Friendsgiving Food Ideas and 6 Tips To Throw A Thanksgiving Potluck

For the past 6 years (save for our pandemic Thanksgiving) I’ve hosted an epic (according to me and the reactions on friend’s faces) Thanksgiving Potluck.  I drag rugs outdoors, rent old farm tables, set up a full bar and fill the table to the end caps.  It’s always been a bit of a hodgepodge group of friends who have become family, friends of friends with no family in town, and three years ago, the dreamy guy from Houston I was very newly dating and… both of our sets of parents. Buckle up, y’all! The true glory of a Thanksgiving potluck is that it brings together groups of people who may not normally collide. I like to foster the dinner table where I overhear my dad tell my friend Mike’s neighbor my most embarrassing childhood story.  It’s always a delight of dishes and personalities.  Cultivating the menu is important but the vibe is where the memories are made. Watch me pull out the dinner party conversation cards, past a few groans, they upend any smalltalk for something deeper.  Maybe you’re just starting to piece together your Thanksgiving holiday, I hope your table has unexpected guests. Here are a few ways I throw a holiday potluck that is easy on me and comfortable for my guests. 

So, what is Friendsgiving?

Friendsgiving is Thanksgiving with your chosen family: a potluck-style feast with friends where everyone brings a dish, usually held the weekend before (or after) the big day.

Which, if you’ve been reading along, is exactly the party I’ve been throwing for years. Same turkey, same pie, fewer rules, more friends of friends. My favorite kind of chaos.

What to bring to Friendsgiving, at a glance

Short on time? Here’s my potluck cheat sheet, all from my own recipe box:

My 6 tips to throw a Thanksgiving potluck (or Friendsgiving)

As the host of the potluck, I usually make the main dish.

For a traditional Thanksgiving that means I cook the turkey so my guests don’t have to put a whole cooked turkey in their car and travel across town (though I’ve seen it done). But don’t feel hamstrung into making a big bird for the main event.  If your holiday is on the smaller side, this Thanksgiving Pot Pie is everything all at once and I’ll tell ya – Stovetop Stuffing SLAPS. 

Ask friends to bring their most nostalgic dishes.

  Even at a potluck, it’s nice to have a taste of home.  Ask one friend to bring their favorite family stuffing and another to bring their most beloved vegetable side dish. Of course it’s wonderful to have an overlap of dishes and a bounty of side dishes, but we want to avoid every single guest bringing only their favorite cranberry sauce. Before the meal is served, I like to go around the room and have everyone introduce their dish.  A story gives food a splash more color.  It’s really special to have a piece of everyone’s roots in the potluck spread.  I’d bring my aunt Cordellia’s Homemade Potato Rolls (they’re so tender, fluffy and the recipe comes with freeze-ahead instructions!). 

Haul out every platter and serving utensil, plus cards for labeling dishes before guests arrive.

In my experience, guests so graciously arrive with only their warm dishes in tow. Sometimes dishes are still in pots and might need to be transferred to serving platters. Before a potluck, I cart out and dust off all of my serving bowls, platters, and extra utensils so they’re easily accessible for all the incoming deliciousness. Labels are helpful for guests with food allergies or preferences to ensure everyone gets what they want and nothing they don’t.  Listen, if this feels over the top, that’s correct. We’re all the way in. 

Be thankful!

If you’re the host, and most chefy in your friend group, it’s important to remember that cooking for a big group is intimidating to most people.  Don’t forget to be appreciative of everyone’s culinary efforts, no matter what.  I find that people present their dishes with caveats and apologies when in reality it’s an incredible bounty.  It’s nice to remind guests that efforts are delicious and appreciated! Now… tell us words of affirmation are your love language without telling us words of affirmation are your love language. 

Have a stash of to-go containers.

The best part of Thanksgiving is the leftovers (that I usually eat later Thanksgiving evening because I can’t wait). I always have a stash of these reusable to-go containers  so guests can load up on everyone’s dishes before settling into the couch for a post-meal rest. Whoever gathers their leftovers first gets the first pick of couch seats. May the odds be ever in your favor. 

Give everyone a job.

Ok not everyone, and not a job.  I have a hard time asking for help but here’s the thing – guests actually want to help. Having a little task can help ease guests into the party and give them reason to interact with everyone.  Ahead of the party I ask a friend more musical than me to compile a playlist. This is essential work.  I ask another friend to keep an eye out for empty wine glasses (and ask if they need to be refilled), and another friend to be on water duty. Giving away little tasks makes you a gracious, less-stressed host and helps everyone feel responsible for, not only the meal, but the good times around it.

What to bring to Friendsgiving (that travels well)

The best potluck dish is one that’s just as good warm or at room temperature and won’t fall apart in the car. Casseroles, rolls, and bar desserts are the MVPs.

My French Onion Cornbread Dressing is the savory side I’d claim first: smoked andouille, all that French onion flavor, and it serves 8, which is potluck math I can get behind.

If you want to do the work the day before, my Sweet and Savory Mashed Potatoes are your people. You make and layer them ahead, cover them, and keep them in the fridge until mealtime. Feeling fancy? Dauphinoise Potatoes are scalloped potatoes all dressed up (and they serve 6).

And because every table needs something cheesy, my Mac and Cheese with Roasted Tomatoes warms up beautifully, plus any leftovers keep in the fridge for up to 5 days. Those potato rolls from tip number 2? Also a yes, and they’re happy at room temperature.

Friendsgiving desserts that travel

Bars over pies if you’re driving across town. Every time.

Ina Garten’s Apple Pie Bars are slice-and-serve, they hold up wrapped in the fridge for up to 5 days, and nobody has to give you a pie plate back. My Creamy Pumpkin Pie Bars give you pumpkin pie in 9 neat squares. For the whole dessert spread, here’s my list of the best Thanksgiving desserts.

What to bring to Friendsgiving if you don’t cook

Bring the things every host runs out of: a bag of ice, a bottle of something bubbly, a stack of to-go containers (see tip number 5, they’re the real MVP), or a big bunch of flowers for the table.

Nobody has EVER been sad to see a bag of ice walk through the door. Ask the host what’s missing, then show up with it.

How to plan the Friendsgiving menu (without six cranberry sauces)

Make a simple sign-up list by course (mains, sides, bread, desserts, drinks) and drop it in the group text early, so everyone can claim their dish.

Leave a little room for the nostalgic dishes from tip number 2, and save room for the next day too, because the Mega Thanksgiving Leftover Sandwich is the real reason we do all this.

Bonus tip / unsolicited advice:  offer an untraditional Thanksgiving dessert.  My vote is for either this French Silk Pie or a Lemon Blueberry Gooey Butter Cake. Happy Thanksgiving, friends! xo