Joy the Baker

Ten Things I Have Learned From My Cat

by 68 Comments

10 Things I Learned From My Cat

Have you met my cat-animal named TRON?  The cat previously known as Jules Cat Stevens (an entirely unfitting name for this beast of an animal)? TRON is the fluffy, hungry, lazy, crazy creature I let live in my house.  Not only do I let him live with me, but I feed him, well and plentifully.  He’s part wolverine, part shark, and cat so he deserves the best (and a lot of it), so I was thrilled when the folks at Beyond Natural Cat Food approached me about working together on a series celebrating my cat!  Just let it happen… In the coming weeks I’m even designing the perfect CatLady Gift Set (yessss), as well as tips on how to keep your cat healthy and happy.

Over our four short years together, I’ve gotten to know this TRONCAT very well.  He has taught me a handful of lessons about naps, balance, patience, judgement, and good food.

If you have a cat (or pet shark) of your own I’m sure you can relate to one, if not all of the following lessons and nuggets of life advice from TRONCAT.

Thank you in advance for letting my inner CatLady shine.

1.  Every time is nap time.  That means when the little hand on a clock is on any number, and the big hand on a clock is also on any number… you should probably nap.  Go on and get it.  Rest is important.

2.  You’ve seen your human (that girl who feeds you) MEOW the lyrics to songs.  Meowing is universal and especially effective at dinnertime.

3.  Here’s why a hiss is effective.  It’s understated and reveals fangs.  No need to be loud or over the top.  Keep calm but show everyone you’re serious. Also… you have claws for backup, but generally an understated hiss will get your point across.

4.  Most people are the worst people.  Unless, of course, they’re wearing black pants for you to rub your orange fur against… or unless they’re the person that feeds you delicious food.

5.  Scratch the people you love LESS than you scratch the people you don’t like… like, a lot less.  Also consider throwing your loved ones the occasional cuddle but always end the cuddle with a scratch across the knee.  Be nice, but not too nice.

6.  Run away from home exactly ONCE.  Always come home.  Remember, you don’t have to chase the food that falls in your bowl indoors.  Your human places it there because she makes good choices and let’s face it… napping takes priority over chasing food outdoors.

TronCat

photo by Hannah McSwain

7.  If people are eating it, it’s probably delicious and you should go ahead and help yourself… or at least try to.  Most delicious among the food that humans eat in front of you:  salmon, chicken, eggs, sweet potatoes (all actual ingredients in  Beyond Natural Cat Food), and occasionally ALL of the pudding.

8.  Always let people think they can rub your belly.  Put it out there.  Play vulnerable and available.  Maybe even tolerate a belly rub for approximately 2.6 seconds after which, attack at will.  No one gets the belly.

9.  You’re allowed to sit in your chair (aka throne) and judge everything that passes by.  Mostly what passes by is your lady-human with butter and her camera.  She’s ridiculous.  Judge her at will… until she feeds you.

10.  Landing on your feet is both instinct and practice.  Stay sharp, stay hungry.

If you have a cat you know how special (and sometimes terrifying) that relationship can be.  They’re sometimes snuggly, sometimes wall-climbing companions that work their way into your heart despite their sharp claws.

This post is brought to us by Beyond Natural Cat Food.  No corn, wheat, soy, gnarly by-products, or artificial colors or preservatives. Just the real food I give to TRONCAT to keep him extra sassy, nappy, and wise.  To try it yourself, click here!

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Ami Anerd

    I haven’t been here in a while. I am sorry to see your cat’s been renamed. I liked his original name. I hope he has learned his new identity!

    Reply

  3. Paul

    Cats are so weird! We are not cat people, and yet here we are with two – Pete and Bootstrap Bill. And even though they pee and barf EVERYWHERE we still feed them. There just is absolutely nothing as peaceful and life-affirming as a cat napping.

    Reply

  4. Wendy Hillhouse

    My theory is that cats aren’t really domesticated–the only reason we get along with them is that they’re small. Imagine what your cat would be like if it was twice as large! Yikes!

    Reply

    • joythebaker

      My cat is already gigantic Wendy, and I’m terrified sometimes. I couldn’t even begin to imagine if he were people sized.

      Reply

  7. Vanessa

    Thank You Joy for sharing your inner cat lady. I too have one (an inner cat lady)and this makes me want to run home to snuggle the kitties!

    Reply

  8. giselle

    another 2 additions…

    -It’s 3 am and you’re bowl is empty. well almost empty. well, not really empty, but you can see a tiny sliver of the bottom of the bowl. you’re job is to never let your bowl go empty. it must mean it’s time to wake your lady by jumping on her and licking her nose so as to notify her of the empty hole where food used to be.

    -If you’re lady is screaming at you, it means you are probably doing a good job. Continue to do what you’re doing, especially if it’s climbing on the counters and knocking over full glasses of liquid or plants.

    Reply

  11. Maris

    My cat, Smudge, has some of these qualities, but is a little different; this is more Clementine’s modus operandi. He adores attention and sits on my keyboard and bats at the cursor as I type. He also MUST sleep on my pillow (yuck, but I appreciate it). And meows for me to snuggle with him. He also fetches (a trait I accidentally discovered when he was a kitten when this piece of wadded up typing paper kept reappearing next to my lap as I was reading that day)! He is 17 1/2 years old and still loves to fetch. Oh, and he loves it when I put him on a “rug sled” and swoosh him all over the house on the hard wood floors. Hilarious to watch. He holds on for dear life, but loves it and won’t jump off. And lastly, he loves it when I change my sheets (often with 5 affectionate dogs and two cats). I flap the flat sheet up in the air over him and h goes crazy batting at it and jumping around like, well, a cat, but more so. Haha. And the dogs all FEAR him!
    Sorry for the length, enjoyed your article and it inspired me to share :).

    Reply

  12. Susanne

    I have two little monsters…umm I mean kittens…at home. I was literally dying over this post. Thanks for sharing and shine on Cat Lady, shine on!

    Reply

  21. Natasha

    Hi Joy, it was nice to see that other folks who are so much into felines as i am..your tron is such a cute fur ball…even i had a ginger orange cat who would just sit on the sofa and then give a look that says “don’t even think of making me get up from here” lolzzz..and when cupcakes used to be in the room and people eating..then god save the person who it will climb on to get to it with lots of meows… :)

    Reply

  26. julia

    As cute as your cat photos are, it saddens me to see a sponsored post on here, Joy. Let your own originality shine without others telling you what to say!

    Reply

    • joythebaker

      TronCat actually loves Beyond Natural Cat Food, so in a way I guess it’s Tron telling me what to say. Hey, I just feed him!

      Reply

  28. Marriah

    I don’t have a cat (my family are dog people) but I absolutely loved this! Kind of makes me want my own terrifying beast!

    Reply

  30. K

    We got our first KITTEN a few months ago. I say that b/c we had the world’s best cat for 11 years, but he was an adult when we inherited him. So, we chose our kitten b/c he didn’t go all windmill-claws on our 3 boys when we met him in the tiny adoption closet. Our two year old immediately loved him and decided it was totally normal to carry him in a choke hold and ride his plasma car with him . . . b/c cats like that. Anyway, he’s exceptionally tolerant of the three kids and cute and sweet all day, but turns into a vampire-ninja at night! Only with the adults, and mostly with me b/c he loves me the most. What? He likes to come cuddle my head and snuffle it and then ATTACK. I’ve been wondering why it is that I still love this cat b/c he’s a freak, but it sounds like he’s just a totally normal cat. . . . He even goes under the covers to snuggle and it’s fairly terrifying . . .

    Reply

  34. Matt

    As a cat guy, and, in fact, a reformed CRAZY cat guy, I can relate. Your friend Tron looks a lot like two of my favorites: Fireball!(italics and exclamation point were part of his name) and his son, FirePunk, both now deceased. One interesting thing about Fireball! was that he had the longest tail I’ve ever seen on a cat, measuring a full 27″(it was so absurdly long that I had to break ouy a tape measure once, just to know), and his “special spot” to nap, where he spent 80% of his time, was under a rocking chair in the living room, Once I walked in, and he was there as usual, and I suddenly remembered the Southern aphorism, “Nervous as a long-tail cat in a room full of rockin’ chars.” He didn’t look very nervous to me, sprawled out and snoring loudly like a drunken sailor under that rocker :)

    I think that Tron and you are both lucky to have each other.

    Reply

  38. Catherine

    I totally used to meow rather than sing words to songs when I owned cats. Now I put my dog’s name into the song. She is part cat, part dog- an interesting hybrid of qualities and silliness. She perches on furniture and she uses her front paws to bat at things and play. But I appreciate the lack of scratching, she isn’t too cuddly which makes her like a cat again, but she is quite loyal and very concerned with being around me which is a nice switch. I am going to try the food and see what we think of it.

    Reply

  40. carrie

    Your post couldn’t be more timely as I’m about to inherit an 11-year old diabetic cat from my inlaws! Goose is an adorbs tabby like Tron and I’m determined to keep him alive another decade! Excited to try out these nutritious recipes!
    Xoxo Carrie in Seattle

    Reply

  42. Danae

    I was simultaneously reading this post and wiggling the pointy arrow thing on my Netflix menu for my furry beast of a cat to try to grab through the tv screen (his favorite game), so this is perfect! Cat ladies unite!

    Reply

  43. librarianlizy

    Caty Cat would like me to add a number 11: no cozy bed, tall cat tree, or perfectly designed pet pillow is ever as good as the box it came it. #boxesforlife

    Reply

  44. Nadine

    I love this post! All very relevant points – spot on. And my cat looks exactly like yours. :-) They truly are the best (and the best kinds of “friends”).

    Reply

  45. Vanessa G.

    I really think you got the living arrangements wrong…TRON lets you to live with him…not the other way around. Believe me, I know because I have three demanding furballs that allow me to live with and feed them and to be at their beck and call to serve them as they see fit.

    Reply

  47. Jamie

    I hate to tell you this Joy, but toddlers are also “sometimes snuggly, sometimes wall-climbing companions that work their way into your heard despite their sharp” elbows. From one who has a toddler and had some very beloved cats, your list is perfect. TronCat is a very lucky guy. = )

    Reply

  48. Tabitha H

    This made my day! Tron sounds like a force to be reckoned with, and I think it’s so funny how cats think they’re doing us a favor and “allowing” their humans to take care of them. Such dumb butts, but we love them anyway!

    Reply

  50. Megan

    Thanks for letting your CatLady flag fly! I love this list and would suggest an addition…

    11. Just because you hear everything someone says, it doesn’t mean you need to let them know it. In fact, just ignore it. Make them work for your acknowledgment.

    Reply

  51. jane

    I love this post (and all your posts). I love the freedom to change a cat’s name when it’s just not right. I love the tufts of fur that stick out from between his toes. I love my orange cat even though he’s not rightly named, and hope to find one that fits as well as TRON fits your orange cat. I love that TRON is capitalized. Happy pie week, and hope you get to nap and belly rub occasionally. Sneak it in!

    Reply

  53. ChrystinaNoel

    And here I was just thinking it was my roommate’s cat that attacks absolutely everyone. Glad to know this is complete normal…. or at least that’s what I’m going to tell myself now.

    Reply

  58. Valiantly Varnished

    Haha! Yes I have two furry beast I live with. They are brothers and ironically the little one Declan is the one you should watch out for. We call him the Little Gangster. His brother Finn is just all about the food. And is obsessed with my mother who lives with me. He stalks her and doesn’t like being in any room she isn’t in.

    Reply

  59. shelly

    yes yes yes! so sweet. i wish i could put a picture in this comment because i actually have a picture of my cat wearing a shark costume. he was most displeased but we got some laughs out of it.

    Reply

  62. Jill

    Hahah I can relate. Since I’ve been home from work all week recovering from surgery, I’ve gotten to spend way more time with my cat, Josie. I knew she slept a lot, but I’m shocked that she does pretty much nothing else!

    Reply

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