banishment of skinny jeans that has me simply confused/baffled/bummed about what to wear.ย It’s not so much about sliding my 40something year old self into the latest trends which… 90’s fashion is trending, friends and I’ve already done it.ย I’m also gently and willingly on way up in sizes and after months of being uncomfortable in jeans from 2019, I’ve decided I deserve clothes that fit my body and bring me joy.
But WHAT ARE THOSE CLOTHES?ย I think I’ve found them for myself and I thought I’d share.
Let’s talk general aesthetic because I’m not just whipping money out of my wallet without attaching it to a well considered vibe.ย The general aesthetic is three words I’ve defined for myself so when I’m out rummaging the thrift stores, I stay in my self-determined lane.ย My forever aesthetic is: classic French cowgirl. She is not one person – she is many people, she is a vibe.
All the trendy Tiktok girlies have transitioned from Coastal Grandmother to Coastal Cowgirl but this is more that alliteration.ย And I KNOW, I fall in love with a Texan and it’s all turquoise and cowboy boots but honestly, it really just appeals to me and feels comfortable and classic.
Classic – we’re talking loose men’s button down shirts, straight jeans, tortoiseshell glasses, white sneakers, a good heel, a perfect nude lip.
French – we’re talking sex appeal, ease, slip dresses, square necks, open backs.
Cowgirl – we’re walking denim on denim, turquoise, quality cowboy boots, yes absolutely a Stetson, good leather well worn.
Is this cool? I don’t care.ย Does it feel cool to me?ย Yes, and that’s all that matters.
โขย We all want different things from our denim. It’s very personal.ย I want a classic straight leg. Medium wash. Thick and non-stretch jean.ย When it comes to jeans I’m into a hard pant. I LOVE a Levi because they’re nostalgic and they still make great quality, long lasting denim that won’t completely break the bank.ย These Levi’s 501 Two-Tone Jeans have been my favorite find this year. They’re classic with a subtle Punky Brewster mismatch that I think will carry me for years to come.
โขย As a denim on denim monster, this Essential Western Denim Shirt pairs well with all my hears and clearly leans hard into my cowgirl aesthetic.
โขย I won’t talk myself out of how much I love this belt.ย I think silver and turquoise moments age well and this kind of belt is also great for belting long dresses.
โขย I could forever live in a crisp men’s button down shirt like this Tomboy Shirt or this Crinkle Gauze Shirt. But the best men’s shirts are always at Goodwill, second hand, nicely worn in and the price is right!
โขย I love a flowy short dress with long sleeves like thisย Noemia Dress from Sezane for spring.ย Sexy with a little shoulder coverage because it’s not all the way hot just yet. And these Pyne and Smith linen dresses transition really well into summer. I have a few I’ve worn for years and they’re workhorses!
โขย The grocery shopping or weekend morning outfit is as follows: bike shorts,ย a boxy oxford or a 3/4 zip and a baseball cap.
โขย I don’t have patience for a full makeup situation, especially as the weather warms.ย You’ll find me in a tinted sunscreen, this perfect Clinique Fuller Fig a-little-more-than-nude lip gloss, and this easy smudgey brown shadow pencil.
โขย For body care, I’m slathering myself in sesame oil just out of the shower. Basically, I’m edible.
โขย Shoes are hard.ย Shoes are always hard.ย With jeans I either wearย suede heels or reeboks or I dig through the men’s section of Goodwill’s here in Texas looking for cowboy boots.
โขย One of my toxic traits is that I cannot keep track of earrings. One is allways disappearing I can’t explain it.ย It’s useless to me have any type of costly earrings. They just have short lifespans in my care.ย I humbly buy a bag of very cheap gold earrings and ride with em for as long as I have em.
Now, do share!ย Do you have an aesthetic? Sound off in the comments below!
(And thank you to Will for taking this picture of me on his lunch break.)
43 Responses
Yes. Joy yes! This is why I started a fashion blog 3 weeks ago, why leave style influences up to 20 year olds on TikTok? My three clothing adjectives are nostalgic, breathable and special which are also my life values.
Not long before the pandemic started, I felt like I was landing on a style that I described as “a little bit Katharine Hepburn, a little bit Lorelei, a little bit Time Lord”. However, then I and everyone else landed solidly in the land of soft pants always. I’m slowly coming out of that comfort-hole.
For my birthday last year, I bought myself my very first pair of Louboutins (which I wore once before needed to repair them, because I was too excited and didn’t do research. Did you know you have to put a protector on the sole if you ever want to wear them outside?! 35 is clearly just as impatient as 12). Next on my fashion list is new pants: black skinny, black boot or straight, a dark wash skinny (clearly I refuse to give them up), and a mid wash boot or straight.
I’ve decided I’m in a transitional season with clothes, where I have do-fers that will keep me while/until I research the sustainable “best” version. I want to move away from fast fashion to truly sustainable/repairable/ethical fashion. Baby steps.
Iโm 45 and sticking to my skinnies. Tik tokkers be dammed. Other jeans make me look frumpy, and skinnies make me feel good. Wear what makes you feel good!!!
I am turning 41 in a few months and have found myself unleashing my wild feral self as I age: I’ve said good-bye to almost all waistbands and have a collection of fun patterned boilersuits (coveralls, jumpsuits…whatever they call them) and loose flowy shirt dresses. Leopard print is the new black and I frequently mix it with other patterns. I think the sad state of the world has made me go totally YOLO in terms of not caring what others think, not caring about “trends”, and not caring about what a 40-something “should” wear. Is it comfortable? Does it bring me joy? What I have noticed since going feral, I receive SO MANY COMPLIMENTS from strangers regarding my clothes. So it also brings others joy!
My go-to clothing for this feral shift is RedSky (shopredsky.com) – a small batch, queer + woman owned Canadian clothing shop. Highly recommend for others wanting to unleash their cozy feral side. ;)
Being a New Yorker, I wear the “all black” uniform. Black trousers, black cashmere sweaters turtleneck, black suites, black/dark wash jeans, black tops you get the picture. Boring you say… I say no, it’s not… I do add interesting high end accessories. Chanel ballet flats in the summer, velvet slipper shoes (check out Jon Joseph) and black boots in the winter. Prada did a monkey shoe several years ago-amazing but unfortunately unavailable now. Pearl or diamond stud earrings, watch and rings. Rinse and repeat. Call me boring, but it works. Classics all day everyday!
Much to my husband’s dismay as he loves color and would love to see me in it. So, I do wear white and navy… sticking to the neutrals.
Whatever style make you feel your best and beautiful, I say go for it!